2019-07-13 - Meet Janet Blake

A local might be used to the drizzle that falls from the sky, but Genevieve isn't, not yet. She carries an umbrella with her as she and Eli walk through the cemetery, her eyes occasionally drawn to a marker, making her pull them to a stop so she can study it. "There is so much history here, I don't think I've ever lived anywhere that had a cemetery like this." She lets Eli lead her through the different monuments and trees, tilting her eyes up as the rain falls a little harder.

Eli is comfortable here. He wore a light jacket with a hood, but didn't bother with an umbrella. While he doesn't seem to have a particular direction to his steps, he knows his way around the different parts of the cemetery and leads them from section to section. He nods in agreement with Genevieve's comment. "Sometimes I wish they could talk. The stones. The further back we go the older the sites get - I'm sure many of the stories of those people are entirely lost." He seems a bit saddened by this fact. He slows up by what looks to be just another stone and casually reaches out, resting his hand on top of it. Then he closes his eyes, face losing some of its color and his expression tightening. He opens his eyes again, shifting them around as though he's seeing more than is really there in that moment in the rain. It's only for a few seconds that he does this, before pulling his hand away again and shaking his head. "Grief. Loss. Helplessness. Sometimes there is none of that. I think that's worse."

When Eli goes pale, Genevieve looks concerned. She steps closer, squeezing his hand. "Hey." Her voice is quiet, blue eyes shifting from the stone to Eli's face. "Are you okay?" He might be wearing a jacket, and he might be used to the rain, but she covers both of them with the umbrella, doing her best to keep them both dry. She glances out at the other stones, frowning. "I don't know Eli, if they could talk, what would they say? Sometimes I think I want to know, other times I think we're better off not knowing."

"I'm fine. I can feel the emotional interactions with the stone. It's no surprise they're no very happy feelings." Eli says, taking Eve's hand and squeezing it before moving away from the stone that he'd touched. He nods to her reply. "I don't know that I'd want to hear all the stories, it's just sad that they've been entirely forgotten as time marches on. Here - let's head up that way." Eli points. It doesn't look all that different than the section they're currently in. He keeps in close beneath the umbrella with her, trying to make sure she doesn't end up wet in her efforts to keep him dry.

"Well, that..leads to a very good question." Genevieve falls into step with Eli, staying close, holding her umbrella steady. "What do you want your story to be like? If someone could remember you, hundreds of years from now, what do you want them to remember?" She laces her fingers through his, watching her feet to make sure she's not stepping anywhere she shouldn't be. She upnods to one of the trees, eyebrows raised. "Should we take refuge there until it goes back to a drizzle?"

"Good idea." Eli says to idea of seeking some shelter. He moves with Eve over toward the partial cover of the large tree and tucks in close to the trunk, looking out across the stones as the rain comes down harder on them. He squeezes her hand again and returns to the topic, shaking his head. "I don't know, Genevieve. I've thought about it. About what it means to be remembered after you're gone. I think some people get very caught up in how they'll be remembered rather than actually focusing on how they're living. I also realize that until this last month if I died no one would have really noticed at all." Perhaps that's an exaggeration, but it's not a huge stretch. "I think I'd like to have an impact on the people close to me. And I'd like that circle to be a bit larger than it is now." He turns to look at Genevieve to watch her expression.

Genevieve squints out at the rain, sighing as it starts to come down harder. She pulls her umbrella down, leaning it against the trunk before she nods. "What kind of impact do you want to have on the people around you, Eli? There are so many ways that you could do that, you know?" She blinks and glances up at him, her expression clouding slightly as she takes in his words. "You want your circle to be a bit larger than it is now." Her voice is a little hesitant as she repeats his words, clearly there are some things running through her head. She shifts and squeezes his hand, turning to look out at the raindrops as they plop wetly on the saturated ground. "How much larger?"

Eli's gaze narrows a little at Genevieve's reaction to his words, his own expression uncertain. "I don't really know. I meant it as - well, I don't have a lot of friends. I think I'd like to change that, you know? I get that's not a thing most people think about as a specific goal, but I've done a petty good job about keeping away from those kinds of relationships as well." He explains. "Does that make sense? You look ... worried." He says, squeezing her hand and looking out in the same direction she's facing.

To say that Genevieve looks relieved is an understatement of epic proportions. She lets out a laugh, catching Eli in a squeezing hug, the movement jostling them against the tree. Moisture drips down from the leaves, getting them a little wet as she holds him. "I think that's an admirable goal, Eli. I also think that you're doing that. It isn't something that happens overnight, especially if you're like we tend to be.. insular and introverted." She releases him, but doesn't move too far away, her laughter softer now. "Sorry, I thought you meant something different for a moment, and I wasn't sure how to react to it, that's all. I'm not worried."

