2019-07-06 - Nerd, Meet Houseboat

Jessica's houseboat is more house than boat. What looks to be a large shack sitting on a broad raft, it is not made for the high seas and would probably have trouble puttering around the bay. But it's home, and Jessica is very proud of it. Moored close to the shore, it is reached via an old pier...or a leap from the shore to the deck.

The stern of the boat has a small area where people can relax on lounge chairs and use a gas powered barbeque to cook. A sliding glass door leads into the house proper; a living room with attached kitchen, a single bedroom beyond that, bathroom down a few stairs into the hull. A small cabin for using the boat part of the houseboat is located at the bow - Jessica usually dries her laundry in there.

Jessica greets her guests with a smile and a glass of wine. No time to waste! She is dressed in jeans and a grey sweatshirt, barefoot. "Come on in. Make yourselves at home." Harper at least knows her way around. A three seater couch is in front of the entertainment unit. A coffee table with nibblies and a bottle of wine in front of the seating.

Harper arrived all casual-summer evening in a sleeveless blue blouse tied at her waist with a white above-the-knee skirt, and a dark denim jacket slung over one arm for when the sun goes down and the temperature plummets. (outfit, not pb: https://www.pinterest.com/pin/AU0aQKUmJbnONToPrDwitITChiEZFQL8hXJt39MDcZC-ZzUGzOQ3hfU/ ) As usual she brings dessert and this time it's in a pastry box that looks as though it might have come from the new patisserie that so recently opened. It's a traditional French fruit tart with a buttery shortbread crust, a French custard creme, topped with slices of glazed fresh fruit adorning it like a rainbow. ( https://www.pinterest.com/pin/38139928079879531/ ) She traipses down the pier with box and jacket, her sandaled feet neither stompy nor quiet. She just lets herself in, as is usual. "Lucy," she calls. "I'm home." She happily exchanges the tart for a glass of wine, knowing that Jessica will offer the bug spray when they go outside. "Tell me you made food, or else I might eat that whole tart myself." She looks around for one of the many other potential people Jessica may have invited over this evening. You never know. "Hey, I gotta put this song on. But first," stage whisper. "-- are there any billionaires aboard, Cap'n? And have you been navigating recently? Dish, scoop, tell me everything." She does spy around to see if anyone else is there before heading for Jessica's sound system to plug in her phone. "We need some mood music." The music that comes on, loudly, is a live recording from James Taylor's Greatest Hits called 'Steamroller'. ( https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RxbwrBmdLQU&list=RDRxbwrBmdLQU&start_radio=1 ) Growly blues come over the speakers. She starts singing along to Jessica. "Well I'm a steamroller, baby. I'm gonna roll all over you..." She does her best off-key rendition of one of many theme songs for the high school besties. "Well I'm a -- well I'm a cement mixer, baby ..." The music rolls out over the water unless Jessica makes Harper turn it down.

Harper's ipod must be on a list of live music. Because after it finishes playing the James Taylor, some live Alicia Keyes comes on. ( https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=obkrMiyDrbs&list=RDRxbwrBmdLQU&index=2 )

"Hey, Ricardo" Jessica replies to Harper's arrival. "How was the bongo beating today? And of course I'm cooking" gasps Jessica. The very thought she wouldn't be. That would be that delightful aroma emanating from the stove and oven. "Is that from that new pastry shop?" she asks with a nod to the box. "I will make no comment about your desire to eat tarts. I didn't think you leaned that way" she winks to her old friend before returning to watch the cooking food.

Jessica laughs at the blast of loud music. "What mood is that putting you in exactly?" Turn it down? Never. Not until the neighbors complain...twice. Jessica even gets a little groove on. Dancing as best she can to the blues. "No billionaires. And you do know that a three hour cruise in this baby would get you about ten feet. No Harper's Island here." Her brow furrows. "Wasn't there a TV show called 'Harper's Island' that was about a serial killer? Hmm...small world. Hopefully Kevin is coming. How spicy do you think he likes things? Though your outfit is probably more spice than most can handle."

Now see, there's a difficulty with accepting an invitation. Do you dress to impress or for comfort. Evidently, Kevin has made some attempt to split the difference, with a pale blue button-up shirt, one button at the collar undone, the sleeves rolled up against the warmth of the summer evening. Khaki pants with a faint crease, and brown loafers complete the look. It's business-casual-y with a summer bent. He's also got a tall, two-bottle gift bag on his left hand and a six pack of glass bottles of Mexican Coke in his right hand. As he descends the pier -- leaping leaves a very wrong impression if you miss. "Ahoy the... house-boat." Flashing a bright grin, he adds, "Howdy, ladies. Lovely ship you've got." Adding a little cheese to his grin, he adds, "Lovely ship for lovely ladies."

Harper's singing near the stereo as if her wine glass were a microphone, blissfully off key, herself. Now and then she'll answer something Jessica has said. "Well, whatever it is, it smells amazing." She nods while singing. Yep, from the new shop. "When it involves shortbread, cream custard and fresh fruit, I totally lean that way," she answers easily. "The right one," Harper answers of which mood the music is putting her in. Jessica knows very well that one glass of wine does to Harper what four or five would do to anyone else. Hence the wine nursing: a little sip now and then. Harper beams at Jessica at the response to turning it down and blues-es around the living area singing while Jessica finishes up her amazing cooking , her jacket tossed to the arm of the sofa. "There's a reason they call it a house-boat and not a boat-house," she answers, as if the logic to that statement is apparent. "I wasn't going to ask for any cruising. Just some food and fun. Is that so wrong?" She arches her brows at the statement about her namesake television show being about a serial killer. "Oh, Kevin's coming?" Harper glances down at what she's wearing to make sure she passes muster only to look up to see the man arriving far more dressy than she's seen him before. "Ahoy, yourself, Walters. First Mate's permission to come aboard." The last cheesy comment earns him an up-tipping of her eyes. "Did someone switch the reporter-Kevin with the schmoozy one?" She does, however, offer the man a smile, eventually.

"Welcome to the U.S.S. Honeybuns" Jessica smiles to Kevin as he arrives looking dapper and sounding snapper. She looks to Harper in agreement about who is this strange creature that has taken over Kevin's body. "Should we ask him to strip straightaway, Harpo?" A glass of wine is handed over to Kevin in return for what he has brought along. "You shouldn't have...but I'm glad you did. Take a load off, Kevin. Sing. Dance. Make merry. Dinner will be served soon and then we can gossip while watching a flick. 'The Notebook' good for you, Kevin." A pause before she grins. "I'm kidding. Do you want to show Kevin around, Harpo?" Jessica suggests in her casual 'get them together' way.

