2021-02-11 - The Best Bar in Town

Is it a day that ends in 'Y'? Then the Poorhouse is more than likely open! Not that the sign would always tell you that, the bulbs in one letter have been burned out for a while. It still spells 'OPN' phonetically of course. Maggi is busy working on a chalkboard list of beers on tap given that it is delivery day from her distributors. Clear handwriting with a bouncy sort of quality etches the percentages of fermented tap contents. This is borderline embarrassing as typically only 'preps' scrawl in this manner. After a decade in university one learns to make their notes legible.

The color of the day is, surprise, black...An over-sized woven sweater dips off a pale shoulder. Pleather leggings accompany her Martens and a long thin piece of leather cord wraps around her neck before descending past the 'V' in her fibrous top. Two miniature silver knives adorn the bottom where most girls as pale as she is would prefer feathers.

The bar smells of stale beer and fried food topped with yesterday's smokes. 'Santa Monica' by Everclear hums at a steady volume from the speakers mounted on the employee side. Have those things actually been given a home? Must be Leon's handy work, irritated with them being knocked over one too many times.

The colour of the day is always black. Ravn's only yielded ever so slightly to the idea that he might try on colour; he's wearing that black scarf with the silver stripe that he started lugging around after coming back from Europe. Silver is a colour. Sort of. He's colourful. Done.

The Dane wanders in in the afternoon much as he often does, heading for a bar stool and asking for a wheat beer. He upnods at Maggi and raises an eyebrow when he catches her eyes. "Place didn't burn down or get shot up during karaoke? Are you not competing with the Twofer after all?"

"I'm just trying to live up to being the disappointment my parents expect." Maggi snaps back without looking up, her hand finishing the last letters on the chalkboard pieces. She walks backwards slowly, hands hovering while grasping a piece of chalk. The act is as though someone was attempting not to disturb a sleeping, but lethal animal. Convinced the sky wasn't going to strike her work with lightening she sighs in relief.

She attempts to toss the chalk into a nearby bucket and curses as it lands nowhere near. Shrugging she dusts her hands on a bar towel, because all black clothing. She wasn't some heathen wearing a silver strip or a chalky hand print. She reaches on tip toes for a clean beer glass and pours Serengeti Wheat, an American Hefeweizen. The flavor is more on the malty side with banana? Were she not likely to actually burn the place down trying, she may attempt making some sort of syrup from it.

"Besides," She says sliding the amber brimmed glass to the goth traitor, "I have you as an exhibit here so I'm already up one bird."

"True, that. In the name of corviddom, I salute you." Ravn samples the beer and finds that it's sweet but not too sweet. "Got to say, I don't mind not getting shot at. Turns out the experience really is vastly overrated? One out of ten, do not care to repeat?"

He rests his chin on one elbow, watching the bartender bustle about. "Town feels very quiet now, have you noticed? It's almost as if everyone is just holding their breath, waiting to hear that Reyes or Liu bolted from jail. Maybe we should get back to what we were doing before that all blew up. Heard somebody mention -- uh, gremlins on scooters."

From the man's tone, yes -- those gremlins.

Vic is, mercifully, finally out of the hospital and off pain meds. That means she can drink again. The tall blonde steps into the Pourhouse, in jeans and a sweatshirt, with her hair in a messy ponytail. Apparently she hasn't quite graduated past the 'sloth' stage of recovery. She's been mostly immobile for weeks, and her lung capacity is something she has to work on getting back to where it should be. Even walking from the truck to the bar was taxing. She heads to the bar proper and gives her apprentice a small smile. "Abildgaard, good to see you."

Maggi raises a slender hand to her forehead in a salute, bringing it down to a middle finger just to spite him. A sarcastic grin directed full at him to declare her action playful. "I take shots at you all the time." She declares, "Ten outta ten."

The look that crosses her face is murderous. The lust of Ahab for the death of the white whale only lacking the beard and harpoon. No one ever give her a harpoon please. "Trash monsters." She breathes with disgust. One could only imagine that she was thinking of squashing them in mass.

