2021-02-01 - Gotham City Is Not All Right

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : roen said you bounced

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : I hate hospitals. Spent too long locked up in one.

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : They let you off the tubes yet?

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : mostly, got a drip, they put the good shit in it so not complaining too much

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : heard you got gunned down because you were stupid enough to run into a gunfight

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : I got a prescription for Tramadol that I've been eating like cereal, yeah.

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : Nah. I was stupid enough to be around talking to Røn when the gunfight started.

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : But, I guess I didn't have to run after de la Vega into the dance studio

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : Just, I dunno, it made sense at the time.

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : no you fucking didn't

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : yeah...shit like that makes sense at the time

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : Whatcha gonna do, just watch people run into a fight and go well la di dah, I think I left the stove on?

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : My bad luck there was a sniper on the rooftop across the street.

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : don't even remember the last of it. had an idea Cavanaugh got shot but then Reyes, Chief Motherfucker of Clan Motherfuckers, showed up and all i wanted was to pin him the fuck down. someone had to tell me you were there and took a sniper round.

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : Yeah, I got hit pretty much as I walked in, no wonder you didn't see.

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : I remember Reyes walking in and giving some kind of speech but I was a little busy dragging myself off to the side and I honestly don't remember what he was on about. Think I lost consciousness there because the next thing I recall, I'm in a hospital bed.

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : someone also had to tell me i passed out so lol i guess.

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : Seth said he was on about blood and broken bone and darkness, typical shit you'd expect from someone who's probably got Veil for brains.

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : ...huh. didn't hear any of that. he had the Song all right though. real strong. but he couldn't beat me at it.

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : Yeah, he felt like a furnace to me

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : pool of lava, sliding in

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : I feel more sad about those unfortunate petunias of Røn's that I threw at the damn shooter outside than I do about Reyes taking a chest full of lead.

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : maybe I should have killed him. don't know. could have done it but holding him down so kelly and javier could take turns at him seemed more important.

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : There's something to be said for payback. Don't know details, but, I know enough to figure both of those had a few things they wanted to thank the guy for.

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : hah, poor flowers. his garden show, man. that's just rude to ruin a man's garden show with hot lead

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : I know right?

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : Petunias make great ballistic missiles

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : pretty sure I killed one of the bruisers. at least one. maybe more. never killed anybody before. it's fucked up how I kind of care and kind of dont

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : well

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : I've never killed anyone

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : But when I went for Liu? I was trying

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : And I don't feel bad about it.

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : feel like I kind of understand Roen and Javier a little better now.

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : Those guys -- the things they've done, the kind of deals they've made -- they voted themselves off the island. Taking them out is garbage disposal. Nothing more.

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : kind of there with you. kind of not. kind of don't know what the fuck to feel or do.

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : Yeah -- I kinda get now, why -- you know in WWII, surrendering German soldiers got asked a lot. Why did you stay? why didn't you desert? The shit you've seen, the way you're losing, country being flattened and burning

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : And they'd say, I couldn't leave my friends

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : that's what I felt like, when I walked in there.

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : yeah. same. wasn't gonna leave Kelly, and he wasn't leaving, so what was I supposed to do

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : I'm not happy about people dying, I'm a bloody pacifist.

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : But, some people remove themselves from the human race, it seems.

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : You'd never think twice about swinging a fist at some guy if you came across him in an alley, pulling the pants off a kid. This is honestly no different.

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : it is. it is

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : How is it different?

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : that guy maybe he could be put away, get help, maybe he could do some kind of good. if he survived what i did to him. which isn't a given to be fair

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : The kid groper? Maybe. But you'd still knock him to the ground, stop him in what he was doing.

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : that's different it's not

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : its not forever

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : And I'll bet you that at some point, guys like Liu and Reyes had a choice like that too -- do you want help? do you want to be this? do you want to sell your soul? And they said yes, they chose to go to the dark side.

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : Like the kid molester, getting out of therapy, getting out of jail, and doing it again

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : I think for me... Liu blew that receptionist's head off because she made noise. Not because she was a threat, just because she annoyed him. That's a level of evil I can't -- I can't look at a man like that and think of him as human.

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : dont want to agree but if i saw that i wouldnt stop until he was a bloody pulp

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : I vote that when you get out we go... I don't know, drink ourselves senseless, swear and cry and yell about it.

