2020-05-27 - Keep On Keeping On

Easton is missing.

It's just a fact. A thing. Something for Bennie to deal with and conquer. She's been a flurry of activity around town and then, just. Nothing. For the last few days no one has seen hide nor hair of the blonde, holed up in their rented cabin with occasional glimpses of their dog, Gunner, trotting around the neighborhood by himself because she's only opening the door to let him do his business on his own.

But he always comes home.

Alexander tends to be of two minds about this sort of thing. When he is sad, his first impulse is always to hide, like a wounded animal afraid that if it shows weakness, it will be torn apart. So there's an impulse to just let things lie and let Bennie deal with the loss in her own way.

But Bennie isn't Alexander, and after a bit of thinking about it, he decides that she would prefer company, whether she's in a mood to ask for it or not. So he walks across the town, through the burgeoning spring, and picks up a hot container of soup, as well as a small bag of donuts, on the way. He doesn't phone ahead or anything. That would be SILLY. He just strolls on up to the cabin, and knocks on the door. "Bennie? It's Alexander."

There are a couple of excited WOOF!s at the knock but either Gunner thinks it's just too much trouble to bark or someone inside quieted him down. It's still a pace of time before Bennie eventually opens the door, but she's in there. No doubt something Alexander can feel without prying directly into her brain. It's just a fuzz of being.

The door cracks open and Bennie squints at the in flood of daylight into her darkened cocoon, all the curtains drawn throughout the A-Frame except those on the peak of the floor to ceiling living area windows that just can't be covered. Her hair is up in a messy nest of a knot on top of her head, and she's wearing one of Easton's t-shirts and a pair of boy shorts. "Hey." She rubs a knuckle along one eye socket sleepily, but it's clear from the darkness that rings them that she hasn't been sleeping much if at all. At the moment, there's not any indication of inviting him in. "Heard anything?"

"Hey," Alexander says in return. His flat stare takes in the darkness under her eyes, and he shakes his head. "No. If I had, you would know," he points out, gently. "I've been trying to get him with my abilities, but he's not...here. So I can't. And it doesn't always work right on the other side." He shifts from one foot to the other. "I brought soup. And donuts. They're both still warm, but won't be for much longer." A pause. "So can I come in?"

Alexander is one of the few people that Bennie would let in, no matter the circumstances, but still she seems a little hesitant. "Uh. Yeah, sure. Just...mind your step." She pushes open the door the rest of the way, and the reason for her trepidation becomes clear. It looks like a mini tornado has hit their home, cardboard boxes they hadn't had a chance to unpack yet have their flaps open, their contents strewn about with zero order and there in the middle of the floor is Gunner curled up in a pile of clothes from both 'parents'.

"Just let me..." Bennie bites her lip and scuttles over to the couch to start pitching things off the cushion to make a spot for Alexander to sit.

Alexander looks around, his eyebrows twitching upwards a bit, although he doesn't make any comments about the disaster area. He makes his way over to a clean space of countertop so that he can put down the soup and the donuts. Then he turns around, makes his way back towards Bennie, and gently offers her his arms for a hug. Ignore that he has to brace himself to do that - it's clearly a sincere offer, nonetheless.

"Aw, hey." Bennie folds herself into Alexander's arms, but she doesn't crumble. Squeezing him warmly, she assures him. "It'll be okay. I've lost Easton before, we always figure out a way back to each other." Her palms rub his back, comforting him for a second before she gives a little pat and dislodges herself, ushering him over to the couch. "While you're here, can I show you a few things? I've been digging through Easton's stuff, looking for anything that might help."

Alexander folds his arms gently around Bennie. He's not a great hugger; he doesn't get much practice. But he returns the back rub with a gentle squeeze, before stepping back and taking a deep breath when she dislodges herself. "If there's any one of us who is capable of surviving over There for an extended period of time, it's Easton. And if it's a Dream, then he might not be gone long at all, from his perspective." He moves over to sit down on the cleared space, gingerly, like his might break the couch or something. Maybe he's afraid of sitting on a hidden gun.

He nods. "Of course. What did you find?"

With Easton, it's a good possibility.

As Alexander takes a place on the couch, Bennie just folds herself on the floor. Gunner raises his head lazily, wondering if it's snuggling time with mom, but when the gentle giant sees Bennie rooting around for something he must figure now is not the time. "So, first, I found some papers. A, uh, Living Will of sorts, I guess. It looks like he was thinking ahead, but then he always did have a Plan. It looks like he paid up the Cabin for a year in advance, so there's that. It also..." Bennie sighs, shoulders sagging, "I guess it leaves me the bar. But I was hoping you could have someone else take a look at them? The only lawyer I know is his ex, Katherine and that just..doesn't seem like a good idea."