When Vic approaches, the blonde attempts to get her shit together, still looking a little pissed. Maybe that was just her face? "Oh, Hey Vic." she had only met the woman a handful of times and always at the two's. The effect is akin to seeing a kiwi in a pile of apples.

"'Allo, Vic. Cheating on the Twofer when you're off duty?" Ravn waves lazily to his former co-worker and trainer, probably still Sith Emperor. "How's the place keeping together anyhow? Heard you hired a new guy, and that the boss couple are still in Mexico."

He looks back at Maggi, quirking an eyebrow at the thundercloud that flits across her features. "Them, yeah. I was thinking we should maybe go do something about them? I'm... pretty much back on my feet. Give me a few more days, maybe. Didn't get hit as hard as Vic when the hard rain came down, and thank fuck for small mercies." A glance to the Vic in question and he adds, "From what I heard, you damn well near punched out there, Grey."

Pushing the door open, Seth emerges from the outside into the dimness of the bar. He must not have been too far behind Vic because he arrives moments after the door closes behind her, but even so he takes a moment at the doorway to scope the place out before taking the few extra steps over towards the bar. "Ravn, Maggi, Vic," he nods on greeting to each one, "How're things?"

The bouncer/enforcer slides up behind Vic and gently places a hand on her shoulder as he leans over to kiss her cheek before slipping onto a barstool. "Glad to see everyone back on their feet."

"I've been off for my recovery from having my lungs deflated from lead poisoning," Vic mutters back. "And this place is closer to my house right now. I get winded on the stairs." She sighs and slides up onto a stool. "New guy isn't all that new. Pizza delivery guy. Good kid." Then... "Trash monsters?" She blinks. Seth appears like a magical teddy bear and she gives him a tired smile. "Hey handsome."

The air outside is cold enough to hurt, but that doesn't stop Joe. The sailor's bundled up in his black watch cap, white silk scarf, gray greatcoat with the Little Prince pins on the lapel, and those fingerless gloves in shades of ocean blue. He's smiling as he comes in, the stray snowflakes swiftly dwindling to little pearls of melt on the fleece of his cap. He heads for the bar with a distinct limp, before hitching his way up on to a stool and tugging off his cap, leaving his hair in wild disarray.

"Howdy, neighbour." Ravn greets his fellow marina dweller with a wince upon seeing the limp. "Christ, you two... I thought I took it bad but I got off easy in comparison. Are you both going to be all right, in the long term?" He glances at Vic as well -- and then at Seth. "Between us all, we really should stop getting shot. Can we agree to stop that? Good. Seth, I need to talk shop with you sometime."

"Ya, they are like minions of hell who have no morals and klepto hella hard." Maggi responds to Vic. She watches the exchange between Seth and Vic curiously and then eyes Ravn. "I just live in this bar don't I?" She says with some disdain. "So Now Easton is in Mexico and Seth has been body swapped?"

Ruefully she pulls down a bottle and puts it near Seth with an iceless glass. She greets Joe congenially. "Hey Cosmonaut!"

Seth smiles at Vic's response before arching a brow as he turns to look to Ravn as the former con-artist talks about wanting to 'talk shop', "Uh...sure..." the enforcer says hesitantly as he continues to eye Ravn oddly. It's an odd request given what Seth does, but he shrugs it off as he glances over towards Maggi, "I've been what now? I became a pod person and I didn't know it? Damn those body snatchers. Well, I hope they like whiskey as much as I do. Speaking of....can I get a whiskey?"

"I'm all for being shot less. The hospital's food is so bad. If Seth hadn't brought me burgers now and then, I might have faded away from hunger," Vic mutters. She winces and a weariness seems to wash over her. "This might have been too soon to go out for a drink. I'm going to need to head back home I think." She gives Joe a small nod of hello, before leaning to kiss Seth's cheek. "See you later?" she asks. Then she's heading back to her truck.

