2020-02-07 - Three's Company

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : We should jam again soon. What kind of music do you most like to play? I'll see if I can learn a song or two, or at least get my hands on the sheet music.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : fuckin love to. Fiddle music is my favorite. Cajun, bluegrass, real shitkicker stuff

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : Hah. Well, I'll have to expand my repertoire. I don't think anything I currently know fits that description.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : how about folk punk? Pogues, Gogol Bordello, Dropkick Murphys?

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : You've met me, yes? You do me credit if you think I've been even a little punk in my entire life.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : there's also some good piano and violin classical duets. hell I'm not picky. I just like playing with you.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : ehhh you're punk in your super sophisticated brit way

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : I believe I'm exactly the type the punks were rebelling against.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : HAH. fair. well time we expanded your horizons

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : I'll have a look and see what I can find that's within my skill level.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : Rocky Road to Dublin, maybe

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : Ahah. Pub songs I might be able to do. Knowing several of those is pretty much required of everyone in the United Kingdom and Ireland.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : Irish stuff then, I'm into that

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : It will be strictly instrumental as I've found my voice does not suit the genre.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : my shameful secret is I'm into literally every kind of music

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : no problem, I'll sing

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : So, I messaged you to genuinely set up a jam session, and we could discuss this further when you're here. But I did have an ulterior motive.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : oh, uh, okay... is this about de la Vega

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : Oh, no? I haven't met him.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : okay, disregard previous message. what's up

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : I was wondering if you might have some advice.

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : About balancing multiple partners.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : sure, man. what is it you wanna hear about

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : How do you manage...jealousy? If I'm being honest, I've never done this before.

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : I've had multiple partners at once, but all were casual. And the casual tended to stop once I got more serious with any one of them.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : yeah, to be real honest, I'm not new at it, but this is the furthest I ever got with people, and being serious about all of them. okay, so, who's being jealous of who

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : There's a little bit to go around. It's a head versus heart situation.

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : I was very clear from the start with all parties, but there's theory and there's practice.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : I mean, it happens. it's pretty natural. we grow up with everybody telling us there's one person in the world we're supposed to love with everything we have. turns out that's not true, but you gotta teach yourself that it's not true

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : it ain't that different from being queer, like that.

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : Intellectually I knew I was saying to both of them that I wasn't able to commit to them alone. Well, with Cris, I don't think he would have wanted it even if it was on the table.

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : But I had my first taste the other night of a front-row seat.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : god knows I'm having a bitch of a time with jealousy right now. it's lighting me the fuck up.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : yeah? how'd that go

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : Poorly. Cris tried to pull me into something with another person when I ran into them while they were on a date. It was good intentioned, but I didn't want to.

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : We've talked it out since, and I think we're okay. But I can see it happening again.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : heh. he's a firecracker, that one

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : That's part of the reason we wouldn't work as exclusive. I think he wants, and needs, more than I'm able to give.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : yeah, wouldn't be surprised. he's a needy guy. like. really needy. so you saw him with someone else and hated it?

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : I'd call him someone with an unquenchable libido rather than needy, but.

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : Yes. They were flirting with each other, and with me. And all I really saw was the bits with each other.

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : He said it was because he wanted to share with me.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : hey I gotta drive home, keep talking. ping you when I'm back

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : Understood!

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : I know it's completely unreasonable for me to be jealous considering I'm the one who set the terms.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : that took forever. Hey, it's unreasonable, but love ain't reasonable. you feel me?

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : Roen told me something great. said jealousy is fear of losing what you have. think that's pretty true. even though I'm fucking crazy jealous over my guy.

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : I don't like feeling jealous. I get angry at myself.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : yeah, me too. I start acting like a dog guarding a bone and I don't feel so great about myself.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : ...not that I ever feel great about myself, but

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : You know half this town adores you, yes?

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : tf?

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : I've yet to meet anyone who dislikes you.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : Christ. now I'm blushing.

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : And that's part of the reason why.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : ...I fucking hate my capillaries

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : I'm terrible at accepting praise myself. So I get it.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : okay ANYWAY we're talking about you here, Taylor

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : Damn. You've caught me.

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : I'm better at deflections in person.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : here's the thing. having more than one person isn't really about yourself. I mean, it is, obviously, but the way it kinda shakes out is you like seeing your people living their lives and having fun and doing stuff and that you don't have to make them STOP any of that.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : you just kinda slide in and become a part of it

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : Cruz is always gonna be a fucking tomcat, so ideally, you'd do the stuff you really enjoy doing without him while he's out being a fucking tomcat. see your other guy. read, play, whatever. do stuff for you.

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : One appeal of this open relationship business is I don't feel completely responsible for another person's happiness. I admit that takes a fair bit of pressure off.

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : And if I'm being completely honest? With Elias especially, I hope he won't be closed off if someone does come along who can make him fully happy. That he won't shut down that chance because of me.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : yeah. exactly. for me that's like. I don't have to be everything. I can just be my kinda broken ass self.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : that's how you know you're doing it right. when you think 'yeah if my boyfriend finds someone he really likes, I'd love that guy to be a part of his life'

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : I let my wife down because she committed fully to me and I turned out to not be who she thought I was. I never want to hurt someone like that again.

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : I'm sorry, this took a bit of a mopey turn.

