2019-12-07 - Emergency Preparedness

(TXT to Rhys) Sparrow: Where do chatty squirrels spend their off hours?

(TXT to Sparrow) Rhys: Hm. In a nutbar?

(TXT to Rhys) Sparrow: Does he have a nutbar of choice?

(TXT to Sparrow) Rhys: Kinda partial to a PayDay.

(TXT to Sparrow) Rhys: Or whichever one's doing karaoke night!

(TXT to Rhys) Sparrow: I can wait til another karaoke night if I gotta, but if you care to get together before that, lemme know?

(TXT to Rhys) Sparrow: Pretty sure we can sing just about anywhere. If there's gotta be singing.

(TXT to Sparrow) Rhys: Well, where do multiloquent birds spend their off hours? Squirrels show up just about anywhere. Ask any gardener.

(TXT to Rhys) Sparrow: Wherever waffles, whiskey or berliner weisses might be found?

(TXT to Sparrow) Rhys: If you know somewhere that provides all three I'm sold.

(TXT to Sparrow) Rhys: I also seem to recall I owe you a demonstration of emergency procedures.

(TXT to Rhys) Sparrow: You do. Would that demonstration be safe for public viewing? Cuz I'm pretty sure there's something waffly on offer at the Firehouse... but I've got a waffle iron of my very own too.

(TXT to Sparrow) Rhys: Well, I can assure you we've lost fewer than 12% of those exposed thus far... but of course there's reasons we reserve these things for emergency deployment. Is your waffle iron often whiskey-and-weisse-adjacent?

(TXT to Rhys) Sparrow: I expect our industries have very different ideas of acceptable losses, so I'mma place my trust in you here.

(TXT to Rhys) Sparrow: My waffle iron is very frequently booze-adjacent. There's even some damned fine wine, if you prefer.

(TXT to Sparrow) Rhys: Waffles, whiskey, weisse, and wine? Wonderful.

(TXT to Sparrow) Rhys: And were you thinking acceptable losses for musicians or chemists? Because now I'm curious where the lines are drawn for both.

(TXT to Rhys) Sparrow: I was considering chemistry, which might require a decimal point in front of that one, but.

(TXT to Rhys) Sparrow: What I do with my drums is very technical too. I skip a beat and the whole world's off-kilter.

(TXT to Rhys) Sparrow: You free now or are we making plans?

(TXT to Sparrow) Rhys: In that case, drum palpitations might qualify as a valid emergency.

(TXT to Sparrow) Rhys: Unfortunately I'm moderately expensive now -- working tonight. Tomorrow?

(TXT to Rhys) Sparrow: I'm given to understand you're well-prepared to address emergencies, so.

(TXT to Rhys) Sparrow: No promises about tomorrow. Got this jello thing that miiiiight need some prep. But soon.

(TXT to Sparrow) Rhys: Stellar at addressing them. Sent the last one to 1600 Pennsylvania Ave. Jello's tomorrow, huh? Picked a flavour for it?

(TXT to Rhys) Sparrow: That sounds like a story...

(TXT to Rhys) Sparrow: Jello is in a couple days, but might need to help with the jellofication. Think we're going cherry and lime. All nice and festive.

(TXT to Sparrow) Rhys: If you add in some whipped cream, you could get the trifecta.

(TXT to Rhys) Sparrow: Pretty sure something can be arranged. Planning on coming by?

(TXT to Sparrow) Rhys: Barring emergencies! You know, I should really be angling for an inside line on the odds here.

(TXT to Rhys) Sparrow: I'mma win, obviously. Right? 😉

(TXT to Rhys) Sparrow: Might be convinced to offer some more earnest insight in exchange for clever bribes.

(TXT to Sparrow) Rhys: How clever are we talking? Family Scrabble champion or Stephen Hawking?

(TXT to Rhys) Sparrow: Can start with a triple word score. Since it's for charity and all.

(TXT to Sparrow) Rhys: Hm. I've got an interesting single malt that might be interested in making your waffle iron's general aquaintance, perhaps. Aged in bourbon barrels and finished in madeira casks. Tipple word score close enough?