Kevin says, "Nope!" Kevin responds cheerfully to Harper's question, "Same Kevin. I just schmooze when I'm nervous." Which he admits cheerfully and then shrugs, "It'll wear off quick enough." He steps aboard the houseboat, only to freeze as Jessica names it, "U.S.S. Honeybuns? No one ever told me this was a government vessel." Grinning crookedly, he shrugs, "I have to warn you, it takes a lot of singles to get me to go the full monty. But I also brought wine, and I didn't know what dinner was, but I figured rum and Coke would go well with pretty much anything." Beat pause, "Even 'The Notebook.'" He offers out the drinks to the nearest empty counter space, then glances between the two women, "Also, I've got to warn you, I've got a mean bossa nova, but my salsa's pretty gringo.""

"Sure," Harpo answers Jessica brightly. She'll give him the tour, alright. She points sternward: "Outside seating." She points to the couch, "Comfy room." She points kitchen-ward: "Kitchen." She points toward the stairs that lead the head: "Bathroom." Finally she points in the direction of the door to Jessica's bedroom: "Where the magic happens." She smiles at Kevin after he's offloaded his beverage offerings and does a Vanna without spilling her wine. "Did you enjoy your tour?" Then she steps forward to reach up and pat a burly shoulder gently a few times. "Don't be nervous. We'll be gentle. Until Jessica's had her third glass of wine. Then all bets are off." She steps back out of his space and takes a sip of her wine. The full monty, huh? Harper looks intrigued. "No no no. NOT The Notebook. Pleeeeeease, no. Something spy-ish or action-y, please. I want to either talk in code or make fun of stunts." That mostly to Jessica. "You're a dancer, Kevin? Curiouser and Curiouser."

"The only magic that happens in there is that people disappear" Jessica deadpans about her bedroom. "Even before they get in there" she adds. "Thanks for giving him the tour. I hope you charged a lot for all that time you spent." A roll of her eyes in Kevin's direction. "Does this look like a government vessel? Though, after all the budget cuts... 'U.S.S.' means United Sexy Sisters. Harpo wanted to include 'Seamen' as the middle S but I couldn't swallow that idea. A lot of single women to go the full monty, Kevin? Such a hussy." A wink for her fellow journalist before trying to calm everyone's fears. "Sheesh, do I look like the kind of person who watches 'The Notebook'? Harpo, have a look on Netflix and find something you like. Though, in the meantime, I want to see Kevin bossing the bossa nova."

The Tour has Kevin laughing easily, shaking his head and pointing at one location after another in turn, "Outside, Comfy, Kitchen, Bathroom -- isn't that the Head on a boat? -- and magic show. Got it. Well done. Nicely toured." Looking mock-warily between the women, he nods at Harper's suggestion for the movie choices, "Or old-school, like Hackers. Oh, and yeah, I'm a dancer. An enthusiastically bad dancer." No shame there, but Harper's joke causes him to choke, "Good thing I hadn't started drinking. Would have had a spit-take." His ears color slightly and he shakes his head, reaching in to pull out a bottle of Zaya rum, "Anyone else like rum and Coke? I was totally joking about the bossa nova, by the way. I don't know if I've ever heard a bossa nova. I do a great white-man's-overbite though..."

Harper's smile warms until her brown eyes are sparkling at Kevin's laughter. "Maybe. But this is a 'House-Boat'. So all bets are off." She nods, "I could do old-school. I could do it hard." Looking back to Jessica, Harper warns, "Don't make me finger-gun you. I'll do it." Then she almost looks appalled, almost. "Shush, Jess. Focus on the food and keep the Seamen out of it." She looks back to Kevin and is amused all over again. "Keep beverages away from you or have a towel ready. Check."

"Harpo, don't suppose you have any bossa nova cued up? It sounds like it's time that Kevin learned how to dance" Jessica smirks before a last check of the food. Though it is also her turn to cough when Harper mentions what to keep out of the food. "That's not what you said the last time. And keep the finger guns holstered, they may go off. Okay, foods ready. Sit down and put your bibs on. How hot do you want it, Kevin?" A pause. "The food. Rum and coke sounds good to me. Always goes with a wine. What are we watching, Harpo?"

Kevin holds his hands up at the accusations of finger-gun-firing, "Why do I feel like that's going to be a thing? Like, calling me out whenever I toss some finger-guns out there." Coughing, he shakes his head, "I don't usually spit-take. But I mean, that had to be the right line after a swallow joke, right?" Looking to Jessica, he adds, "Wait, do you really know how to bossa nova? That's really cool." Starting to mix some relatively light rum and cokes, he chuckles at the question about heat, shifting a little, "I mean... I'm not full gringo, but I'm like a... two star sort of guy."

"I want to see what Kevin picks," Harper answers firmly to the role of film selection. Also to Jessica, "Be kind to my delicate taste buds please." The librarian knows how spicy Jessica's food can get. "I don't even know that I could even identify a bossa nova. Is that the kind on the old Casio keyboard samples?" Then Harper looks Kevin up and down. "He's going to have to teach us," she answers kitchen-ward. "I'll ditch my wine and switch over to a rum and coke. He brought the cane sugar kind." To Kevin, "Because it is a thing." He goes there. He just takes it one step further. "Well, then we know that you don't swallow. It's a valid piece of information." She heads for food, following the delicious smells.

"What swallow joke?" It's a wonder that a halo doesn't appear over Jessica's head along with a burst of Heavenly chorus. She must have missed it. "Bossa Nova is actually a style of music rather than a dance. You can samba to it. Or throw your arms in the air like you just don't care. And, um, half-Latinx, of course I can dance. Yes, it is a preset on the Casio. Okay, I'll lower the spice levels tonight. Harpo, back to the couch, I'll bring it over. Looks like you get to choose the movie, Kevin. Both of you sit down and let me fuss over you."

So Jessica knows her dancing, clearly. "Looks like you're dancing with Jess," Harper announces easily to Kevin. "I'll take embarrassing photos. It'll be fun." Harper pivots and heads back into the living room space and takes a seat on the sofa. "When she gets like this, you just have to let her do what she wants. It's for the best." She pats a couch cushion consolingly as if in invitation. When he sits, Harper will hand over the remote to Kevin, the music from her phone long past.

"Wait, my pick?" Kevin has a deer-in-the-headlines moment, looking around, "Uh... I mean... how about... Sneakers? Spy stuff and old-school? It's probably up on Netflix." He blushes and shrugs at the comment about him not swallowing, "I'm uh... not exactly in that kind of market." Taking a healthy swig of his rum and coke and handing the second to Jessica, he points to her, letting the halo-moment past, "There's the lowdown. And the skills behind it. At least you're claiming them. I suppose we'll have to see if they hold up." He moves over toward the couch with Harper's drink, offering it out too and receiving the remote in return, "I mean, isn't that what a guy's supposed to do anyhow? What he's told?" He perches on the corner of the couch a moment, leaning one butt-cheek on it, "Am I dancing or sitting?"