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : Right now, though -- I kind of need to tell myself we were doing garbage disposal.

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : fighting for my life and Kelly's life and the guys in there with us....i can't feel bad about that but maybe it's because i'm the wrong one

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : How would you possibly be in the wrong? You didn't go hunt Reyes down, he came for you guys

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : You're not the guy who sent a hit squad to take out strangers at a garden expo

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : I fucked up guys before. fucked them up for life. if any of those guys survived what I did to them they're fucked up for life too

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : They had no reservations about gunning down random uninolved civilians. I can testify to that, being one of those random uninvolved civilians.

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : we didn't kill Reyes. we didn't because ...because.... because that fucking edgy batman comic

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : I dunno, Itz. Not sure I buy it. I get where you're coming from, I think I do. Just, we all make choices. You decided to stop being a thug thinking with your fists. Reyes didn't.

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : Yeah? Heard he was dead, or at least got shot up pretty bad.

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : I'm so fucking stoned but that batman comic right? because our way WORKS. it has to work. being a cop has to mean something, being a good guy has to MEAN SOMETHING, things have to mean things or what the fuck i'm no better than he is

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : Yeah. It's good if he's alive and can stand trial. It means something.

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : yeah he's fucked up but alive

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : I decided that I decided that but then Naomi got cancer and I did fucking sell my soul

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : That whole Batman/Superman myth though -- you realise it's such a big part of your culture because it's such an important lesson for your culture

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : wait, what?

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : that's just it though, every time batman lets joker go, joker goes and kills another thousand people, so why can't batman kill the bastard? it's because he's fucked up inside

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : There are two lessons there, though

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : he's fucked up inside so he can't but he does all he can do

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : One being that if Batman makes himself jury, judge and executioner, then it means everyone ever gets to make those calls, and that would be pretty damn awful for society

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : But also that society can't leave everything for one guy to sort out while it turns a blind eye, society needs to go out and clean up the mess that creates someone like the Joker

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : ... sorry, folklorist.

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : Batman wouldn't be a good guy if he executed people. But there wouldn't be a need for Batman if Gotham city worked.

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : Now tell me, who's Naomi?

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : I hated that fucking comic but that's the one thing I keep thinking. we have to show him our way works.

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : my sister

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : Yes, you DO, because if you don't, then EVERYONE gets to go kill people they don't like for shit and giggles.

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : Bloody hell, Itz. Is she ok? Is this recent?

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : she's got a little girl, Miriam. and a scumbag ex-husband I never liked

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : yeah pretty recent. she's still in remission. nobody knows how long that lasts, maybe it'll never come back but maybe it will

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : Hoping the best.

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : They don't live here, do they? Don't remember seeing you with family

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : pop died when I was 15 and she was 7. kinda had to raise her, ma had to work

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : nah they live in Manhattan

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : Imagine you're pretty close then

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : For some reason I can really picture you as a family man. The kind of bloke kids love.

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : yeah. i kinda raised Mireleh too because Naomi's scumbag fucking husband started sleeping around on her while she was pregnant. so guess who got to be there instead of him? spoiler it was me

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : Oh bleh.

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : Insert the rant you'd expect from my highly conservative self about keeping your commitments and your dick in the pants it belongs in.

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : me and Ma. ...heh, really? shit that feels good to hear. I like kids. girlfriend wanted me to have one with her but then I couldn't do it so she left me but she and me both had the Song, wouldn't our kid have it too? the things Alexander says about growing up here with the Song... how could I do that to my own kid? and i'm not leaving. i'm just fucking not leaving de la Vega or Roen or anybody

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : I don't think I'd want to raise kids here

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : If I was planning to have any, I'd probably not have decided to stay

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : oh honey you're not conservative or you'd be giving me shit constantly for the thing with de la Vega and Cavanaugh, not to mention banging my undermechanic like a screen door in a hurricane

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : 🤣🤣🤣

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : Guess that depends on how you define conservative. I'm pretty damn oldfashioned when it comes to keeping promises and not going behind your partner's back.

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : (Glad to hear you managed to nail the undermechanic though, I remember you talking about it)

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : Oh, hah, wanna hear something funny?

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : Went to the library the other day. Ended up chatting with a couple of young guys -- one of the librarians, and Mac's shop guy, the quiet one. And a couple of older guys turned up.

