2020-08-01 - Text Message Confessional

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : Did we run into each other at the boxing gym at one point or am I misremembering?

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : hell I dunno, maybe we did, I'm there a lot. what's up

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : I would like to learn how to throw a proper punch so I can defned myself in this mad town.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : there's nobody better to teach you that than Joey Kelly, but he might have a lot on his plate right now. so you wanna learn to box?

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : Just throw a punch. So that if the shit hits, I'm not a damsel in distress.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : you know you're not anyway, right?

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : I've started talking to August about my strange abilities. Cris is goig to teach me to shoot. But I wouldn't want to ask Cris to hit me. I don't think he would.

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : I don't exactly know how to defend myself, if I'm being honest. My muscle is purely decorative.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : Roen's a good teacher. I know a lot, too, I can show you some stuff. Well, lemme tell you, having muscle and not knowing how to use it is better than not having muscle and not knowing how to use it

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : I don't want Cris to worry about me. Because if he worries about me, he's apt to push me away to try and protect me.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : you work out, you know how to use your body. it's not too different. the biggest different is how it feels to get hit by someone. and that, I'll help you with.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : it's actually kinda like getting up in front of an audience. you just don't know what it's like until it happens. so, yeah.

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : I'd certainly appreciate the help. I've been fortunate so far that I've not been pulled into overly dangerous scenarios.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : yeah, and you can't count on RNG to keep you out of the shit

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : RNG?

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : random number generator...gamer talk, nevermind. I just mean you been lucky

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : Ah, yes. I was never cool enough to be a gamer.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : "cool enough to be a gamer" there's a phrase I have literally never heard in my life

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : And I have indeed. I realize that. Aside from being a fantasy archer with long hair and a few walking nightmares, I haven't actually hit much of the weirder side.

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : I was a theatre nerd. I believe that puts me lower than gamers on the teenage hierarchy.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : ehhhhhh debatable. lol. so anyway, punching

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : Yes indeed. It seems to be something of a crapshoot which skills might be useful in any given scenario. So it seems wise to cover my bases.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : it sure can't hurt! get some hand protection, don't wanna bust your pretty knuckles open

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : I suppose that is a concern. My hands are my livelihood. And my hobby as well.

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : ...I mean the piano, not dirtier things.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : same....and same

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : get the kind that are sorta like fingerless gloves with padding. we can tape your knuckles and wrists, too.

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : I've been hanging around Cris too much because my mind went a place with taping my wrists.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : HAH. yeah I just bet.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : how are you and him doing

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : Well? I mean, it's skewed the dynamic since Elias left. I've another mistress in the restaurant but I do feel a bit like I'm waiting on him sometimes. Which is not the best feeling.

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : And there's parts of his life he won't show me. I know it's to protect me, but.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : it's not a great feeling. been there. am still there sometimes. who's your girl?

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : Oh, I meant the restaurant is my mistress. She does demand my attention.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : OH. I knew that. I was just pretending I didn't. also I'm a liar

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : I was a bit vague in my Britishisms.

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : The only issue is, the restaurant doesn't warm my bed when he's with someone else.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : hot guy like you, though? bet you could land whoever you wanted

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : I don't want to be with someone just to even the score, you know? That doesn't seem fair to the other person. Before Elias and Cris at the same time, I was a serial monogamist. It just happened that both of them went from casual to more serious around the same time.

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : Everyone in this town seems so entangled with one another that it makes even casual sex potentially thorny.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : evening the score isn't a great motivation, but that's not what i meant

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : THAT'S true enough though. small town life

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : I struggle to think of anyone I know who is single.

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : The sort of nihilism that hangs over this town seems to make everyone bloody horny.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : Roen says it's like being in a war, makes everyone horny and bond tighter

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : Yes, that's my thought as well. And find your pleasure while you can, with people who understand the darkness.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : to say nothing of the fact that this place attracts hot, tormented bad boys with perpetual hard-ons

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : You've noticed that as well?

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : shit, i been accused of being one, lol

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : I don't think I've ever met so many bisexual men per capita.