"Sit, Kevin. We have food." Jessica is indeed serving it up. "Costillitas on a rice bed" she announces. "And for those of you who have not eaten the best food in the world. Costillitas are baby back ribs with a special sauce. Sweet and tangy. And I've kept the spices out of it." She brings over the plates and nods to the center of the couch. "You're in the middle, Kevin. You get to be the meat in a hot sandwich." A little wiggle of her eyebrows while handing out the food. "'Sneakers' sounds good. Is that the one with Dan Aykroyd? And Harpo brought dessert because she is the best damn friend anyone could have." Once their food is handed out, she's back to grab hers before joining them on the couch. "So, Harpo, what's the latest goss?"

"Yep." Kevin's pick, Harper nods. Then she agrees quite happily to Sneakers. I mean, Robert Redford. You can't go wrong there. Harper's not probably as accustomed to seeing Kevin blush as Jessica may be so she watches him thoughtfully, intrigued, which likely doesn't help with said blushing. She seems to be in agreement with Kevin's verdict on Jessica's dance knowledge as well. The librarian accepts the drink from him with a small 'Thanks' and takes a tentative sip. Regarding what guys are supposed to do, Harper replies, "It's an impossible task for a guy, really, figuring out how much to do as he's told and how much to take the lead. I don't envy your gender." The words seem sincere, though Harper's brown eyes do sparkle. Does he dance or sit? "She'll tell you." Now comes the quirking smile, as if her moments-earlier commiseration were completely evaporated. Harper leans down to set her drink to the right of her foot on the floor and takes the plate from Jessica with a beatific smile. "Looks magnificent, Jess. Thank you." And then, "You know it." to who's the best damn friend. "Well," Harper begins, all hushed ending up leaning across Kevin when he sits where he is directed. , "I hear there's a schmoozy version of Kevin, that reporter guy, who can dance. I mean, no teeshirt, nice duds. He brings the good Coke. And he doesn't swallow."

Kevin pops down in the middle of the couch, next to Harper, when he's bid to sit down. Apparently he assumed how that was going to work, "I've never heard of..." and then Jessica explains the meal, and he gives a little, "Ooooh. That sounds great." He blushes again as he's called the meat in the hot sandwich, coughing on a sip of his drink. "Wow. Down the wrong tube, sorry." Pause. "And yeah. Dan Aykroyd, Robert Redford, Sidney Poitier, River Phoenix, Mary MacDonnall, David Straitharn... pretty much everyone awesome from way back when." That's easier to talk about. And when he looks back to Harper when she's cued for the latest gossip. "Waitwaitwait... I've got a t-shirt on. Or, I mean, an a-shirt at least. And of course I bring the good Coke. Anything less is a waste of sugar." Then he pauses again, "And is not swallowing a good thing for a guy? I mean..."

"He doesn't swallow? Hmm...that's rather selfish of him" Jessica muses over Kevin to Harper. "Though I heard he's only into blondes. Well, not as much into them as he'd like to be, but that's where his interests lie." A shrug. "Nothing wrong with that though, right? Everyone has their own thing. What do you think, Kevin?" A sip of her drink before she starts on her food as the movie starts up. "Kevin has soooo many t-shirts" she nods to Harper. "Though he may not know his size since they're all soooo tight on that muscled torso of his." Jessica fans her face with her hand. "Sorry, have a bit of spice in my food. It's been ages since I saw this movie. Oh, movie rules on the 'Honeybuns', Kevin. Talk as much as you like...especially if it's gossip. And you are allowed to mock without any repercussions. Especially mock the movie if it deserves it, since they won't even know we insulted them. But...no work talk. Unless we're talking about who Harpo has picked up at the library lately. Though if we talk about that, I hope it's a long movie."

Harper gives Kevin a closer up smile as he sits. She listens to the list of characters, nodding as she recognizes some but didn't know the list by heart like Kevin did. Sideglance before she takes her first bite, then groans and tells Jessica again all over how good the food is. Jess, at least, knows that Harper tends to pick at food, translating to a meaningful compliment. Kevin interrupts her gossip and she tips her head to look from Jessica to him. "Are you wearing a graphic tee under that button down? I'm betting not. And I didn't say you were shirtless, though you know, we are on a house boat." Because that makes a difference. Sure it does. "That was nearly all complimentary gossip, Kevin. Can't you just agree and then offer something interesting up of your own?" Play well with others is the tease, but the smile never quite leaves Harper's face, whether ghosting at the corners of her lips or sparkling in her brown eyes. To Jessica, over Kevin. "I know, right?" She listens, eating a bit more food as Jess shares her version. "I heard he likes goats." Harper lets Jessica give the rules on house-boat night. Then she murmurs with a suggestive tone, "I wouldn't say there's no action at the library." Then she adds faintly, "But there isn't. That sort of thing leaves the books all messy."

"Just because I check out one ass," which Kevin claimed he wasn't doing, "doesn't mean I have a type. You've both got great asses too." Well, that's probably more than he wants to say. He takes another big slug of his drink, patting his chest a little self-consciously and blushing brightly. Covering that up, he responds, "Oh good. I'm good with talking through movies. Talking's good. But wait, you want to mock Sneakers? I didn't know this was MST3K or I would have picked Get Smart or something." Looking back to Harper, he starts to push food around, gathering up a big fork-full, "You mean you don't try the Marian the Librarian routine? The innocent librarian waiting to whip off the glasses," the ones she doesn't wear, "and shake out your hair, knock books off the stacks? I thought that was the idea of being a librarian? Wait, do you really like books? Now that's good gossip."

"Not sure we want to go shirtless on his first time here, Harpo, his mind may break" Jessica teases. "She's kidding, Kevin. We'd only go shirtless if we were wearing bikinis, and it's not bikini weather just yet. Goats? Do you think we could get a goat to wear a bikini, Harpo? Or would it be a baa-kini?" How much has she had to drink? A grin as Kevin describes his librarian fantasies. "Oh, Harpo is all that and more. She inspires all kinds of reading from the members. How many copies of 'The Joy of Sex' have you had to replace, Harpo?" Her brow furrows. "And a lot of copies of 'Watership Down' too for some reason. We live in a weird city." At Kevin's announcement they have great asses, her eyes pop open wide. "Hear that?" she grins to Harper, "He did check out Magnolia's ass." Another mouthful of food. "We might not mock 'Sneakers', just saying you can if you want."

Harper's laughter is quiet and inclusive. "Don't mush my ass together with other asses. Frankly that just makes it insulting." Poor Kevin. She reaches over and pats Kevin's chest in the same spot he just patted. "You need the Heimlich, or are your tubes in order?" Then she answers, "I can't really mock Redford. It's a personal rule. But I'll mock the old technology." Kevin inquires about her sexy-librarian alter-ego. "I'll have you know that I do have glasses. For reading. They're black. And I actually do date now and then. So you have no need to worry over my destitute spinster life. Why, someone had his hands all over me just a couple weeks ago. I ghosted him, but it wasn't easy." She shudders. Not a good memory.

