2019-06-17 - Drunk Texting is the New Thing

(TXT to Ruiz) Dahlia:Why did you have to come here?

(TXT to Ruiz) Dahlia: Did you do it on purpose?

(TXT to Dahlia) Ruiz: Dahlia?

(TXT to Ruiz) Dahlia: Obviously. Answer me.

(TXT to Dahlia) Ruiz: I believe I already answered this question. I was transferred here. I assure you it was not out of any petty desire to fuck with you.

(TXT to Ruiz) Dahlia: Are you sure?

(TXT to Ruiz) Dahlia: No. Don't answer that.

(TXT to Ruiz) Dahlia: Do you hate me?

(TXT to Dahlia) Ruiz: Hate you? why would I hate you?

(TXT to Ruiz) Dahlia: I dunno. Sometimes I think I hated you. But I don't think I did.

(TXT to Ruiz) Dahlia: Just hated that we were bad together.

(TXT to Dahlia) Ruiz: It wasn't all bad. the sex was.. alucinante.

(TXT to Ruiz) Dahlia: That's one word for it.

(TXT to Ruiz) Dahlia: But when we weren't fucking we were fighting .

(TXT to Ruiz) Dahlia: Best sex of my life though.

(TXT to Dahlia) Ruiz: I seem to recall we were perfectly capable of doing both at once.

(TXT to Ruiz) Dahlia: True.

(TXT to Ruiz) Dahlia: Like when you were in town for that conference and we got into it about that whore that was checking you out.

(TXT to Dahlia) Ruiz: She wasn't a whore. and I didn't sleep with her.

(TXT to Ruiz) Dahlia: She was probably a whore.

(TXT to Ruiz) Dahlia: Actually. Wasn't she another officer?

(TXT to Ruiz) Dahlia: Doesn't matter. Being in blue doesn't make you not a whore.

(TXT to Dahlia) Ruiz: I'm telling you she wasn't a fucking whore.

(TXT to Ruiz) Dahlia: Because you knew her so well right?

(TXT to Dahlia) Ruiz: Why are you getting into it with me over ancient history, anyway?

(TXT to Ruiz) Dahlia: You're the one defending some rando.

(TXT to Ruiz) Dahlia: Also I shouldn't have had the third beer. Is it too late to Uber?

(TXT to Dahlia) Ruiz: Are you drunk texting me?

(TXT to Ruiz) Dahlia: What? No.

(TXT to Ruiz) Dahlia: I'm not drunk. I'm tipsy. At best .

(TXT to Ruiz) Dahlia: and I'm going to hate myself in the morning when I read this probably.

(TXT to Dahlia) Ruiz:Do you need me to call you an Uber?

(TXT to Ruiz) Dahlia: No. I don't need you. I can do it.

(TXT to Ruiz) Dahlia: There. I did it.

(TXT to Ruiz) Dahlia: The bartender did it.

(TXT to Dahlia) Ruiz:Good. let me know when you get home.

(TXT to Ruiz) Dahlia: (about 30 minutes later) Home.

(TXT to Ruiz) Dahlia: But she was totally a whore.

(TXT to Ruiz) Dahlia: (The Next Morning) So, we can just agree to delete that entire conversation and never talk about it again right?