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : I would certainly place you in that category.

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : I myself am a certified ponce and not a bad boy. Though I do have a thing for them.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : it's kinda nice, though, not having a lot of toxic gay culture around.

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : It's true. This town has a lot of issues, but I don't feel unsafe grabbing Cris' arse in public. And that's saying something.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : can be tough to be a bi or pan guy, the straights don't like us and the homos don't like us. but here we're all bi or pan so we get to make the rules.

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : Although that might be because a lot of people in this town can throw a folding chair with their minds, so it's not exactly safe to pick a fight with the gays. Even if they look like they can't take a punch.

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : Why doesn't this town have a bloody pride festival, anyway?

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : we totes should though. it was hilarious when I held a pride night at Easton's, he yelled at me. man I miss him

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : Although I'm not certain we need an excuse for more debauchery

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : Well. I could use a little more. Cris keeps things exciting, but as I said, my bed is empty some nights.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : aww, poor hot ripped British boy with a sexy af accent and those eyes

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : Alas, alas. I am such a tragic figure.

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : You know I'd have you in my bed in a heartbeat if it wasn't so bloody complicated, and if I didn't fear it would damage our friendship, yes?

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : whoof, I blushed

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : And that's part of the reason I would.

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : I apparently have a thing for tough guys with a soft underbelly.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : god it WOULD be fucking complicated, though. but...yeah you're fucking hot. just saying.

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : I'd be afraid of the police chief breaking my teeth if I'm being honest.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : that is a perfectly rational fear. though he's a lot more likely to come after me. and me, well, I love that. first time I kissed him was while we were beating the tar out of each other

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : I admit I'm not fully on the pleasure and punching train. That's part of the distance between Cris and I.

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : There are things I can't give him, which is not a good feeling.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : that's why the poly stuff is good. you don't HAVE to give him everything. you don't have to make yourself crazy like that, or make him crazy because he doesn't get it. that said...yeah it kinda is a suckful feeling

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : Yes. And to be honest, I have an easier time with him seeing women than other men. Of course a woman can give him things that I can't. I don't want him to resent me, so I would never deny him. It got that way in my marriage and I wouldn't do that. But another man?

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : Sorry, I don't mean to unload.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : look, it's still hard for me that de la Vega has another boyfriend. Not that I wouldn't be jealous if Cavanaugh was a girl, but it'd be easier, because, yeah, exactly. he ain't and it's still hard. I'm completely fucking crazy about de la Vega and if it was up to my selfish, stupid ass, he'd be mine alone.

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : So look, if we're not going to shag maybe we should just get shitfaced the next time we find ourselves with empty beds?

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : I do own a bar, after all.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : used to have a girlfriend, myself. used to have two girlfriends. they both wisely dumped me. aaaand I miss it. I miss them. so yeah that sounds great

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : Elias sent me a Dear John letter before he left town, so I know how you feel. I've actually been dumped far more times than I've been the dumpee.

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : And now I'm left with my boyfriend with a girlfriend and well...I'm not sure what Cavanaugh is to him.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : yeah. I'm sorry about Elias, man, that sucks the worst out of all the sucky shit. and hah, me too, dumped way more than did dumping. like people wise up about me or something

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : Honestly I feel like I'm the boyfriend people think they want, but realize they don't after a time.

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : Sorry, that was a bit depressing. Didn't mean it to come off so self pitying/

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : I know Cris loves me, and that's a wonderful feeling. But it's so complicated.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : we're mutually self-pitying, it's fine. but what do we got to pity ourselves about, we got a hot stud of a Mexican boyfriend apiece

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : He keeps speaking Spanish to me and it's hot but he could be reading me a grocery list.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : I'm swearing you to secrecy on this...but de la Vega recites poetry to me in bed. in Spanish.