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : Acted like I was trying to solicit both kids for some weirdass BDSM experience in the stacks. I had to leave before I either cracked up laughing or punched someone.

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : nah I don't do shit like that anymore but for a while out of prison I did like I couldn't see the point of not but after I got thrown out of a shared living thing for banging two of the guys there and one of their girlfriends I was like maayyyyybe this isn't the greatest thing

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : Unnecessary complications.

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : and I wanna keep de la Vega, fuckin forever if he'll let me, so yannow. ....what? what older guys?

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : Eh, some guys

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : Don't know them.

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : Just funny -- me, the guy who solicits twenty-year-old boys in the stacks. Yeeeeees.

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : the quiet one, you mean Kyle? wait was the other librarian Turner?

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : Yeah? You know them?

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : Kyle's just kind of a local idiot, Turner is some baby gay who keeps giving me and Cavanaugh looks that I can't interpret

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : I kinda figured with Turner, but the funny was that these two older guys were all WE GON' PROTECC

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : he'll look at us like 'i know your secret' which, if it's that we're fucking gay, congratulations you hacked the matrix

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : Me, the ominous lurky glove sadist. Phantom of the LIbrary, man.

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : fuck don't make me laugh it hurts so bad

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : I know right?

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : who the fuck are these older dudes and why are they so wrong about you

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : Kyle seems like a nice kid, though. Did his best to throw some pain relief at me. I mean, I appreciate that.

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : now i feel bad about calling him an idiot

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : No idea, who cares. It was funny. If I see them again, maybe I'll pull off a glove with my teeth and wink, or something.

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : ahahaha maybe they thought you were gonna steal turner away to your decadent lair of gloves and folklore

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : I kinda got that impression, yeah

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : And like, no offense to Turner, but, 20 year old boys are not my thing. He was in no imminent danger. 😆

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : Ah, Gray Harbor. Where you move past 'so we all nearly died' to the important stuff like 'a guy thought I was hitting on a guy'

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : they used to be my thing but then I got old

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : Keeps us sane, I guess.

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : They were never my thing. I mean, Turner's kind of pretty. As in, I could mistake him for a pretty girl in bad light. But I'd lose interest fast once he turned out to be missing a few things.

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : oh he totally looks like a girl. I had to ask

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : That's one thing I've never been accused of at least

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : Looking like a girl. Often get assumed to be gay or queer but not that one.

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : wonder if he's trans, not that it's any of my fucking business

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : Might be, might not be -- for me, if he presents male, then he's in the wrong demographic to get my attention. No matter what is or has been in his pants at some point.

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : I mean, that's kind of the point of trans.

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : no you don't look like a girl, any more than I look like a girl

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : I've seen you in a short dress, buster.

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : even when I wear a dress I don't look like a girl. hey this is much better than talking about nearly dying

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : Honestly, it kinda is.

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : I knock all the boys out in a short dress, baby

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : I'ma pinch your butt if you walk past me in that.

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : I got a jealous boyfriend who might fight you lol

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : You got a jealous boyfriend who might laugh his ass off because he knows I'm no threat

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : yeah well you really aren't any kind of competition no offense

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : None taken, I'm not trying to be, and I am decidedly not your type even if I were 🙂

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : Even if I was on that side of the fence, you and I would make shit partners, I think

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : Both of us are the kind of guy who needs something -- stable, to center them. Or at least someone who isn't needy

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : heh yeah, which de la Vega is really good at, most people think he must be a crazy animal or some shit but he ain't

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : or, well, he aint only that.

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : I've had the kind of girlfriend who needed me all the time

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : And I needed her, I ended up hanging on her every word, trying to keep her happy so she'd not be mad at me.

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : that's fuckin abuse man

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : Maybe

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : All I know is, if I get involved with someone again sometime, it needs to be someone who doesn't need me

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : don't fucking maybe me, it is

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : Someone who likes having me around in her life, sure, but doesn't need me there.

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : (and definitely not some 20 year old)

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : in the meantime there's violin

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : Heh, yeah, that's the other thing -- I meet somebody, she needs to have her own things because I'll still be running around all over, playing with you, researching, talking to people, doing all the stupid things.

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : I'm pretty set as a bachelor to be honest.