Kip had just left, Jewellia had left not long before, so Gina and Abitha are sat at the library computers.
Awkwardly...
In Silence... (Scene continued from previous...)
Perhaps not so much a severe reaction as... simply more of a reaction than Gina usually gives. Which says something in and of itself. But Gina never quite loses that air of casual indifference, even as she gives a small humming sound in acknowledgement of Abitha's answer. Gina doesn't break the long silence, either, apparently comfortable enough in the awkward conversational spaces. She lets it stretch and linger, seeming intent on her own screen, replying to messages and clearing up some inbox, before she says-- without looking over-- "Looking for make-up tips?"
A snort is followed by a, "Dammit." Abitha sighing as Gina got amusement out of her again. Silence. Refocus. Inhale. Open mouth. Close mouth. Lip quirk. Inhale again.
"You knew. The day we met. You knew I was weird like you. Like others." Abitha starts, having not been sure what to say and still not sure she knew what she was saying as she did. Another glance at Gina. She had stopped typing. Her hand was on her can, finger tapping it lightly as she stares at her screen, though her thoughts were elsewhere.
Gina's typing away, writing an email. The clickity-tap of keys doesn't even falter as Abitha asks her question-- but there might be a momentary pause after the paragraph. Gathering her thoughts on how to answer Abitha, or the email? It's such a brief pause, however, and Gina is soon continuing the typing. "Yup." No lie, or beating around the bush, or even treating it like an important issue. She sounds as if she's just confirmed she knows where the bathroom is in the library. "Everybody who's got it can feel it. You show up and it's like someone dropped a boulder in the lake."
"Yeah. I mean, I get that now." Abitha clicks through some things, then brings her hands away from the computer, leaning back into her seat and crossing her arms. She does now turn her body a bit to regard Gina, peering at her curiously. It's pretty clear this was a difficult conversation for the gamer to have, and a lot of that had to do with Gina's usually reticent behavior, "How much did you know about it back then?"
"I've always known."
The words sound matter of fact, tinged with that that mocking, teasing, difficult to define tone of Gina's. "Spent a while as a kid waiting for all the other fuckers to catch up. You'll notice it here. It's almost normal. Like fog or bad tips." She ceases her typing, collecting her juice box and sipping again, "I don't get involved. I'm retired." A flat, certain statement.
But all that just led Abitha to shift even more, her shoulder now leaning more against the back of the chair, her legs crossed. This was conversation posture now, not faking like there was something more interesting on the computer screen, "Can I break all this down into some questions for you, and you not tell me to fuck off? Like, I get that you say you're not involved, retired." She lifts a hand to tug some loose flyaways behind an ear, frowning, "But... please... I guess."
Gina finishes typing whatever it is, sending it off and then setting the computer to turn off. Doesn't she have a cell phone? Couldn't she have written those emails from her cell phone?! But now that she's done she leans back in her seat, one arm going back to rest a shoulder on the backrest of the seat, her free hand reaching for the juice box to give it a shake - still got some left! So she FINALLY turns her head a little, to look at Abitha sidelong, and after one long, assessing moment, shrugs, "It doesn't really work like that. Answers, I mean. But yeah, sure, why not." Gina does not sound particularly enthused at the idea-- really it's as if she's decided to kill a little more time and Abitha is a useful distraction.
Well, thats just the attitude that Abitha was going to have to deal with. "Then first... retired?" She asks, looking confused, "You still live in the town. How do you say you're retired when it seems like you're in the same boat as everyone else? Like I get you're probably just trying not to get involved in shit or going looking for trouble, but do you avoid Dreams? Can you avoid Dreams?" The thought hadn't even occured to her until she was halfway through the question.
The corner of Gina's lips tilt upward, in that sly little half-smile of hers, but her eyes certainly aren't smiling. "Nope. You won't be able to, either." The words are low - this is a library - and spoken with a sense of finality and certainty. "Even if you left Gray Harbor-- it'd only happen less. A lot less, but it'd happen." A pause, as she wets her throat with a small sip of juice. "I just remain as normal as possible." Says the purple-haired, counterculture misanthrope. "Next question."
This, of course, is a disappointment to Abitha, the hope dashed before it can even get its first breath. She frowns, eyes flicking aside briedly before looking back to Gina. She considered making a remark about just how normal Gina seems, but that would likely be counter-productive. "I guess... Why just declare yourself retired? Was it work? Or did something happen?" She pauses, then raises a hand defensively, thoughts becoming questions mid stream of consciousness, then having to backpedal after they are voiced, "Or is that too personal?"
That question does nothing but put a glimmer of dark humor in those formerly humorless eyes. It's still not exactly that Gina seems particularly /happy/, but nor does she seem morose. Gina.... is just a difficult person to read, emotionally. "Yeeaaaah, how about this. How long have you done freaky shit?" Gina asks, the not-quite-smile growing, turning to look Abitha right in the eyes, if the other woman won't look away. The questions are unhurried, casual, with that slight edge of amusement, not sounding pointed in the slightest. "How many Dreams do you think you've fallen into at this point? What's your near-death experience count?"