"Coulda been worse," Joe says, sunnily. "I mean, fuck, when I got shot in Afghanistan, I didn't wake up for days afterwards. Nearly died. I don't plan to do it again. Hell, didn't mean to do it this time. Seems kinna unfair - Dreams and the life beyond the Veil are bad enough, but being shot by ordinary humans?" He shakes his head. Maggi gets a grin. "Hey there, you. C'n I have a Jack and Coke?" There's a hand lifted in farewell to Vic.

"There's something -- mundane about it? Almost seems unfair. All the enemies we have around here, and we get taken out by mobsters?" Ravn nods, smiling, and sips his beer. "You're right. When you look at it that way, it's kind of comical. Move over, Cthulhu, we got Warren Beatty coming in."

Then he glances at Maggi. "You know, Magpie, you should tell these two gents about the trashmonsters as well. Joe in particular since he lives on the water. Remember how that little asshole nearly sank my boat?"

Maggi motions to the bottle already sitting directly beside him. She waves at Vic as she leaves, then mouths and pints from behind her hand. 'Are you two like a thing?'

Nodding to Joe and giving him a genuine smile, she puts together his drink. "Oh ya, so these things steal and murder people. It is possible intentional. They have a hive mind and like water. Think they live in the sewers? There is a body count so keep an eye on anything vital. Careful squishing them...they are rank."

Seth watches Vic head out with a slight frown forming on his face, apparently distracted by her as he didn't notice the whiskey being placed down next to him. "Oh. Thanks."

Seth shrugs a shoulder as he starts to open the bottle to pour himself a couple of fingers worth of the amber liquid, "We aren't putting any labels on it," the enforcer says as he recaps the bottle, "but yes, we are spending quality time together." It's obvious really, so there is no reason to try and deny it. "I still don't get the whole doppelganger body swap comment though. I'm slow on the uptake today."

Seth looks over to Joe and gives the sailor a nod before doing a back and forth between everyone, "Are you talking about those gremlin things?"

Now Joe's glancing between them. Not skeptical, per se, but definitely bemused. "Wait, what? Trash monsters? I've heard of things in the sewers, but what's the deal there?" Apparently he may care little for his own person, but God forbid anyone touch the Surprise. Then, then, there will be hell to pay. He rubs an inked hand down his face, and sighs.

The question and answer re: Vic have Joe looking a little rueful, but he doesn't comment there. Only grants Seth a lazy upnod.

Ravn nods. "Yes. The gremlins. The ones from Safeway. First time I met them was on my boat. Maggi was visiting and well -- one of those little assholes tried to sink the Vagabond. They managed to sink some fat cat Seattle yachter's boat. If he'd been less of a piece of work, I'd have felt sorry for him. They stole the hull valve out under him. Would have stolen mine too, no doubt, if not for my cat."

He laughs softly. "And this is why they fear my cat. She bloody well ate the face of one of them. And they have this... collective memory thing going on, it seems."

"That cat is ten times as badass as we will ever be." Maggi says, passing over Joe's drink to him. She rolls her eyes at Seth over-dramatically. "Dunno, figured any romantic bone in your body had been crushed by whatever you don't talk about doing in your free time." Is she mocking him? Yes, yes she is.

She looks back toward the Cosmonaut and Casanova, jutting her bottom lip out in a 'fuck if I know' gesture. "We probably shouldn't have left them alone for so long without knowing their agenda. The town could have a bomb under it or something now." Her eyes are comically wide and she puts her hands up in a shrug. The gesture is similar to a waitress delivering food, but all they were getting served was anxiety.

Seth smirks at Maggi, "What I do in my free time has no bearing on how I might feel about something or someone. Not sure why you think it would? My hobbies are just the same as anyone else. I watch movies, cook, and work out to fend off the cooking. Speaking of, Ravn we should have another movie night." Seth brings the glass to his lips and takes a sip, returning the upnod from Joe before returning his gaze to Maggi. "If you're talking about my job as a bouncer, I leave that at the door when I get home...or at least I try my best. Doesn't always work, but Vic being in the bar business understands."