"I don't 'shake out my hair'," she argues with mock stuffiness. "And why would I ever knock books off the stacks? That's just bad for everyone involved." She meets Kevin's eyes with her own and solemnly inquires, "Are you about to say 'then why don't you marry them', Kevin Walters?" Pause. Beat. Pause. "I don't know," Harper replies to Jessica. "It was pretty hot today." Harper spills out a laugh at the baa-kini joke. "i don't mess with the patrons," she counters mock-primly. "It wouldn't be proper." The Joy of Sex? "More of the Kama Sutra, actually. And, for some reason, 'Pat the Bunny'. I'm not sure why." She just nods emphatically as she takes another bite of Jessica's incredible dinner at the commentary about the city. "A horrific, nightmarish, secretive, dangerous, poorly organized city." Whatever that means. She reaches down to pick up her R&C and takes a long drink of it. Jessica may have gone light on the spices, but they still get to Harper enough that liquid is needed regularly. "We'd have to take away his guy-card if he didn't check it out, really, if you think about it."

Kevin's chest is patted, and he blushes again, only to freeze, "Wait, why are we putting a bikini on a goat? And do members really read besides Braille? And bunnies, really?" Many questions, apparently, all very confused. Pointing to Harper, he confirms, "I'm a dude, I check out every woman's ass, at least to see if it's worthy of being checked out. I can't help it, it's in my DNA. Or my chromosomes, or something." He eats readily between comments, "And mushing asses together is a party, isn't it? I mean, my ass is mushed between yours and yours. And I'm not giving any guff for wearing glasses. They're a pain in the ass, but I mean... they're part of who you are." Wincing lightly, he adds, "And ouch. Ghosting -- and having to ghost -- sucks. I would never make a joke like that, by the way," he says, biting back exactly that joke. "That's way good Coasta-yeetas." Definitely a gringo.

"She does have glasses" Jessica nods, "And damn sexy she is when she wears them. Though she's sexy all the time. Ghosted?" Someone isn't hip with all the latest terms. "I guess you're right about that, Harpo. If he hadn't checked out her ass then it would be odd. Heck, even I checked out her ass." She wonders if she should have said that but shrugs off her concern. Jessica's with friends. "If we were allowed to talk work I'd be saying quite a lot of things about this city after recent events. But we're watching a movie and saying silly things instead." A shrug for Kevin. "I dunno, why are you putting a bikini on a goat? Though you really shouldn't check out every girl's ass, Kevin. We're woke this days, right? Women aren't slabs of meat to judge and objectify." She peers over at Harper. "What are his pecs like? Bet they're firm." The librarian did just pat his chest after all. "Coasta...?" Jessica laughs. "I'm glad you both like them."

Harper leaves the goat-talk to Jessica. The Braille question just soars over her head so she leaves that be as well. She nods sagely to the children's book that most frequently needs to be replaced, as if there were some conspiracy involved. Harper points back at Kevin with an amused expression and nods. "That's what I said. I'm on your side, Walters." Mushing asses. "You have a strange idea of what a party consists of, Kevin. And we're not even close to mushing asses, even if that were true." She dips her chin in agreement to the aggravation of glasses. Ghosting? "He was a jerk who I thought would be a nice guy. He got me to drink too much. Things got out of hand. Luckily an old friend came and rescued me. But it was pretty horrid there for awhile. I just wanted to have a little fun." She trails off, looking to the middle distance for a moment, before shaking her head and going back to her plate for another bite. "Yep, Jess. They're still amazing," she agrees. Half a glass of wine and half a R&C and Harper's waxing on about dates gone bad. She won't be happy about that later. Harper offers a glance of appreciation to Jessica for support. She nods sagely about ass-checking-out. Harper pays some attention to the movie, remarks on their communication technology with amusement. "I didn't cop a feel," Harper apologizes to Jessica.

Kevin looks utterly confused about the goat-bikini, shaking his head slightly, "Someone else said it first!" He points from Jessica to Harper and back again. "I can totally check out every woman's ass, as long as they don't see it. Now if I say or do anything about, I'm horrible." The comment about his pecs has him covering his chest with one forearm, but even as he starts to laugh, Harper is telling her story, and he ruffles up his metaphorical feathers, "What the hell? Why do assholes like that have to be out there? I mean, seriously. What gives guys ideas like that? Me, I don't think it's any shadowy cabal or anything," which is saying something, coming from him, "but the patriarchy definitely has a vested interest in keeping women down. Because otherwise, the old white guys would lose power, because there are enough women to totally do something about them if you all got together."

"Wait. What? Someone tried to get you drunk and take advantage of you?" Jessica is not a happy camper now. "Who were they? I will plaster their name all over the gazette as a warning to the world. Seriously. We need to let people know about this jerk. Or asshole, as Kevin puts it so well." She nods to her fellow journo. "Yeah, I know exactly how the patriarchy would like women down. I want to know who it was, Harper. They will not go unpunished." The Latina is boiling mad. But, thankfully, there are goats to still talk about. "So, you heard someone else talk about goats in bikinis, Kevin, and thought it was a good idea?" A shake of her head. "It was probably the guy who bothered Harpo. He definitely sounds like a goat f... oops...spilled some food." She grabs her napkin to dab at some sauce on her sweatshirt. "So, you've checked out our asses, Kevin? And you didn't think anything else?" She's only teasing.

Harper holds up the hand not busy with her food in an I'm-innocent gesture when pointed to about bikini'd goats. Then she's nodding along with Kevin's statement about ass-watching as though she agrees until the end of his statement, at which point she swallows her bite quickly and reaches for her drink take a swift swallow before arguing, "There are lots of things you can say or do without getting into trouble." She disagrees with almost too-strong a counter-point. "I mean, you can compliment her clothing, you can smile nicely without looking like a pervert, you can offer to get the door for her or reach something -- uh -- heavy on a tall shelf." What can she say? Harper has some opinions steeped in tradition. Not all, but it's all in the application of said traditions, in the librarian's mind.

Harper seems to appreciate the ruffling from both Kevin and from Jessica about her horrible date. She shrugs in a little what-can-you-do manner and says, "Live and learn. We all have to deal with jerks now and then. I'd prefer not to be pawed at and slobbered on by them, but then I could have been better at vetting my date in the first place. No, no no no. I'm not taking the blame for his crappy behavior, and men and women should both be accountable for their actions. The dating scene isn't the easiest to navigate." To Kevin she frowns a little, "You saying women have it coming because we don't rise up, rise up?" Hamilton reference. Yo yo yo!