Alexander waggles his fingers at Gunner when the big dog's head lifts up. A brief smile in that direction, before he refocuses on Bennie. "Papers? What sort--ah. I see." There's another smile, this one rueful and fond. "Yes, that sounds like Easton. I can find someone to look at them, sure. Call in a favor or something." Do any lawyers owe Alexander favors? It's hard to imagine that being the case, but he doesn't seem bothered by the possibility that he's talking out of his ass. "Will you keep it open? The bar?"

Alexander's fond smile draws one out of Bennie's own, faint and distant. But as he asks about the bar, she just blinks at him owlishly. "Of course. He loves that place, someone has to keep it running until he gets back. Easton has a manager, I'll just...fill in. Handle the paperwork, whatever. And I figure it will be a good home base for people. Organizing volunteers to go to the Veil, whatever. You don't...you don't think I should? I can't just shutter the place. People depend on that place for a paycheck."

"I think you should," Alexander says, quietly. "It's a good place." He hunches over, so he can rest his elbows on his knees, and study her. "I like the home base idea, too. If you're okay with using it for that, I think it'd be useful." His eyes are fixed on her face. "Are you dealing okay with things?" And yes, he asks this even as they're sitting in wreckage of unpacked boxes, and sounds entirely serious about the question.

"Summer's almost here, the tourist business is starting to pick up, but if people need privacy, they can always use the office. I'm sure Camila will have no problem getting me a set of keys, even before you vet the paperwork. I, uh, didn't have the heart to read all of it, so." Bennie plasters on a smile at the question, even if she doesn't have the gaul to make it her full beam of sunshine in front of Alexander. "Oh. You know me. I'll keep on keeping on."

Alexander stares at her. Then he looks away, towards the floor, and bends further to pick up a sock. He rolls it into a ball. Then?

Then he throws it at her face. Lightly, but hopefully it's a clean sock. "I know you will. But that's not what I asked, Bennie. It's okay to be fucking sad. I'm not gonna run away. None of your friends are. You know that. I hope you know that."

Bennie flinches as the sock baps her in the face, bobbling at it between palms before finally catching it. "I can't, Alexander." She looks down at the sock, one of Easton's athletic ones, and she starts pulling at the fabric. She unrolls it and stretches it out, shoving her hand inside to turn it right side out. "Not yet. I can't cry, I can't fall apart about this. If I shatter I'll never get the pieces together again and I have to be strong right now."

"Crying isn't weak." But then, Alexander sighs, and runs his hands through his hair. "But you gotta do what you gotta do. I get that, Bennie. I do. I just--" He grimaces, makes a low sound of frustration. "I don't really know what to do. I don't comfort people. I'm bad at people. But I don't want you to feel like you have to put a brave face on because if you don't, no one will be there to help. We're here. I'm here. Happy to help, in whatever way we can."

Bennie keeps her eyes on the sock. "I know." About all of that, really. She smirks, shoving her hand back in the sock and suddenly making it a into a mouth with her fingers. "You're better at people than you think you are." The sock says in a cartoon voice, "At least Bennie."

She gives a little sigh, and the sock face reaches into a cardboard box and comes out with a small jewelry box from the contents. "I also found...this." She hands the velveteen cube over to Alexander, the contents: an engagement ring. Katherine's, that she recently returned, and Easton hadn't had the chance to pawn. But clearly Bennie has gotten the wrong idea, judging by how she bites the corner of her mouth as she waits for Alexander to open it.

Alexander snorts. He can't help the laugh that escapes, although it's a harsh and chuffy sort of sound. "Somehow, I find the reassurance uncompelling when it comes from a sock puppet." He watches the sock dip into the box, and takes it when she offers it over. It's a ring box, so he's expecting to find a ring inside. He still breathes out, though, a low whistle through his lips. "It's beautiful." His eyes flick up. "Did you want me to read it?"

Bennie's face disappears into her hands, covered one half by the sock glove. So yes, hopefully it's a clean one. There is a shake of her head, her topknot wobbling back and forth. Hands slide down her face until they are just poised over her mouth, muffling her mouth as she says. "I don't know."

"I should just put it back. If he meant to give it to me, he'd be upset the surprise was ruined when he gets back. In fact, he'd hate all of this mess. I really should start picking up..."

Alexander studies the ring. His finger reaches out to touch the cold stone, then the smooth metal. "I don't know what he would want. Just asking what you want. But, if you're not sure, we can put it back, and you can always change your mind later, if you want." He smiles at her. "And yeah. Easton keeps house even better than I do, and that's saying something. Want help to put things back in order?"