Questions turned back on her, Abitha gets a bit of a squint in one eye. The way the inquiries were made, she was figuring she was about to be condescended. Either way, she plays ball. If you want honesty and respect, you give it. "I manifested about a year ago... I guess I've Dreamed only about a handful of times? And near-death like... None. I don't think I've ever been touched, but that's with warning things were already super dangerous."
Gina's smile doesn't alter. Her expression remains exactly the same as she says in a somewhat dismissive tone, "If you're lucky, you'll survive a few dreams once in a while. If you're not, you'll die, latch on to some weird fucking goal to power through the shit you'll go through, or you'll get real fucking tired of it all. I went with option three. Next?" It really is that simple with Gina. Brusque but (almost) smiling, a little distant, it's just that simple for her to give answers-- when she wants to.
It was the brevity and that smile while Gina says it that sort of shocks Abitha. Her brows furrow as she looks at the woman. Again, false-start on a question, jaw opening, then closing. She tries again, because as simple as it seems for Gina to answer, it wasnt as simple for Abitha to accept, "Is it... just that simple for you? 'You live or you die.' You don't care either way?" She takes a breath, rolling it around in her head before making an addendum, "Cuz like... I can say all day I hate people, humans are the worst, call all my subs mouthbreathing neckbeards. But I still have family, I still have friends. People shouldn't just... die..."
Again, Gina's inflection and her expression don't change much. They could be discussing something else entirely. "There's a thing that looks like a cute little boy in England. He has a tower that's upside-down and wrong." Gina shrugs and has another sip of her juice. "It's full of servants with smiling faces where the mouths aren't where they should be, and if you try to leave all the servants will appear. To get out, if you can't just slice the Veil, you have to throw someone else into the mirror where it watches you, or you have to get rid of all the servants. There were maybe eight of us. Three of us got out. Not exactly something I could put on my sixth grade 'What I did during Summer essay.'" Gina's smile hasn't moved, but there's just a-- sharpness, to her lounging air. "After what happened in third grade, though, I was already expecting it. You don't get to hear that story." Another sip of her juice box, the last sputtering sips sounding between them. "People die. If you've got the thrum and the song, you die more. If you're lucky."
There's a slow, intense blink at the little story, her eyes taking on a widened look as the implications dawn on Abitha. She proccesses in silence for a long moment before she can ask the clarifying question. "So that's why you don't tell people. Warm them. You don't want them to be prepared for when you have to do what you need to to survive." The most flowery and diplomatic way she could state 'murdering to save your own skin'. At least, this was all the assumption Abitha could gather from Gina's words, anyhow. Unless... "Or do you just not want to get close to someone or bond over it because of the risk involved?"
"No. Mostly it's because most people are assholes who get upset at stupid shit." Gina says, and the not-quite-smile then turns into a full smirk. "Pretty good story though, isn't it?" She says, and her tone becomes that slightly teasing, maybe sarcastic, maybe amused one, both brows rising. Did-- has Abitha just been had? Is Gina that big an asshole?
It's possible.
For now, she just shrugs. "Most people start showing the freaky in this town during puberty or before. Mostly because that's when people are dramatic fuckers. Anyway, mostly people just annoy the shit out of me, and there's only a few people that make it in the 'tolerated' field. Only family I care about is my dad, too, so I'm just not really a people person."
Abitha looks just as confused and frustrated as before, which was likely just what Gina wanted, her face a mask of furrowes brow, tweaked lips, green eyes staring across at Gina.
There was no look of concentration, no harmful intent on the gamer's face, Gina might even think maybe Abitha didn't mean to be so invasive. Afterall, as Abitha's mind opens to try to osmose the feelings from the other woman, she left her curiosity and concern bare to view, as one Mentalist to another might read.
It wasn't until Abitha's mind felt the frustration of another patron stacks and stacks over, and proccesed she couldn't feel Gina's emotions at all, that she realized what she was doing, shock, then shame clear on her surface before she was snapping back into herself. Her hands were coming up in an apologetic palm-out motion, she'd be quick to apologize, but... Well Gina should have the ability to nuke her for it.
Gina's been lounging, it's true. This whole time. But when that discordant note interrupts the symphony of the mind that is her Glimmer senses, she can feel it, a trilling note trying to follow along with the tune. Gina's expression...simply shutters. The smile slips away, the crinkles around the eyes disappear, and the indifferent look settles firmly on her features as she watches Abitha's realization of what she's doing. Still casually, Gina straightens, and tosses the small juice carton into the trash near the computer. "You'll learn to get a handle on that. Just because you're using it unconsciously doesn't what's out there can't sense it. Got anything else you want to ask?