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : And precisely. And I hope that if his new beau didn't want to be open, that he'd feel able to let me go and not feel beholden to me.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : that's okay, I'm being incredibly fucking hypocritical right now telling you all this shit when I'm about ready to throttle the guy I'm jealous of

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : ah come on, that's selling yourself a little short there Taylor

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : Elias initially asked me to be exclusive. I told him I couldn't.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : he must like you an awful lot then

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : He's a very easygoing young man. I've checked in with him to make sure he's okay and he's always reassured me.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : my first real boyfriend was also dating four other guys

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : Oh my

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : it all ended in fucking disaster because he didn't talk to anybody about what he was doing with everybody else

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : I honestly don't have the scheduling abilities for that sort of thing. Let alone the stamina.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : right? Christ who has the time

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : That's the rub, isn't it? Tell your partners enough so you're not keeping things from them. But not so much that they're jealous.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : some people like don't ask don't tell, but in my experience, that only leads to trouble

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : Isolde wants to know who I'm with but not what I do with em. Bex loves hearing about what I do with de la Vega. kinda gotta play it by ear.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : he's not out, by the way

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : I would never presume to talk about this with anyone. I know how sensitive these things can be.

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : Especially in a small town. Especially with a person in power.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : thanks. didn't think you would, but just to be safe. engineer, yannow

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : I've also never spoken to the man. Except, perhaps in passing.

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : Another reason to never say a word.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : he acts like an asshole. but he's actually real kind and wonderful. ...sorry, mushy

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : I'm a romantic. Don't worry about the mush.

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : You don't have to answer this if it's too personal.

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : But have you ever been with more than one of your partners at once?

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : actually no. threesomes or whatever, yeah, but with someone I wasn't in love with

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : my guy, me, and some hot piece of ass, you know?

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : It was...in his own way, a bit sweet that Cris wanted to bring me into his thing.

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : But I can see that making things very complicated.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : sweet, also kinda dumb

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : It's proof that we don't know each other all that well yet. As he thought I would be into it.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : should probably talk about that stuff

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : We have. He came over the morning after. After he left her bed, that is.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : did that not go so well?

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : We talked everything out. Academically, we're okay.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : but...

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : Well, I've come to you for advice because I could see this happening again. Either him of me or vice versa.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : Cruz seems like nightmare difficulty level when you're just starting out trying this stuff, to be real honest

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : You aren't allowed to tell him I told you this under any circumstances, but

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : He's actually quite sweet in private. In his way.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : heh. I know. he's softhearted under all that brassy attitude. he'd punch me if he knew I said that

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : He also doesn't let me back out.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : he's not a nice guy, but he's a good dude.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : I dunno if any of this has helped. The kinda bad news is, there's no manual to follow.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : take home message: look after yourself, be happy for him when he's found people he likes. and seriously? if you can't be happy for him, no matter what you do, maybe this ain't for you.

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : Always a possibility.

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : Cristobal and Elias couldn't be more different.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : any way it works for everybody is a good way. that's the only rule. sometimes people don't have full things with more than one person, but kinda casually date others. sometimes four people all get married and live in one house.

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : Again, I haven't the time for that. Though I suppose having people under the same roof would help with that.

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : I'm debating whether Cris and Elias getting to know one another would be a good or bad thing.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : probably good. I introduced Isolde and Bex to de la Vega. It helps if they know the other person ain't a raving lunatic.

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : They met once. I brought Elias to Cris' house after a Dream because I was afraid he'd been hurt. And Elias can heal.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : once? yeah get them together.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : tell Cruz he's not allowed to hit on him. or that he is, I don't run your life.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : but either way, tell him what you want from him.

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : How would I even propose that? Come to mine, have tea, meet my other lover?

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : Somehow I think Elias is the one person in this town he wouldn't flirt with.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : yeah, actually. that's how I do it. Except not at home, neutral ground is better.

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : GOod advice.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : don't have to be a production, just show up, have a couple drinks, talk some. nothing to it

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : You've met Cris, yes?

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : 'Not a production'?

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : he'll behave himself for you/

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : frikkin soft keyboard

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : I'm honestly not sure how I've managed to tame this barbarian.

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : Sorry. Context. There is this Fantasy Dream we've been pulled into twice now.

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : He's in a loincloth. I've got this full leather outfit.

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : Good lord this sounds like a porno.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : hah, man, I feel the exact same way about de la Vega. talk about a tomcat, that guy's the worst. Well, he used to be. now he's only with me. God I love that so fucking much.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : ...okay, you in leather, Cruz in a loincloth, this sounds like a pretty good porno to me

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : Except the first time Alexander and Easton were also there. We fought tiny tree people and raiders.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : shit, got some of Gray Harbor's hottest men right there

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : Easton had elf ears.

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : But also a beard.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : whew. love it.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : what was Alexander wearing?

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : Alexander was a dark wizard of some sort. The Dream was affecting our personalities. Cris spoke some sort of grunting language. Alexander was sinister but on our side.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : ugh, hot.

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : It was actually more broad comedy. My hair was down past my shoulder and a curly mess.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : hey, I know hot cosplay when I see it, pal. or hear about it. whatever.

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : It was the first Dream I'd been in that wasn't explicitly threatening. Very odd.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : they're not all bad. some of them are pretty good.

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : This is what Elias tells me. He grew up in this town. He's been helping me make sense of it all.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : thre

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : fuck, dropped my phone. There's a lot out there that's real good. but They try to filter us only into bad.

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : Why do I feel like it's tempting fate to talk about these things over text?

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : ehhh...it does kinda. but fuck them.

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : Listen, I should put my head down and get some work done. Thank you for your advice. Jam soon, yes?

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : jam soon, you bet your sweet British ass.

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : Yes, my ass is rather sweet, isn't it?

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : I credit the pool at Bayside.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : yeah you know it is, ya flirt

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : I'll be very mature here and say, takes one to know one.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : ahhhh get outta here

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : Oh you know you are. You make yourself blush doing it, but you are.

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : You can't have three lovers and not be a good flirt.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : don't call me out like this Taylor

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : You're blushing right now, aren't you?

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : God! didn't you say you had to go to work

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : That's the beauty of working for myself.