Harper returns her attention to Jessica. "I'm not revealing his name because first of all you would literally kill him and have to go to jail, and secondly he's not from here, so you'd have a hard time finding him anyway. It's okay. Nicholas Granholm came and rescued me. He drove me home." She leans forward and looks at Jessica. "You know, my 'little brother'? He's an EMT now. Everyone has stories about why he won't let anyone in his house? Me, I've told him I'm pretty sure he's got a Silence-of-the-Lambs thing going on. " And by 'little brother' Harper means the brother she never had, not an actual relative. "Middle schooler who used to hang out in the library when we were in high school? Yeah, when he isn't working, he's a good guy to have to call when a date goes wrong." Harper shoots Jess an appreciative look for the promised-violence on her behalf once again and finally admits, "His name was Fred. If you see an out-of-towner named Fred who looks like a jerk, you punch him in the nose."

Then Harper settles back with a roll of quiet laughter as Kevin gets put on the proverbial hot seat regarding their asses. Poor guy. No good answers there for him to give. She almost feels sorry for him. But instead she reaches for her drink and finishes it off, then stands with her plate and glass in one hand, offering to take plates, retrieve food, or refill glasses for the other two after a suspenseful scene in the movie where Redford looks mighty fine.

Kevin lets the goats in bikinis thread go whipping past, although he chuckles a little at Harper's list of things he can still do, "Yeah. Looking and talking nicely is usually safe." Beat pause, "That's a real nice blouse, by the way." His grin goes broad and crooked, even if he's letting it fade a moment later, "You know you've got an ace reporter for a best friend, right?" He gestures across him to Jessica, then holds up his hands a little defensively, leaving his plate balanced precariously on his knees, "I'm not saying women have it coming for anything." He stops, blushes a little, and adds, "There's a dirty joke there, but I'm pretty sure this isn't a joking matter. I'm just saying that old white dudes are working overtime behind the scenes to make sure that minorities and women don't get what's theirs." And then he's on the hot seat again, his head whipping back to Jessica, "Oh no. Sorry. That's definitely not a one-drink sort of conversation. In fact, I'm pretty sure there isn't an amount of drinks that will make me think I can trade jabs with both of you at once."

Jessica nods along to Harper's list of possible interactions between men and women. Though the tall shelf one gets a curious look; Harper has been reading those 'Mills and Boon' romances again. Though when Kevin compliments the librarian on her clothing...hello! She smiles at that before a wiggle of her eyebrows to her friend. Though something else in Harper's expression when she talks of her date savior has Jessica nodding once in understanding.

"Fred from out of town. Got it. I think I will do a knee rather than the punch though. I doubt there is anything inside his head that could be damaged. I'd rather attack his brain" Jessica explains. Anyone called Fred, now needs to fear for their future children. "This is why, when it comes to the dating scene, I'm the understudy. Never get to go on...and all the better for it. Miss out on the humiliation of a poor performance." A pause. "How much have I drunk? I remember Nicholas. He's a serial killer? Hmm...I better check on him."

Poor Kevin. "He doesn't want to talk about our asses because he doesn't like them" Jessica stage whispers over to Harper. "Hey, always say the dirty joke, Kevin. It's a rule on these nights. Ace reporter?" That praise has her surprised...and blushing. "Hey, we don't talk about work, remember." She hands over her plate to Harper. "Dessert time? So...who are they robbing in this movie?"

Harper's brown eyes positively twinkle with the laughter she contains at Kevin's compliment. "Thank you, Kevin," she replies formally. "So nice of you to notice. Here, let me get you another drink." Finished or not she's grabbing his drink unless he puts up a fight in which case here's hoping said drink isn't spilled. Her lips quirk as she tries not to smile at the missing dirty joke as well. Tipsy Harper is tipsy. And yes, that's all it takes for the lightweight. She nods sagely to the 'compliment' Jessica is paid, knowing full well -- or thinking she does -- that it's an oblique ass compliment. "Damn right she is. Gets that ass right out there and scoops the stories."

Harper laughs at Jessica's plans for this spurious Fred-fellow. "I love you, Jess." Then, "Accused serial killer. Never convicted. And a good guy, really, otherwise." Harper just stops to enjoy the beauty that is her best friend blushing. "Point for Kevin," she announces. Though what the game is and what the score is -- well, those are less apparent. She'll take plates, refill plates, refill drinks. To the kitchen! She returns with refilled drinks for everyone and dessert plates of fruit tart which she hands out or returns to the kitchen as necessary.

"And yes, that's a very nice sweatshirt, Jessica." Hah! Kevin is only a little behind on that. Jessica's suggestion of her probably attack vector has Kevin squeezing his knees together, pointing down, "Not all of us think with that, by the way." Beat pause, "Only most." He gives up his drink without a fight, but then the accusation of not liking the asses present has Kevin sputtering, gesticulating wildly enough to try to get across, 'I just said...' that he has to catch his plate to keep it from falling off his knees. "I would've said the joke, if I could make it work. And yes, that's what he said." The question about the movie has him answering quickly, "Ben -- " he cuts himself off from spoilers, "Um... spoooooky scientists and government types." Right. Not Sir Ben Kingsley at all. "Point to me! I won't be shut out! Woohoo!" He might be getting a little too into the celebration, although it fades away to laughter, "Thank you," he chirps as his drink is returned. "I just love all the characters in this movie. They're all so 3-D. Before everything got all completely taken over by marketing departments."

The reporter compliment from Kevin was also an ass compliment? Harper is so smart! And, of course, that gets Jessica blushing again. At least until he compliments her stained sweatshirt. She has to laugh at that and give Kevin a consoling pat of his leg. "Too much" she grins before keeping an eye on Harper to make sure she doesn't fall over.

"And I love you too, Harpo. Well, as long as he was never convicted, then everything is fine. Right?" Jessica teases before frowning at her friend. "But he lost the point for complimenting my sweatshirt" she points out before her gaze is back on Kevin. "Did you just ruin the movie for me?" A dramatic sigh and shake of her head. "Knock another point off, Harpo. And when it comes to dirty jokes, just tell them. We'll fit them into the narrative...as the actress said to the bishop. Ooh, tart. Who doesn't want to eat tarts all night?"

"I think so too," calls Harper from the kitchen. "In the realm of sweatshirts it's positively sexy." She misses the topic of what men think with while slicing tart. "I love this movie," is the agreement from Harper. "You chose wisely." Drinks and desserts are delivered as needed. Harper takes a risk and brings another J&C for herself. Whether she'll drink it is another matter entirely. She sinks to her end of the sofa into the comfy cushion. "What'd I miss? They didn't get to the part where --" Kevin avoids spoilers, so Harper does too. Harper scoffs a little scoff. "Marketing. Such sell-outs." Sell-to's?

To Jessica regarding losing a point. "Nope. He loses half a point, but we round up. Still a point." She leans around Kevin to peer at her friend. "He didn't ruin it for you. Did he ruin it for you?" She doesn't want to take points away that were fairly earned. "I do," Harper answers, then gets confused by the negative version of the statement. "Or I don't? Whichever means getting some." Yep, she worded that. She lifts the tart slice up and takes a bite. "Mmmm. To Redford and Kingsley!" She holds the tart slice in the air as if in toast.

