2019-10-17 - No Sudden Movements

Is it a date? Appointment. A set time. No matter the definition, it's a very weird situation that causes her to be hesitant about entering the place where she supposedly lives. Does she knock, or use her key?

Finally, she must make a decision because there is the jingle of keys in the lock and the door swings open to the blonde crouching down, making a litany of kissing noises. Clearly it's a call for Gunner, and not for Easton, but let's see who comes bounding out first.

Well it's going to be an even race at least because both of them are parked on the couch. Easton, wearing a pair of sweatpants and a plain heather blue tee shirt has his legs propped up on the sofa. Gunner was lying with his head on Easton's lap, but perked up as soon as he heard someone at the door. He's basically in Bennie's arms licking her as soon as she is in the door and before Easton can even register that she's here. He leans his head back on the sofa and watches, giving only a soft, "Hey" in greeting.

"There's Thai in the fridge, if you're hungry?" He assumes she hasn't actually stopped to eat an actual meal that wasn't coffee and stolen donuts today.

Bennie's gaze flicks up to find Easton amidst the puppy love onslaught, her cheap ringed fingers scruffing and fluffing Gunner's furry mane. "I'm okay, thanks." She turns down the offer of food as she digs a tennis ball out of her bag, sending it in a bounce across the room to the enthusiastic scramble of puppy paws and happy yaps that follow. "Does he need to be walked?" Not that she seems enthusiastic about the offer for once, but rather it just being the Nice Thing to offer.

"No, he's good. We just got back from the park actually." Ugh, why does this feel so formal? Easton tries to smile but it comes out just a touch forced and pained. He says, "You could take him for the night if you wanted?" Ugh, doggie custody has it really come to that. He pushes the thought out of his head and stands up, just for something to do. He heads out to the balcony that is open, even though the air is starting to get chilly. He has a coat rack right by the door setup to hold a series of smoking hoodies. He slips one on and heads out light up, either intending to talk through the door or have her join him.

When Bennie texted him the other evening, she made it known she was staying in the building. It's not a leap to assume it's Sutton's apartment which her partner has left vacant since the string of murders in the building. She must've just come down from upstairs, because she's in just a pair of jeans and a slouchy sweater with a pair of sandals slipped on, obviously coming from the elevator instead of outside. "Smoke?" She asks of Easton's apparent need to vacate, so she follows after him and grabs one of those hoodies too. "I think he should spend some time in his own home, before he forgets our scent."

The balcony isn't all that big, but that works nicely for this. It's more cozy despite the chilly air and Easton leans against the railing. He first offers the pack to her and then lights hers first before lighting his own. He lets out one plume of smoke before starting, "I'm glad you came. We should talk." Oof, that phrase is loaded but he means it! Not in a bad way, just in a we haven't been talking about things that need talking. "And you don't need a nose full of coke and gun to get me to answer questions. I promise. Though, you kicking down the door and handcuffing me was super hot. I know I shouldn't be turned on by you doing what you needed to do to feel safe, but still. Hot." Look if she can be turned on by his heartfelt confession at the waffle house, he can at least admit that he gained a new fantasy that day.

Bennie folds herself into on of the patio chairs, tucking up her feet in the seat and blanketing her lap with Easton's sweatshirt, curling her fists into the hood of it and tucking her chin behind it as she watches him light up their smokes. The cloth smells like him, and she's drawing what comfort she can from it instead of just launching into the man's arms.

There is a smirk about the handcuff bit as she scissors away the smoke from his fingers. "I know." She says of needing to talk, not about his new fantasy, "I want to." And yet, where to begin?

"I'm sorry. For ambushing you. I just had to know before the funeral, even though you said to stay away."

"It's okay. You don't need to apologize. You were right." Easton sighs out a stream of smoke through his nose and gives a small shrug. "I didn't want to talk about the thing with Tom, but it did involve you. We're together.." He started off that statement sounding very sure and by the end it trails off almost into a question. But he soldiers on. "I should have talked to you about it. About everything. I don't mean to shut you out."

Too bad he's just so damn good at it. He's loudmouth boozer who can talk you ear off but he doesn't have much practice at all at saying things that actually matter. Especially not to women. Maybe it's why he's so close with Geoff, and was so close with Tom.

"But I want to try."

He hesitates almost adding something but decides to just leave it there for now.

"Is there anything you want to ask? Because I want you to know me." And he eventually wants to figure out how to show her into his mind, to open up those parts of himself. He just first needs to make damn certain that it's one hundred percent clear and safe.