Poor Eli still looks confused as though he doesn't have any idea what Genevieve thought he was talking about, but he does seem relieved, laughing when she hugs him and pushes back against the tree. He closes his eyes when a big drop lands right on his face, shaking his head to clear it while he hugs her in return. "Oh, good. And I know it won't happen overnight. Slow and steady. And you've been an amazing influence. I mean, in a lot of ways - but I find it easier to talk to people." He blinks his eyes clear of the droplet and looks into Genevieve's face. "So. I still didn't really answer your question. I don't think I have an answer about the kind of impact I want to have. Do you know?"

Genevieve sees the confusion on his face, reaching up to cup his cheek, her thumb brushing gently against his skin. "Something you said, and how you looked at me, it just, momentary brain seize and worry. Words can have a lot of meanings, you know?" She hugs him again, taking a deep breath as she considers things, listening to the quiet rain falling around them. "I think that people will remember us, because we all have the potential for immortality within us. I won't focus on how to do it, if it's meant to happen then it will, if it doesn't.. I still will manage to be happy, if I have a happy life I don't really care who remembers me or how impactive I was."

"I think that's the thing. We have to focus on the impact we make while we're alive and be happy doing that. People will remember that when we're gone, but it honestly doesn't matter all that much. We're not here to bask in those memories." Eli looks out over the stones again and then up toward the sky, the rain having shifted to a drizzle again. "Here. I want you to meet someone. Not exactly FaceTime, though." He remarks, taking Genevieve's hand and pulling her back out from beneath the tree and in the direction of a nearby row of stones.

Genevieve chuckles softly, nodding as Eli speaks. "Sometimes we're the only people who get to feel that impact, Eli. It can be disheartening to learn that those memories are carried by the people they lifted in life." She follows him when he pulls her from beneath the tree, moving close so that they bump each other gently as they walk. "I thought you were talking about children for a moment there, and it threw me." She tilts her head up, gazing steadily at him as he leads them through a row of stones. "Do you want children someday Eli?"

Eli misses a step at the mention of children. That wasn't what he was talking about at all - and it takes him a few steps to process the idea. "I - yes." He says, though it's not an entirely convincing answer. "It's a complicated question." He admits, looking down toward Genevieve while he answers. "I like children. I like the idea of being able to give a child a better life than I had growing up. But, I also worry about this place and this ... " He taps his head. "Whatever it is. Is it a kindness to bring someone else into this madness?" He's rambling a bit, certainly a man who has been caught off guard by a question he wasn't ready to answer. "It would be something I'd want to discuss with my partner." He adds, eyebrows lifting in Eve's direction.

"I won't let this town decide my future." Genevieve had her moment being thrown back under the tree, she's remarkably calm now, her eyes on Eli as he tries to say what he's thinking. "One day, I'm going to want children." She squeezes his hand, turning her gaze to the stones that they pass. "It's not anything we'll have to worry about now though." She turns her head back, offering Eli a reassuring smile. "One day, you'll have to tell me more about your life growing up, Eli. I want to know what made you what you are today." She leans in to bump against him, trying to be reassuring. "I didn't upset you, did I? That was not my intent."

"You didn't upset me. Just took me by surprise. It's something we should talk about and likely a lot of other things. I know we've jumped in head first and I wouldn't want it any other way, but likely a lot of small and large questions we should work through in the next little while. Wish there was a list somewhere, but I'm sure at least talking about kids is on the list. I know it's not something to worry about right now, but good to be at least on the same page about the 'someday in the future'." Eli stops at an unremarkable stone, amongst dozens of other unremarkable stones. "I will tell you more. It never seems like the right time. But, I should make time. At least I can introduce you to mom while we're here." He gestures at the weathered stone. It has the named "Janet Blake" carved into it. "She would like you very much." He notes.

Janet Blake. Genevieve gazes down at the stone, kneeling to pick away a few weeds that have gathered along the base. She is quiet while she works, her hands muddy now, but she's used to that and it doesn't seem to bother her. She tilts her head to gaze up at Eli. "One day we'll just lay in bed and ask each other a ton of questions. Try to figure out what both of us want and if we should even be doing this...relationship thing." She frowns and then adds. "I don't think we'll come to that conclusion, but I doubt things will always be so rosy where we agree with each other and birds sing in the background." She turns her head back to the stone, resting her hand against the base of it. There is no power behind that touch. "It's a pleasure to meet you, Janet. You son is quite the man. Thank you." She stands up, gazing over at Eli with a smile. "Let's go home before we get soaked to the skin, we'll bring flowers for your mother very soon."

"I think that sounds like a good idea. The talking. The flowers. And the getting back into town before we're entirely soaked." Eli says, smiling a little while he watches Genevieve work away to remove some of the weeds. When she's ready he slips an arm around her waist and starts to guide the pair of them on the quickest path toward the exit. When they walk by the stone next to his mother's with the name 'Edward Blake' carved across it, he doesn't even spare it a glance.