"I mean, complimenting clothes was as far as Harper's list allowed." Kevin takes a swig of his refilled drink, and then goes back to cleaning all the food off his plate so that there's room for a tart slice. "So compliments had to be transferred to clothes." He winces as she catches the accidental spoiler, starting to say something only to but cut off by Harper backing him up. "I'm pretty sure that the reason tarts exist is to get eaten right out of their dishes." He sets his plate and fork aside, focusing on tart and drink, "To Redford and Kingsley!" Of course, Dan Aykroyd's character Mother may be a little closer to Kevin's own heart, having a positively illuminated view on the various conspiracies out there. "Wait, am I in the negative already?"

"If you were in the negative, Kevin, we would have thrown you overboard already" Jessica smirks as she raises her tart to 'clink' against Harpers at the toast. Though it is more of a wet slap...and probably drips on Kevin's lap. "Hear that, Harpo. Kevin likes to get at tarts as soon as soon as he can and eat them all up. I mean...not a bad thing, when you think about it." A nod for Kevin as she sits back. "Only compliment clothes if they are complimentable...is that a word? Not just because a woman is wearing some. Honesty is valued above praise. Most of the time."

A laugh at the concept of 'sell-tos'. "Nice, Harpo. "And did you just take his side about the movie?" A gasp as Jessica clutches at her heart. "Such backstabbing...in the front. But I'll forgive you since you like him. You know, if you two need to talk a bit in private..." As private as a houseboat can be. "I can put the headphones on."

When it comes to the stated rules, Kevin is correct. But Harper is quite certain he has the brain for improvisation. She contemplates the statement, the complaint. "Draw," she decides. "With Jess, you could compliment something of hers that's pretty other than her ass. Only because we're talking about asses, so it would sound pretty plastic now." She says this as if Kevin needs prompting, which he very likely does not. But it's apparently ass night on the house-boat, so she plays along. "I think the negative involves keel-hauling, so we'll go with 'not'," Harper replies, official point-keeper.

She grins at Jessica as they essentially say the same thing. Then Harper takes a healthy bite of the fruity-custardy-shortbready goodness and utters a little sound of ecstasy. "This," chew, swallow. "--is good. Next time I visit you at work I'll bring something else from there." Harper offers apology-eyes to Jessica regarding taking sides. "It was an empirical call," no it really wasn't. "I think we can moosh asses right here in the same room," she boldly states.

"Well, I'm not swimming, at least." Kevin accepts, then chuckles at the advice, "I wasn't complimenting the clothes just to provide a compliment. Promise. Besides, it's about how you wear it." He starts in on the tart then, making his own appreciative sounds as he chews. Swallowing, he adds, "I'm pretty sure that we can all sit here on the couch while we finish the movie. I mean, that's what you mean about mooshing asses, right? It's plenty comfy here." He... might be a little oblivious, but something sinks in, "Wait, you think..." he looks from Jessica to Harper and back, flushing up to the ears.

"I think the Honeybuns needs a proper keel before anyone can be hauled across it, though I am willing to give it a go." Jessica is then moaning in agreement about the food. "I am going to have to jog ten miles to use up all these calories. But it's worth it! Make sure you visit more often if you're bringing stuff from this store."

"About how I wear it?" Jessica has to giggle at Kevin's backpedalling, but he does it so sweet. "Couch ass mooshing sounds good to me." A few more bites of pastry paradise before offering the man in the middle a strange look. "Of course we think, Kevin. What's your point?"

Harper is content to enjoy her pastry and let the movie run toward its final act while doing so. Jessica's 'suggestion' and her subtle rebuff hit Kevin with a slight time-delay, so Harper licks the tip of her thumb then reaches to her left hand to pat Kevin reassuringly on the shoulder. "'S'all good, Walters. Don't sweat it." She offers one of her relentlessly warm smiles. "We can all 'think' together."

"Ugh, yes. So much exercise tomorrow, but so worth it." Kevin shakes his head, finishing off the tart and then gathering up his drink again, "Yeah. I mean..." He throws up his hands, "Augh." Rubbing his face with one hand, he mumbles to himself, "So horrible, Kev. Sooooo horrible." Brightening up again, he shrugs at Jessica's question, "I thought that you thought that I thought that..." he stops and opens his mouth, only to stop at Harper's words, "What are we thinking about again?"

"So it was the foreign looking guy all along" Jessica notes about the movie, but won't get her soapbox out tonight. She's probably getting too tipsy for coherent thought. And Harper may be even further along - she has had more than one drink after all. And Kevin is being baffling again with all this thoughts. "I dunno" she replies to his question, "You were the one doing the thinking." She glances between Harper and Kevin, a wicked smile forming on her face. "Harpo, why don't you go exercising with Kevin tomorrow? I know you don't like it but...could you have a cuter teacher? Damn these tarts are good."

"We don't usually have guests here with us on girls-night, Kevin. So, obviously you're now an honorary girl. But the point I was going to make is...umm..." Jessica's brow furrows for a moment. "Oh...yeah...since there is three of us, party games! What do you think, Harpo? 'Spin the Bottle' or 'Truth or Dare'? What's the difference?" She does not have a long history of social events or party games.

Speaking of drinks, Harper's at about two-and-a-half. At this point Jessica holds responsibility for anything the Librarian says or does. "Instead of xenophobic, I like to think the villains are just more interesting and complex. So yeah, the foreign guy. I prefer villains usually -- I mean the smart ones. The well-developed characters with motivations," Harper continues, oblivious to how her words could seem like double-speak. "And foreign guys are usually hot." Along with geeks, rich geeks, and hot geeks. Harper's list is lengthening. "What are we thinking?" Harper asks the question as if she's the first one to make the query or restate the quickly forgotten moment of discomfort and implications about what should or should not take place on the house boat. "Oh, yes. It's fantastic. If we don't finish it, I might take a piece home. But help yourself to seconds." The librarian lifts her R&C to her lips then stops and lifts it to clink against either of the other two's if they are in their hands. "Tarts. Damn good ones."

But then Jessica is elaborating about guests on girls-night and Harper's half leaning across Kevin to hear what Jessica has to say about this super-secret topic. "I don't think he looks much like a girl," she side-eyes Kevin and shakes her head solemnly at Jessica. "Pretty-solidly guy." Games? Harper tries to imagine kissing first one then the other of the occupants on the sofa. "Not enough people to spin any bottles." Truth or Dare? "Harper scrunches up her lips and a little wrinkle mars her brow as she considers that one. "Okay." She leans her shoulder in against Kevin's, half falling into him, half nudging him. "Unless you don't like games, Walters." Brows lift in query.