Bennie pauses as she's about to take a drag, "Actually." She tucks the cigarette into her lips and digs into the bag that's still slung on her shoulder. "I had a thought about that." She mumbles the words around the filter, eyes squinting at the sting from smoke as it rises from the passage of speech. She pulls out a bottle of Patron she must've snagged from her partner's apartment. Likely was on of Ruiz' he hadn't gotten around too drinking yet.

"Yes. I do like tequila. Man, this is easy." Easton cracks a joke, not really sure where she's going with the bottle of booze just yet, but pretty sure he knows it's provenance. He asks, "Do we need glasses or we going classy style here?"

"Glasses would be great." Bennie takes another hit of her cigarette and then flicks it over the railing. "Actually can we go inside for this? I want to sit on the couch with you. Face to face. Level ground." She pats the the bottle. "That's what this is about. Let's strip away our filters. Cut through the bullshit and the fear."

Though he's not quite done with the cigarette Easton stubs it out and says, "Sure." He wasn't exactly expecting a bottle of Patron to be involved, but he's not exactly sorry for the addition. The rest is about what he expected. He grabs two glasses, adds some ice and lime (which is pre-cut in his fridge ... yea) and then heads over for the couch. "Do you have a list? A place to start? We doing this never have I ever style?"

By the time Easton returns to the living room, Bennie's settled into one corner of the couch cross-legged, turned sideways with the bottle tucked into her lap and her hand lazily scratching a Gunner's. He looks blissed out, with his eyes half closed, the tennis ball still in his mouth with is tongue lulled out to one side. "You're right, he's a monster." Bennie murmurs, offering Easton a curve of a smile at his questions. "I ...don't have a plan beyond the booze. Because it worked so well for me last time." She eyerolls at her own foolishness. "But this isn't an inquisition. I want this to go both ways. You were right. About all those things you said. The money, the Adderall. I don't want that hanging over us any more. Any of it."

"Okay." Easton puts both glasses on the coffee table and snags the bottle away to pour. He shakes his head at Gunner as he tries to get near the glasses to sniff and the doggy happily goes back for more head scritches. "Alright." He has been thinking about it a little. Okay, a lot. Going through the things he's kept carefully cordoned off. "I was engaged once." That's probably a good place to start. "College girlfriend that I started back up with after I had my commission. She was intense, but not all bad. It ended badly after the IED. After losing Tom and my leg and the corps. I just wasn't the same person. I didn't want to drag her down with me and ..." Ugh, there's a lot to unpack around this story. "I intentionally fucked it up when she wouldn't let me break up with her." With that he takes his first drink. Sharing. Yay(?) Also timeline: That means it was maybe a year ago that they broke up, Bennie would know how long Tom's been dead and how long Easton's been in recovery. d

It's a delicate little dance, them both leaning towards the table to get their drink on but with Bennie subconsciously trying to avoid contact. Her hand bounces around Easton's as he pours the tequila so she can grab some lime and the salt shaker and eventually claim one of the glasses for her own. "Katherine?" And before Easton can wonder if she's suddenly psychic, she explains simply. "Tom." With a quick motion, Bennie takes the shot and then holds the empty glass out to him to refill. "So you started being a dick, sleeping around? Is that where you learned your technique for pushing people away? "

Easton notices the hesitancy in reaching for glasses and in her movements in general. He tries to chalk it up to them just being out of sync after everything and tries not to worry that she's terrified of him still. His face falls when she names his ex and then juts out his lower lip at the explanation. He looks a little taken aback by her picking up the narrative and filling things in. He hedges, "Noo. I was always a dick. I just upped the sleeping around. And I don't know about the pushing people away bit." He thinks about it for a moment and then admits, "No. Pretty sure that's a more practiced skill as well."

"I basically grew up in boarding schools. All boys boarding schools." He hems and haws and finally admits, "Not sure I ever really got the hang of talking to girls beyond well.. ya know. Talking 'em into fucking."

"Sorry." Bennie flashes an apologetic smile for not only picking up the narrative but basically hijacking it. "It's your story." She mutters and curls her glass back to her chest, cradling it in a divot of sweater between her cleavage. "Just know that shit's not going to fly with me. If I know you need me, I'm not going to let you push me away...even if...I should have listened."

The smile gets a squint of his eyes, as if she's playing unfair and really in some ways she is. That smile means she can get away with quite a bit and Easton is pretty sure they both know it. Of course he's also nearly grinning about it as well, it's not a bad thing in his mind. "I don't want to push you away." He gets serious for just a moment to say, "Ok, then know this. I need you." Hey, she wants him to communicate, okay, he can do that.

"I know." Bennie murmurs and then looks down to her glass, deciding she should drain this one too, but it takes two gulps this time to get it down past the lump in her throat. Her face scrunches up as she bites into a lime, and tosses the spent rind back into the bowl. "I need you too. We need each other, because we're better together than apart."