(TXT to Rhys) Sparrow: Yeah, that'll score.

(TXT to Rhys) Sparrow: First, a quick preface.

(TXT to Rhys) Sparrow: I am entirely confident in my capacity to stun a crowd and lay a pretty girl flat when I gotta.

(TXT to Rhys) Sparrow: Do not mistake what I am about to say for any disbelief in my own capability.

(TXT to Rhys) Sparrow: But my opponent has two very important things going for her.

(TXT to Rhys) Sparrow: First, pretty sure she trains with the gym owner and might know a few tricks I don't.

(TXT to Rhys) Sparrow: Second, and more importantly? She's more invested in the outcome than I am 😉

(TXT to Rhys) Sparrow: That's where I'd put my money if I didn't love myself so damned much.

(TXT to Sparrow) Rhys: Important insights! The whisky and I thank you. How'd you end up in this particular charitable endeavour, anyway?

(TXT to Rhys) Sparrow: People don't know when to say no to me.

(TXT to Rhys) Sparrow: Goaded my opponent until she decided we needed to settle this debate once and for all. She tossed out what might've been a joke. I made it a reality.

(TXT to Rhys) Sparrow: But she might've been looking for an excuse to get me in a bikini.

(TXT to Sparrow) Rhys: Was about to say we live right by a beach for that, but it IS December. Jello probably is the smarter gambit here.

(TXT to Rhys) Sparrow: Some people are impatient!

(TXT to Rhys) Sparrow: I might be one of 'em, but figure waffles and whiskey in good company are worth waiting for.

(TXT to Sparrow) Rhys: Anything else I ought to bring? Initial W not mandatory.

(TXT to Rhys) Sparrow: Willingness to answer whatever questions I might ask?

(TXT to Rhys) Sparrow: General gameness.

(TXT to Sparrow) Rhys: I'm not sure which store they sell that at.

(TXT to Sparrow) Rhys: Actually, it might be the liquor store, come to think of it.

(TXT to Rhys) Sparrow: I'll sharpen up my smile in case the whiskey doesn't do the trick.

(TXT to Sparrow) Rhys: Ah, you know your weaponry.

(TXT to Rhys) Sparrow: I know what works for me. Easier if you come unarmed, but I can be pretty disarming when I gotta.

(TXT to Sparrow) Rhys: It's always easier when people come unarmed. Unless they're on your side. Or you need them to carry something.

(TXT to Rhys) Sparrow: Are you on my side?

(TXT to Sparrow) Rhys: Might depend on the battle, but I don't regularly bring whiskey to the enemy.

(TXT to Sparrow) Rhys: Definitely not the good stuff.

(TXT to Rhys) Sparrow: Good. Never really been one of those fall for the enemy sorts.

(TXT to Sparrow) Rhys: Wise. If movies have taught me anything, that tends to get a person killed in the last act.

(TXT to Rhys) Sparrow: Psh. Never been afraid of a little death either. Just find it easier to like people I actually like 😉

(TXT to Rhys) Sparrow: Whatcha like on your waffles?

(TXT to Sparrow) Rhys: Being afraid of a little death would make life a lot less fun. I say save the avoidance for the big one. 😉

(TXT to Sparrow) Rhys: Maple syrup and bacon works surprisingly well. Also the syrup alone. And fruit and whipped cream's always a classic. I'm fairly waffle-flexible, really. Got a fave?

(TXT to Rhys) Sparrow: The last act, as it were.

(TXT to Rhys) Sparrow: I like fruit. Something a little jammy that'll get stuck in the nooks. Apricot. Or black currant maybe.

(TXT to Sparrow) Rhys: Pretty sure I've never had black currant waffles, actually.

(TXT to Rhys) Sparrow: That solves that 😉

(TXT to Sparrow) Rhys: I do believe we have ourselves a plan! Let me know when the Jello releases you and we'll see if we can nail it to the wall.

(TXT to Rhys) Sparrow: You've got a way with words, Flufftail. I'll definitely letcha know.

(TXT to Sparrow) Rhys: I do my best, Ms. Jones. More words soon.