"I mean, I think that Cosmo was bad because he was a cheater from the start, not because he was foreign-looking. And also because I don't think you get Sir Ben Kingsley and don't give him a super-juicy part." Kevin shrugs a little helplessly as Harper is metaphorically shoved at him once more, and he grins from Jessica to Harper, "I mean, I go in before work pretty much every day. Happy to have more people there. And I'm toootally okay being an honorary girl. Girls just wanna have fun, right? But do you play Spin the Bottle at girls night? I mean, sure, Truth or Dare..." He reclaims his drink to clink against Harper's, then takes another sip. He slips his arm out from between Harper and himself when she leans across to talk to Jessica, stretching it out along the back of the couch instead and rocking into Jessica a little at the nudge, "Oof. I can play. I mean, I'm good with playing a little Truth or Dare. Who goes first?"

"So all those kids at high school who used to mock my ethnicity found me interesting and complex?" Jessica deadpans. "Though I totally get the 'hot' thing." She has to laugh at that, she's never thought highly of herself in that way "I'm totally into tarts. Keep them coming." At Harper's description of Kevin, she considers the meat in the sandwich. "Just because he has muscles on muscles doesn't mean he can't be a girl. I mean, I don't think he is, but there's only one way to be sure." She looks Kevin straight in the eye and says, "You know what I'm talking about. Well? C'mon, we haven't got all night. Do you eat quiche?"

"Harpo and I always have fun. Even when miserable" Jessica has to hide a giggle as Kevin smoothly puts his arm around Harper...well...the part of the couch behind her at least. And with her friend resting on her co-worker's shoulder...so romantic. "Guests go first" Jessica announces. "So, Kev. May I call you Kev? Though I guess I already did." More of her drink to clear her mind. "Where was I? Oh, yeah, on the couch. Okay, Kev, truth or dare?"

Harper hear-hears Kevin's statement about the sort of part one gives to Sir Ben Kingsley. "He's definitely hot." It's a roll. Of what Harper finds 'hot'. This is so not a conversation she'd be having sober. Work out? Gym? Harper wrinkles her nose from where she's nudged-collapsed against Kevin, lifting her glass with a slosh to take another drink. "Mmmmcanesugar. No, gyms aren't for me. Give me a hike in the woods or a snorkel and some flippers any day. But mastering stairs, or doing an elliptical dance, or pumping iron?" She points to herself. "This body's not made for that stuff." The librarian settles in for the time being. Kevin's not quite as uncomfortable as he looks like he might be. Oh glee. Jessica gives Kevin the first lose-lose choice. Harper peers up at the too-close face to watch for his choice. "This is going to be a disaster," she stage whispers, but it's not clear to whom she addresses that stage whisper.

"Yes. Just like the kids used to mock me because I was smart and quiet." Kevin takes another drink, blink-blinking at Jessica's question, "Um? I mean, I eat quiche, but I kind of think that you're trying to ask something else." He winces at Jessica's use of the nickname, "Uh. I... kind of gave up 'Kev' in college." But he nods to Harper, "Cardio's great, whether it's in the gym or not." The stage-whisper causes him to blink and slowly turn back to Jessica, "Um... Truth?" It seems less dangerous right now. He's probably quite right about that. His phone buzzes in his pocket, but he does his best to ignore it for now.

"Oh please, Harpo. Your body is made for anything" Jessica notes before wiggling her eyebrows at Kevin. "She's very flexible. Just saying. And we often go swimming from Honeybuns when the water really warms up. Anytime you want to come for a swim, Kevin, just say the word. Okay, no calling you Kev...but we have to call you something instead of Kevin. Don't worry, we know your real first name is off limits." She does a gesture of zipping up her mouth. "Won't say a word. And I was def asking about quiche. I'm glad you resist the cliche slash dominant paradigm. I never mocked you."

"If we're playing Truth or Dare properly, then of course it will be a disaster" Jessica giggles to Harper before another mouthful of alcoholic drink. "Eww...I bet we know what kind of cardio gets you really pumping, Kevin." Oh how she is going to avoid his gaze the next time they're at work. "Okay. Okay. Truth it is. Hmm. What terrible secret do I want to know?" The buzzing phone gets an annoyed look from the hostess. "Why didn't you invite your girlfriend along? That's not the Truth question. This one is. Start with an easy one. 'Who did you have a crush on in high school?' Jessica is really not good at this game.

So not good at this game. The original question was so much better. What secret does Jessica want to know about Kevin? But she abandons it, does Jessica. Harper uses a hand to shove against Kevin's chest to struggle to push herself up and away from him with some effort, rocking back into her corner of the sofa, pulling skirted knees up to turn to the side and maintain her modesty as she does so. Somehow her drink remains in the glass as she does all this before resting the stout glass atop her upper, bare knee as she watches for the answer. Her drunk brain tries to flip through memories of who was in Kevin's class the year before theirs, with fair to moderate success. "Georgie the cheerleader," she guesses. "Or Miss Jenkins the first year Algebra teacher." Then, "Ashley, that girl who always had lip gloss." She doesn't seem to get that Kevin would already have an answer to give and does not need help from the audience. She frowns a bit at the thought of kids mocking kid-Kevin. "Smart and quiet paid off eventually, right?" She's quite certain it has. Whether she thinks cardio is great or not is not a topic Harper chooses to address as she turns a n unveiled quizzical look at her friend before looking back to Kevin.

Kevin looks from Jessica to Harper at the eyebrow wiggling and the aggressive matchmaking. There might even be a little confusion at just how well the flirting is going. I mean, well for him. So he just blushes and takes another sip of his drink, "Why do you need something besides Kevin? And swimming sounds nice. I mean, when I have my suit with me. And yeah, I appreciate that you guys never mocked me. I mostly tried to just be like, inconspicuous..." Harper's shoving off of him, and he blinks, looking over to her a little owlishly. He sputters back at Jessica's response about cardio, "The... tread... mill?" Definite confusion involved. He looks down at his hip, pulling out the phone but not thumbing it on, "Oh, I don't have a girlfriend, and I bet there's a lot of terrible secrets you want to know, but I've gotta say, I don't have a ton of terrible secrets. I really don't... I mean, I played D&D all through middle school, high school, and college, but that's not terrible or a secret..." now he's rambling, and Jessica gets to the actual question and Harper starts asking follow-ups. He cuts off and looks between the two, "Uh... high school, so Princess Leia in the gold bikini is out. Got it." Whoops, that might have been a little too much information. He looks down, clearing his throat, "I mean, most of those, but mostly... it was Ashley's mom." The last four words are mumbled, and then he pops up from the couch, hefting the phone, "I... uh... I've got to take this real quick, sorry. It's my next door neighbor." And he thumbs the call through and steps toward the back of the boat, "Sorry, sorry..."