"We are." Easton agrees gently. "But." Here he puts his drink down and makes an open hand motion with both hands, "If you need time. I get that. If you need space. I get it." There's a slight wince and hesitation in his voice before suggesting, "If you need to talk to someone. I understand." He takes the rest of his drink down and fills it back up again. He wills himself not to look at her, to just refill his drink like he always would. Naturally. "Because babe, I get that you don't want to feel like shit, or talk about how bad some things are? I know how that is. But you can't just plaster over it all. It's going to catch up to you eventually."

Bennie wedges her thumbnail between her front teeth, nodding along with his words. "I think I'm going to see someone. Professionally." She reluctantly says. "I've been talking. With Alexander. Not...not details but just. He went through what you did, different results but the same cause. And I heard myself giving him advice that I need to listen to too. It wasn't your fault. I don't blame you. You would have never laid a hand on me, and I know that. It's just...I don't want to flinch when you touch me." She puts out her glass again, the warmth in her gut from the alcohol making the words flow easier.

"So now I'm going to tell you about ...a place that I come from."

"Okay." Easton tries to remain perfectly neutral when she's telling him her plan. His eyes narrow at the part about Alexander as he realizes he hasn't heard those details either. He was so relieved to be out from under it that he hasn't caught up with everyone yet. When she starts talking about it not being his fault he looks skeptical but nods. And then she says the part about flinching and his face breaks just a little. He forces himself to just nod and say, "Okay" again. What else can he say to that?

And then she's connecting it to her history and he nods, slower this time. "Babe. If there's anything you don't want to share. I..." He says, "You don't owe me details. That's not what I meant. If you want to talk about it. I'm here. If you want to just say broad strokes? That's fine." He realizes he's a little nervous of what she's going to say. He's seen a good amount of her past already, almost immediately when they got together. But he didn't mean for her to dredge up every painful thing in her past if she'd rather leave it there.

Bennie sees his face shift a little at the mention of flinching, but it's a pain she can't ease just yet. "I think in this case, it needs to be said. The reason why I plaster over things. Why I take it all and stuff it down and cover it in sunshine." She exhales through her nose, then sits up taller as if a straighter spine gives her more courage.

"I tell people I broke up with my high school boyfriend because I caught him cheating on me in the bathroom at prom. It's easy enough to accept, simple. Clean."

Easton tries to remain as quiet as possible, just taking small sips of his drink occassionally. The dog being far more emotionally capable than most humans lays his head on Bennie's lap when she begins to talk. Easton nods and says, "Sure" To the story about her boyfriend cheating on her. And then his brain catches up and his lips part just slightly in a grimace and a very quiet "..ooohhh ... shhhit .." escape as he thinks he sees where this is going. He takes another sip and braces himself. If he was ever to feel murderous rage it would be towards a douchebag who hit Bennie ... a different one. He's already pissed enough at himself without Gohl.

"No no, it's not like that," She promises. "I never went to prom." Bennie whispers wryly as she slides a little bit closer to him on the cushions. "Or graduated with my class for that matter. No, my boyfriend was from the next county over. Jeremiah, football player, all American boy. That type. And he stuck with me through my brother, my mother, and even the money problems. In fact he tried to help."

"And that's when they shattered his knee."

"He was never going to go pro, mind you, but it tanked his college scholarship. I've heard he still walks with a cane." She exhales, "Easton, they made me watch. It was a lesson. And I learned it very well."

The relief that Easton feels at having guessed wrong about where that story was heading is short lived. He nods approvingly and says, "Sounds like a good dude." About Jeremiah sticking through everything. And then they shattered his knee Easton makes a soft "oh" and processes that. "Benz, we will figure out a way to deal with that situation. But in the meantime if they try to hurt me to get to you? I will fucking end them." There's no anger in his voice, just an assured confidence that he is very much the wrong person to target. "Don't worry about me in this scenario." A doubt flashes through his mind that maybe that's why she's with him in the first place? Because she doesn't have to worry about him. Oh well, he shrugs that off, works for him.

"But I also promise not to kick any hornets nests. I realize there are still plenty of people around they could hurt. You primarily." He's calmed down from murder rage at least enough to realize that if he botches it or isn't thorough enough it just makes it worse.

"It's not just about you, Easton. It's about...how I became wired because of it. If no one knows anything is wrong, if I...if I smile hard enough, if I laugh and joke and pour myself into others, if I pretend everything is okay? Then they'll believe it. Then they won't pry, then they won't try to help. Then I don't have to see them get hurt. I can save them from that. I can save myself from that." Bennie admits to Easton what she's never been able to explain to anyone else. She's selfish.