"Now those gremlins, on the other hand, those things are stinky fast fuckers. Thankfully I have only had to tangle with them once."

Joe's brows head for his hairline. He doesn't look alarmed, precisely, but he's literally sat up and taken notice, leaving that comfortable slouch behind. "Man, you're makin' me want to get a cat. I do think about it, I do like 'em. I just....don't think I'd be a real good pet owner. Sheesh." He shakes his head. "Piece o' work how? Rich, entitled asshole?" Apparently he knows exactly the kind.

Another glance between Seth and Maggi, and his lips purse, as if he's biting back a comment. "Yeah, where'd you meet 'em?"

"I'm always game for movie night." Ravn sips his beer. "I reserve the right to rant in a corner if we're watching some historic docu-drama. You have been warned."

Then he nods at Joe. "Yeah. Well-off, older couple, had a lot to say about me and Maggi on a boat. This was back when I was still the celebrity chef. They were the ones who started that rumour that I roofie-d her, so honestly, not shedding a lot of tears that their boat and vacation was ruined. That was the first time I met the gremlins. Second time, pet store -- a woman was killed. Third time, Safeway. Also casualties."

Maggi squints at Seth. He really was the absolute worst at charades, her kept going through the same motions. She sees the pursing of Joe's lips and raises an eyebrow in question. Now they were all playing. After making sure the unspoken question is conveyed, she stares deadpan at Ravn. "I have no recollection of this day you speak. Did you drug my beer?"

Deadpan turns to outrage and she wooshes her hand like a table being flipped. "I offer friendship and you drug me?" She sees if this gets under the Dane's skin and then winks at him. "On a serious note trash monster task force is a must."

"Safeway" Seth replies, nodding over to Ravn, "He was with me. It was a mess, they locked everyone into the story and the front windows had to get blown out so people could escape freezing to death. Not everyone made it."

The enforcer lifts his glass to his lips and drains the last of the liquid from it before pouring another glassful. "You know what else sucks. Elves. Alexander and I ran into a pack of freaking elves, along with a Santa, at Christmas. At least they didn't stick to high heaven.

The looks Maggi is giving him, Seth just either is ignoring or is really, really bad at picking up what it is she is laying down. Or both.

Joe whistles at that, takes a sip of his drink. Not an evening where he's in a hurry to get drunk. But then, he probably rode that ridiculous Russian motorcycle there....or else he's probably gonna summon a ride in the form of Rosencrantz or de la Vega. "Damn. I didn't realize it was that much of a pattern," he confesses. "I really didn't."

The mention of the elves makes him snort, even as he glances between Maggi and Seth again. As if enjoying the bouncer's deliberate obliviousness.

"I need to find another bar to drink in if roofies are a regular thing here," Ravn returns, equally deadpan. "I remember who brought the beers we were having that day. How do I know you didn't take horrible advantage of me under deck? Maybe it was my reputation those two awful old people were trying to protect? Maybe the gremlins were there to save me?"

He smirks. "Joke aside. Yes. We do. From what I picked up on Friendzone and the Gazette, they're still evolving. Learning to use tools, clothes. If we're going to let them develop into some kind of sentient culture down there, we need to at least reach some kind of arrangement with them that doesn't involve people dying."

The folklorist blinks at Seth. "Elves. Right. You know, I want to hear that story. Later. Now, though, I need to follow Vic's example. At some point I need to get started on solid foods and weaned off the opiates. This beer hit me like a truck."

He does look a little pale as he wanders off. Not 'we better get this guy a taxi' pale -- but definitely 'we should not get this guy another beer unless we hate him' pale.

"I plan to eradicate them all with fire." Maggi says plainly and shrugs. She watches Ravn go a bit warily and makes a note to check on him later. To the others she looks seriously on the matter at hand. "They took my fucking jacket." She spits with disdain. Maggi has decided to lay off Seth for the day, eventually she would figure out his deal. It probably involved selling baby tigers across state lines or some such.