"A girl can only handle so much heartache in one week. For now, it'll just be a reminder about how much life he still has to live. How much he still has plans for." Bennie's smile turns a bit feeble as she reaches for the box to snick it and tuck it back away. Instead of moving to start the daunting task of picking up her mess, she scoots closer to Alexander and lays her head on his knee. "Maybe in a minute."

"Of course." Alexander hands the box back without hesitation. He doesn't even 'sneak a peek' for his own curiosity, even though by the way his eyes follow it, he IS quite curious. He's about to stand up to try and start helping clean, when instead, there's a Bennie scooting closer, and placing her head on his knee. He goes tense immediately, but doesn't flee the touch. Instead, he says, "You could always try to tell him that it's just a new, popular style of decorating. Might get him to buy it."

There's a soft laugh from Bennie, no more than a little hiccup of amusement. "You should've seen him twitch when I suggested I use that little bonus room in the back for my sewing and crafts until he realized it would keep my chaos contained, and we had to compromise on an acceptable number of throw pillows for the living room because he knows I would just fill the space with fluffy things. This? This would give him an aneurysm." She give a little rueful rub of the tip of her nose, "Four, by the way. Four is the acceptable number."

"Two on each side of the couch, overlapping slightly, but not more than a couple of inches," Alexander says, firmly. Someone also has opinions about throw pillows, it seems. But he chuckles. "That's one of the interesting things about Easton, I have always thought. You look at him the first time, and it feels like he's just this big, brash bro-type. But there's a lot more to him. It's interesting. Like a mystery." He smiles, then looks around. "Lot of boxes. Moving them somewhere until they can be unpacked might help feel a little less cluttered, even if you don't want to move the other stuff, yet."

"I figured he just picked up the spit shine routine in the Marines." Bennie murmurs. "This is everything. It's mostly junk. Things I had in the storage unit, some of my family's things and from E's apartment. I figure I'll just...shove everything in the guest bedroom until he's back and we can sort through it. Not like Gunner and I need all this room for just the two of us, right?"

"Military men are often like that," Alexander agrees. "I got mine from the cults. When you live on top of other people, you tend to learn to pick up your shit, or else it gets broken or lost. Or you get punished. Because no one likes to deal with someone else's stuff being in their way." He reaches down and gingerly pats her head. "You might enjoy going through some of it, though. Putting it up, settling in here. And then there's not an avalanche. When he gets home."

"This was supposed to be our place, Alexander. Our home, together. I just...can't. Probably best I keep whatever I care about to something I can just haul on my back, right? Or a leash now, I guess." Her toes wiggle in Gunner's direction. "I just wish the guest bathroom had a tub." There is another huff of a laugh, but this one seems to have a sniffle attached to the end of it.

Alexander opens his mouth. Then he closes it. Then, with a grimace, he opens it again. "Then make it for the both of you," he says, leaning so that he can look down into her face, or at least part of it. "Make it a home for him to get back to. Not just a place you're staying until something makes you bolt. I don't think...I don't think it's good to make the hole bigger. Making a good place isn't shutting him out. It's doing what he clearly wants you to do." He nods towards the papers.

"To keep on keeping on..." Bennie repeats her earlier words softly, clearly considering what Alexander has to say. Make it their home to come back to. "Because he will, right? Come back Because we always find our way back to each other." She takes a deep inhale and then straightens away from her lean against his leg, probably much to his relief. "Okay. So. You start in here, and I'll start upstairs in the master, we'll work our way back to each other?"

Alexander does take a deep sort of breath when Bennie straightens up, but it's not entirely from the relief of his phobia. There's a relief for her decision, as well. He offers her a warms mile. "Right. The only way out is through. Easton," a long pause. "Easton knows that. He'll do everything he can to return, and he is a formidable man." It's the closest he can get to the reassurance she wants, perhaps, but he seems to believe it. He stands. "Certainly. Do you want things organized, or just tossed in the nearest box for later perusal?"

Bennie wipes her face with her ridiculous new best friend, Mr. Socko. "Compromise: Organized tossing." Bennie cracks a little smile at him before she turns to head upstairs and when they aren't in direct eyeshot of each other, she calls back. "Thank you. For being here."

"Anytime, Bennie," Alexander says, just loud enough to be heard as she heads up the stairs. He watches for a moment, until she's out of sight, then looks down at his feet. "It's good to have friends," he says, in a voice just for himself. He gives Gunner a smile, then starts cleaning up. In deference to 'organized tossing', boxes are separated out and filled with like objects.