Well obviously she's not the only selfish party involved, he's mostly thinking about why she's not telling him things. Not why she's not telling other people things. The part about laughing and joking gets a small smile at the corner of his lips. He knows a thing or two about this. "I get it. And I'm not saying I don't pull that bullshit. Tom used to call me out on it. He knew the louder I was, the bigger ass I was making of myself the worse off I was." He shakes his head and says, "You're keeping people safe Benz. And if that means you don't need to deal with another person getting hurt on your conscience? Good. That's not selfish. That's smart. I did plenty of shady shit to keep my men safe. And yea, partially because I was a afraid I might come apart at the seams if I saw another man bleed out on a stretcher. But it kept them safe too. So if you need to keep some people at bay with a smile and laugh, go for it. Just not me. Please."

Bennie worries the corner of her lip with her teeth as he asks her to drop the sunshine and rainbows for him. "But now you know why the Adderall. I used to use it just for the occasional help keeping things light and airy, not to mention give me the energy I needed just to get through my work load. Now? Well now I have drug dealers doing me 'favors' by giving me boxes full that 'fell off the back of some truck' and barely even blinking an eye. But that...story for later. Promise. First. I need to kiss you. And there is one sure fire way I know I won't flinch..." The blonde's smile forms again, and the bite to her lip turns a slight more suggestive as she dips down into her bag at her side and produces the second set of handcuffs she hadn't left with Easton last time.

Easton does get it now, at least more of it anyway. The part about drug dealers has his eyebrows raising and his mouth opens but then she says it's for another time and he nods. It helps then that she wants to kiss him, it's a good way to shut him up for sure. He's not sure what will help her not flinch, but when she breaks out handcuffs his face slowly grows into a huge grin. "I like where this is headed."

So she might have had a little plan about this evening? And thanks to their talk and the a bit of booze in her belly, Bennie's tempted to enact on it. Well, more than tempted now. One cuff swings from her fingers as she motions for one of his wrists, clamping on the iron when he offers it over before she instructs in her best 'cop' voice. "Hands behind your back."

Easton takes one last gulp of his drink, not wanting to have that sitting there if he can't enjoy it and then offers his hand. With the first on he turns and lets her cuff him up. He glances over his shoulder and asks, "Now what ma'am?"

"Now? No sudden movements." Bennie murmurs as he hands drop to his shoulders. It's a moment of hesitancy, of doubt, before her palms slowly slide down to his biceps. It hasn't been long enough to have forgotten what his muscles feel like, but she has no problem taking her time to remember. Head canted, there is a soft press of her lips just beneath his ear before she just inhales his warmth and scent. "Turn around, back to the sofa."

"Yes ma'am." Easton agrees in his most polite Marine voice, watching as her hands trail down his arms. A low hum from the back of his throat escapes at even the lightest touch from her. Yes, they had an interlude or three after the funeral but it's been a while since they've had any time to spend on these pursuits. He leans his head away as she draws near for a light kiss and can only answer with an "Mmmhmm" when commanded. He adjusts to get as comfortable as can be on the couch in the declared position.

Sure he has his hands pinned behind his back against the cushions, but hopefully the Blonde sliding into his lap will help ease a little of the discomfort. "I like when you call me ma'am." Bennie grins one of her wide smiles, but the expression seems a bit more subdued if only by the way her eyes close to slits and her breathing turns into a purr in her throat. Palms graze the grizzle on his cheeks, fingers curling to angle his face just right she finally makes true on her promise to kiss him. Soundly.

Having her across his lap is all the comfort that he needs. He lets out a sigh of contentment and desire as she slides on top of him. He moves his arms as if to touch her, having already forgotten about the cuffs. His own smile is not quite a bright, a little more anticipatory, expecting and wanting. He leans up and into the kiss, at first content to let her kiss him but soon hungrily kissing back. His back arches as he pushes up to meet her and press as much of his body as he can against her. The feeling of her hands on his face amplified by the fact that he can't touch her back, he presses his face against one hand then the other.

Unlike the frantic filled need that fueled their post funeral sex, this is about something quieter. Something more intimate. A much more subtle need of acceptance and forgiveness, on both sides of the equation. Even though it would be amazing to have his strong arms around her or his hands pulling her hips tight against his, she seems to be relishing the creative new ways he has to invent in order show physical reciprocation. There is the slight vibration of a laugh as their tongues duel against each other and the power gets to her head a little as she playfully bites his lip.

Later, when the handcuffs finally come off, they don't really have a conversation about where Bennie will stay the night. With a sleepy murmur, the blonde merely asks that he'll cuddle with her on the couch until she falls asleep. She won't be returning to that bedroom, not tonight. But she snuggles down content, because she's home.