In the case of Ravn and Joe she was strongly considering turning this place into an inn of old. Half the time owning a bar the locals went to was waking up in the middle of the night and wondering if they got home okay.

Ravn's departure is apparently Joe's cue. A one drink night for him - he checks his phone and then pries himself up. "I should be gettin' back," he says, simply. "Not stay up all night, like I so often do in winter. Good to see y'all," He's generous with his tip - can't drink at the Twofer anymore, so he's gotta stay in good with staff here. Then he's settling his watch cap back on his head, and ambling for the door with that funny swinging limp.

"Fire works," Seth agrees with Maggi as he sips at his whiskey. "Thankfully I have never had anything stolen by them, except maybe my dignity. I couldn't hit those fuckers. As I said, fast. At least I know the aroma they emit now though, so I will have a fair warning if I ever smell it again. So, what kind of jacket was it? Easily replaceable, or something unique?"

The look on Maggi's face is that of utter horror. She had seen a dead man with a squid cauterized where his head should be unearthed from sand and reacted less. Her mouth remains open as she stares at Seth for a full minute. "You do not replace a leather jacket Seth. It has died without a proper burial. The memories shared with it will not be eulogized. It was worn in when I got it from a thrift store. DO YOU KNOW HOW LONG IT TAKES TO BREAK ONE IN!!?!? The arms stay stiff for like two years." The messy haired conspiracy theorist sounds as though she may have been less upset if it were her husband stolen. She scoffs at Seth and shakes her head.

As Maggi goes on her tirade Seth's brow just raises up and up while he drinks his whiskey. When she is finally finished, over a minute later, Seth's lips quick up on one side into a smirk, "So, unique. Got it. I'm sorry for your loss. Though your story does remind me that I have to replace Vic's jacket. It met an untimely end itself when it developed some extra holes." That jacket however did get a proper funeral along with most the other clothes that were worn that night, placed in a fire to remove any evidence that might have been on them.

"So, you and Leon, how did you two meet? Locksmith and bar owner is an interesting combination of careers."

Maggi makes a gagging sound at Seth's puppy dog look he gets when talking about his sweetheart. "Uhhh. I was still getting my degree. I thought he was the jerk who had reported the out of date tags on my VW because he was taking pictures in a parking lot. He asked me to this bar and we went back to his place where he almost fried me to a crisp. Typical Disney love story. Might have seen him at a waffle place before that?" She was derailed by this and no very good at the story. She had a cactus personality, more prickly than fuzzy.

She pops a mint from behind the counter into her mouth and stares him down. "What the hell does 'not putting labels on it' mean?" She counters equally as personal.

Rolling his shoulder into a shrug, Seth answers "It means exactly what it sounds like it means. We aren't putting labels on anything. Like she is not my 'girlfriend', I am not her 'boyfriend' we are not calling ourselves 'friends with benefits' or any other nomenclature one might try to throw on it. It just is what it is."

Seth slides the glass of whiskey away from him, seemingly done with the drinks for the night. "How did Leon almost fry to you a crisp? Or is that something I just don't want to know?"

Maggi nods at Seth's response and ponders, thinking back on the night with bitter sweet thoughts. Her eyes look at the ceiling as she thinks. "I accidentally used my abilities because I had like zero control then and he had never seen anyone else use theirs. He was some kind of specialist in the military. They had him use his powers for crazy shit. Anyway between being powerful and getting attacked by things on the other side, he though I was some sort of fed or assassin. His hand went full Taser mode and I had to talk him down." She moves her icy eyes down to his, pretty sure she had gotten the details straight.

Seth ahs with a slow nod of his head. "That sounds like it was a crazy night. Glad you didn't end up crispy, and also glad that you two seemed to patch things up well enough to put all that behind you." Seth pulls out his wallet and drops a few bills on the bar, enough to cover the drinks and a healthy tip. "By the way, thank you for telling me I could heal. It has come in handy in the recent past. I wouldn't have known to think I could do that otherwise." The enforcer offers a small smile, and stands, tossing a wave as he heads for the door. "I'll catch you around, Maggi."