Abitha had been about to hurry into an apology when Gina preempts her. More frowning, but a somewhat searching look as her eyes slip back and forth. When she looks back up at Gina, sees the RBF slid back into place, Abitha's own expression seems to harden. This was going nowhere, and she felt like she was stupid for even asking. This woman had done nothing but hold people at arm's reach every time she saw her.
She sighs, looks back to her computer briefly, probably telling Gina exactly what she was already sure of, "Yeah, you're right." She could apologize for being insensitive, she could try to make Gina understand, but... Abitha wasn't that emotionally aware to begin with. So what does she try?
"Sorry for wasting your time."
A thin curve to the lips appears -- and disappears just as quick. Just that sliver, so quick it could've just been shadow and wishful thinking. "It's whatever. You couldn't waste my time unless I wanted you to." She says, a simple point of fact. When Gina doesn't like something, she just-- walks away. Arms rise, Gina stretching as her fingers link above her head, back arching. "Just remember. Anybody who has answers is only telling you the shit they believe. The Veil, the Dreams -- there are no answers. Only what's happening now, until shit all changes again. And don't treat the tunes as a reality bug to exploit like half the people in town. It's like a webpage with a random chance of infecting you with a virus. And no antivirus or malware can grab it." Gina looks towards Abitha, RBF and indifference still in place... before there's a smirk again, "Or whatever. Don't take my word for it. You do you."
Computing. Processing. Quirked brow, narrowed eye, flattened lips. Green eyes still observe Gina for a moment not sure whether to feel better Gina smirked or worse since it followed an admission she was right. Was that a gloat?
Abitha's laptop is unplugged, the gamer craning forward to click the Ethernet cable back into the computer it had actually belonged to. Obviously, the smirk and the addendum resulted in a dry, "Thanks. That clears it up totally..." As she's giving a slight roll of her eyes and lifts her computer to slide it into a messenger bag.
Sure, some of these statements could be considered as a crack in the facade. One was admitting she dodnt mind Abitha using her time. The other sounded suspiciously like friendly advice. More squints from Abitha, always suspicious of possibly trolly intent. It's not like the gamer would make any egotistical assumption Gina liked or even tolerated her.
"Well... Thanks, regardless, I guess. How's retirement? Relaxing?"
Gina gives another little shrug, "Most of this you have to figure out your own way of dealing it. Sure as fuck I'm not an expert at it. There's as many theories about all this shit as there are ways people talk about it. I hear it, I feel it. Like a guitar string against your skin." Blandly said, in that breezy way of hers that's maybe a little suspicious. "But I'm enjoying the retirement. The diner keeps me entertained. You should consider it. Can't miss what you don't get involved in." Gina herself rises from her seat, smoothening out her woolen cloak.
"Huh..." A thoughtful sound, "Always felt like static to me... Like a balloon making my hair stand up" Abitha comments without thinking, now moving to standing as well. The bag is lifted and slung across her body, her hands shoved deep in the big pockets of her sweater. She gives Gina a long look, then shrugs.
"I guess... I guess I just wish we'd talked more when we first met." Abitha admits after a moment, finding no other way to word it without sounding awkward. It's not like she succeeded this way either, but there it was.
"I don't like people." It's a flat, honest statement. "They try my fucking patience and investing time and effort into the new ones is usually a waste, since who knows if they'll stick around. Or survive. I only barely tolerate those I guess are friends, and them only half the time. " Gina pulls her phone out of her pocket, checking the time. "It's not personal. I've just got too few fucks to give to waste them, and half the time what the shiners want is somebody to join their Power Use For Noble But Dumb Reasons Club. Or for somebod to make things make sense for them."
Is Gina... explaining herself to Abitha?!?! WILL WONDERS NEVER CEASE!?!
Oh wait, look, the smirk is back. "Besides. Stumbling through and seeing who manages to survive when they hit the Dreams is practically traditional hazing." Gina remarks, already taking a step or two away from Abitha-- walking backward -- towards the entrance.
Oh, the sudden personal explanation is not lost on Abitha, and of all the things that Gina had said the entire time, this might have been the most confusing. She stares after the purple-haired woman's exiting pace. Hazing with potentially deadly results, oh that sounded absolutely lovely. Wasn't making things make sense exactly what Gina had tried to do for her? Was that all voluntary action?
Obviously, this was too complicated a social math problem to compute for the little gamer, so she just... sighs... heavily, at least theatrically exasperated by Gina's suggested trial-by-fire. She raises a hand and waves her goodbye. She does raise her voice as Gina gets out the door though, a thought occurring to her, "So make-up tips are ok, then?" There's a clear smirk, the joke being lobbed at Gina's retreat, ready to be ignored.
Predictably, it is entirely ignored. Gina turns fully, and just-- walks out.
Abitha will just have to ask about eye shadow next time, and see what happens.