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : Poetry? My my. Cris just says beautiful things. But he also had me write on him, and then he had it tattooed.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : oh man. those two lugs are such romantics

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : I wouldn't have guessed that about your police chief. He doesn't give off the impression that he likes anyone. Well, except you.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : he likes a lot of people. even people he knows he probably shouldn't like. me and him have that in common. but I'm a big sap about it and he just gets snarlier. so he's got a better take on it than I do lol. and he loves poetry. and music. I play for him all the time.

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : That's very sweet. I feel like you two are a more likely match than Cris and I.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : ehhhh that's a low bar

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : ...that was rude, my bad

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : Despite appearances, I've actually a rather thick skin.

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : You have to be when you're a writer of mass market horror fiction.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : yeah I could be less of a dick sometimes though. look, shit IS complicated, it's all made worse by this fucking town, but...I think both of us could do a lot worse. yeah?

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : It's quite true. I do consider myself fairly lucky in spite of all the complications and the occasional feeling of inadequacy.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : and for what it's worth I think youse guys make a hella cute couple

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : Opposites attract. We actually just had an anniversary of sorts. We started as a random hook-up at the Firefly a year ago.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : that's kinda pretty hot

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : So I dragged him back there a few days ago

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : He started out by antagonizing me and spoiling for a fight. Which makes perfect sense.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : that's how he says he wants to bone!

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : he tried to pick me up with a line so awful I slugged him

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : He told me afterward he either wanted a fight or a fuck but didn't care which

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : But I'm a lover, not a fighter.

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : I am absolutely not surprised.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : never met him before in my life, he told me he loved my camwhore work, you know, the camwhore work I don't do

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : ...yes that sounds like my Cristobal.

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : The second time we met he was antagonizing me in the antique shop. Looking back, I'm not even sure how it developed. It started off as just a casual shag and then slowly built from there.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : so I cracked him one. he probably got hard over it.

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : I was already seeing Elias when we met and had told him I couldn't commit fully. Perhaps in part because I felt something with him.

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : Almost certainly.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : honestly, de la Vega and I kinda went from hate fucking to denying we were stupid in love. it happens.

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : I suppose the saving grace of this town is that it pushes people together who might not have gotten together otherwise. If it weren't such a small town. I'm sure Cris and I would've been ships in the night in some seedy bar. And then never saw each other again.

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : But it's impossible to have a one night stand in Gray Harbor and never see your shag again.

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : Part of the reason I haven't been on the prowl.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : I banged SO MANY guys in NYC. and so many military guys. they'd ship out the next day, you know? didn't matter. dick just there for the riding.

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : I used to go to this one tourist bar in London

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : Looking for guys who would be charmed by my accent.

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : And then I got married and resigned myself to smiling at waiters.

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : And then, well, I've told you about what happened next/

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : your accent is gorgeous, mine sounds like a mechanic from the Lower East Side

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : Which is delightfully charming, and honestly, exotic for a Brit.

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : Not to mention 'mechanic from the Lower East Side' is the start of many a porno.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : I just cracked up THANKS

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : Am I wrong though?

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : god you are not wrong.

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : Where I come from, your accent only exists in Scorsese movies.

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : It's the bad boy accent.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : to Americans I sound like a Jewish housewife arguing over a deli counter

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : It's charming as fuck and don't let anyone ever tell you differently.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : goddammit now you got me blushing again

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : The fact that you blush is also charming as fuck.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : stupid overreactive capillaries!

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : It makes them very pinchable.

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : Sorry that was a tad inappropriate wasn't it?

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : Hah! a tad, but ya good

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : Anyway, I'm going to crawl into my sad, empty bed in my posh flat after working at my fancy restaurant, and lament my life as a famous author.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : poor famous author and posh flat. See ya at rehearsal

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : Where I'm sure you'll put me through my paces again.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : with spurs, my good man

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : Promise?

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : Sorry. Like I said, too much time around Cris.

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : yeah you don't fool me, Taylor, get outta here

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : Imagine me batting my eyes at you

(TXT to Dante) Itzhak : oh my god stop it you're terrible GO TO BED

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : Let me just get into my silk pajamas...

(TXT to Itzhak) Dante : OK, ok I'll stop