Real first name? Harper looks between Kevin and Jessica. "What real first name?" She looks accusingly at Kevin. "Your name's not Kevin?" As if that information is scandalous. There just might be some humor in drunk-Harper. But it's hard to tell. Ashley's mom?! Ashley's mom. Of course, Ashley's mom. With all the yoga pants and the tight this's and stretchy thats. Harper nods as if she is agreeing that Kevin is telling the truth. "Princess Leia fetish, huh? I think she was sexier in the Help-me-Obi-Wan-You're-my-only-hope white, though. With the things..." Harper's sexy list is going off the tracks. She mimes what looks like putting headphones on.

Kevin's past the first lose-lose and come out unscathed, so Harper looks expectantly at him. He was the one who was asked, so it's his turn to choose a victi-- er recipient of the T or D challenge. "It's all you, Walters." Then she leans in a little and says, "Dare her. She hates dares." Who's on whose side here? She lifts her half empty glass and toasts him on her own, then takes a drink. She swallows and looks to Jessica. "Is this my first still?" The s's are a little protracted. Not much. Juss a little.

"Ashley's mom?" Jessica peers back through the memory haze, made even foggier by the alcohol, and nods slowly. "Yeah, she had it going on. Now that I wear leggings to the gym, I can appreciate better now how good she looked in them. Certainly didn't look like two pigs wrestling under a blanket like my ass does." Best steer away from asses again. "You liked the white dress better, Harpo?" A shrug. "Ain't no shame in finding bread rolls sexy."

A roll of her eyes at Kevin. "Kevin is too many syllables to keep saying. If you can't have a one syllable nickname, then at least one that is humorous and or totally you. You're so not a Kevin. Well...technically you're not a Kevin, but you're not that name either." A look to Harper of the 'we'll talk about his name later'. "No, that's not your first drink. Not sure which one it is to be honest."

She moves back to let Kevin up to take his call from the 'neighbor'. Jessica reaches over to give a playful slap to Harper's shoulder. "I am very daring. You know that. I was even daring back in high school. Remember, I'm the one who put the textbooks in subject order instead of alphabetical order. Huh, huh, daring right." A proud nod at how 'out there' she was even back then. "I wonder if a gold bikini would rust?"

Kevin makes a slightly disgusted face at Harper's question, but then insists, "My name's Kevin, my middle name's Kevin. We do not speak of my first name." He snap-points at her once for the yoga pants, and again for the white outfit comment, grinning as he settles the phone against his ear -- humming Stacy's Mom, thanks Jessica. His face falls from its grin, however, as he listens to what's being said on the other end of the line, "What? Uh-huh... uh-huh..." disappointment and weariness replace the joy that was on his features, and he nods again, "Yeah... I'll be right there." Hanging up, he lets out a slow breath, starting back toward the two women, "Sorry Jess, Harps," yup, new nickname, Harpsichord was too long, clearly. "The cops are over at my place. Apparently there was some intruder or something? My dad called about someone sneaking around, and he's freaked out." He attempts a grin, but it's a pale imitation of his earlier ebullience, "As I got older, I began to see the wisdom of the white outfit -- so that's my dare, Jessica, get yourself a Princess Leia outfit, your choice, and wear it in public."

Harper sips at her nearly empty glass of R&C now. "Your ass looks hot in those leggings. I will not tolerate any more of this self-put-downery, Jessica Flores." Harper actually manages to sound stern. Her brown eyes are dark and her look is foreboding. But it quickly dissipates. By the time Jessica is speaking about bread rolls, she's smiling that inimitable smile that lights up her brown eyes. "Ke-Vin. Ke-Vin. Ke-Vin." Harper repeats the two syllables several times as if to test the accusation that it's too long. "I don't mind the 'Vin'," she states mildly. "Middle name, but then what's --" She is cut off. In more ways than one. "Not my first? It barely feels like I've had /any/." She wanted a refill. Harper 'ow's' at the playful slap. "That wasn't the dare." Then she's nodding, but it's sarcastic -- with drunk Harper you can tell -- "So daring," she agrees but so doesn't.

Harper returns to the subject of Kevin's first name and asks in a hushed tone, "Is it Voldemort?" She dimples a flirty smile as she's snap-pointed at, twice! Then Kevin gets up from the couch and Harper nearly topples forward into the space he vacated. Cops? Kevin's place? Clearly she's not hearing this correctly. "Did you do something bad, Kevin? We'll save you." Belatedly she recognizes the new nickname and smiles to herself. Clearly better than a baroque version of a piano. "Your dad lives with you? You live with your dad?" Well, that's just all kinds of confusing for Harper, who frowns again, just a bit. Then there's a faint grin from Kevin and an agreement about the white robes and Harper snap-points both hands back at Kevin. "I am always right." Jessica is given the dare and Harper rolls into Kevin's vacated cushion, laughing with delight. If Jessica doesn't catch her glass, a quarter cup or so of remaining R&C may spill onto the sofa. "Kevin just got another pooooooint!" she calls. It's not until a few minutes later when the laughing wears off that Harper turns her head, upside down and on the cushion. "Wait, you're leaving? But..." Disappointed!

There's nothing like an emergency phone call to drain the fun of the evening...and inject a little sobriety back in the hostess. "Everything okay, Kevin? Jessica asks as seriously as her tipsy self will allow. Though it seems things can't be too bad, despite the arrival of cops, since she has been given a dare. "Does that mean I can go with the Endor camo? I might even be able to do that with what I have in the..."

Jessica's line of thought interrupted by having to grab Harper's drink as her friend surrenders to gravity. That was close. "It's not Voldermort" she smirks, "It's Rumpelstiltskin." A concerned look at her workmate. "Thanks for coming round. Hope we can do it again sometime. But you do deal with what you have to deal with. Harpo and I can keep ourselves amused. For a start, she hasn't had Truth or Dare." Her eyes narrow into a dramatic version of evil. "I shall ensure this happens. Oh, yes, it will happen. And I will record it all on the phone. You're not supposed to be listening to that last bit, Harpo. So what's the score now?" How come Kevin gets all the points!

"Give me a call if you need anything" Jessica adds as Kevin heads off. She looks down at her upside down friend and sighs dramatically. "Maybe we should just go lesbian?"

Putting his phone away, Kevin shakes his head and sighs, "So sorry. Yeah, I moved in with my dad when I came back to town. He can't take as many jobs anymore. I'm sure it's nothing," by his frown, he isn't sure of that at all, "But I really do need to check it out." The upside down look from Harper draws a chuckle, however wan it might be. But then Jessica is going for Endor camo, and Kevin scowls, "Weeeeeeak. But yes, you can. And thank you both. It was good fun. I really appreciated the invitation. Harps, I think you have to give Jess a dare before you leave tonight. Thank you both," he presses his hands together in a sort of namaste gesture and immediately drops it, grimacing at himself, "I'm sorry, and have a good night." He's probably okay(ish) to drive. Toward at least one cop car. That will go fine. At least he makes it down the gangplank and onto the dock fine, turning around to give another wave on his way out.