2019-11-22 - He Ain't Heavy

Lalo isn’t working tonight, but he’s back in the hospital anyway with a bag of what’s probably food. It's quite late, so there aren't many visitors coming in to the hospital. Working here has its perks. As he passes the nurses’ station, one of them looks up and smiles. “Hey, hon,” she says. “Going up?”

“Yes ma’am,” Lalo replies with a grin. “Got some Go Fish to win and some chisme to share. You gonna come hang out?” He lifts the bags toward her as though to tempt her into it.

The other nurse laughs, shaking her head as she says, “I wish. Let him know we’ll be up with his meds soon, though, okay?”

“Sure, mama. Don’t wait too long, you know I miss you.”

Her laughter follows him into the elevator as he presses the button for the floor with the psych ward.

He steps out when the elevator doors open, walking down the hall until he comes to his brother’s room. There’s a quick knock, before he opens the door. “Hope you’re not naked, or if you are you’re ready to have an audience for it,” he says as he heads inside.

Matias is not, in fact, naked, but is lying in bed watching a soccer game on the TV in his room. He looks over when Lalo comes in, and he snorts, scooting up so he’s more sitting than lying. “Cállate, idiota,” he says, and Lalo grins, grabbing a chair to pull it over and setting the bags on the table.

“Fuck you,” he says, and he opens the bags, pulling out one of the boxes and handing it over. “Eat your burger.”

Matias obliges, opening the box and assembling his food, before he takes a bite. He sighs, his eyes closing briefly as he savors the taste. “Man,” he says from around the mouthful, “that’s so good.”

“I know, right?” Lalo slides a little bit further down in the chair, stretching his legs out in front of him and crossing them at the ankles. “Guess who I saw the other day yelling at some doctor?” he asks.

Matias looks up curiously, though it doesn’t deter him from eating. “Hm?”

“This girl. Quyen. You remember her? She came, like, a year before we left.” He doesn’t have to say where he’s talking about. Matias knows. “She’s cute. Maybe I should schedule you for some counseling with her, huh?” He wiggles his eyebrows up and down a couple of times.

“You’re such a dick,” Matias replies with a sound that’s in between amusement and outrage, and he reaches over to punch Lalo in the shoulder.

His brother avoids it easily, dissolving into a louder laugh. “I’m just kidding, jesus. Calm down. I’m just saying, she looks good. She was nice. Maybe you two could hang out.” There’s a tiny hopeful note in his voice, even though he tries to play it off.

“Yeah, sure. We can hang out. I can show her the wonders of the psych ward. That’s a great place to take a girl. Tons of excitement all the time.” There’s just a slightly sharper edge to Matias’ tone at this, even though the humor is still there.

“I don’t mean on a date,” Lalo replies. “Fuck. I just mean maybe you guys could talk. That’s all.”

“Yeah, whatever.”

They lapse into silence as Matias eats, but it’s companionable for the moment. Lalo’s gaze wanders toward the TV, and he watches the game for a few minutes as he lets his brother eat. “Carrillo’s on fire this season,” he comments, and Matias makes a noise of assent, but other than that doesn’t answer for a few minutes more.

“Hey, Lalo,” he finally says.

“Yeah, guey? What’s up?”

Matias sets his food down, looking up at his brother from the bed. His face is suddenly very worn, and drawn, and utterly exhausted. Someone coming in might think he was the elder of the two, if they saw them together at this moment, except for a flash of vulnerability right before he speaks.

“Think this time I’ll get better, too?” he asks.

Lalo meets Matias’ gaze, watching his younger brother for a few seconds before he replies.

Maybe it’s time to admit that you’re not going to get any better. Maybe it would be kinder, in the long run.

“Yeah,” he says. “I do.”