2022-04-30 - I Kissed A Girl And I Liked It

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : 🎶I kissed a girl and I liked it 🎶

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : TELL ME EVERYTHING

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : ... I'm blushing at my phone, good Lord.

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : I had a very lovely dinner on strawberries and crackers and wine, and it may have ended with us forgetting about strawberries and crackers and wine, and dancing under the moon instead.

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : Holy shit you got game

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : Nah, but she does, and I love it.

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : So did you do it

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : 😆

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : Wait so this was her idea?

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : No. Bit early, I think. I kind of like it? Taking our time. No feeling of doubt or anxiety.

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : Well, I suggested dinner on my boat. She brought nibbly foods. I'm not sure who suggested dancing but I like it.

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : Wait wait wait wait you danced with her on your boat in front of God and everybody?

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : ... Ye-es.

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : Oh buddy have you got it bad

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : Not that anyone was paying attention.

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : You know how much you used to care about that?

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : It was a lot

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : >.> I still do. But.

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : Look.

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : I fucked up with Hyacinth. Made her think I didn't care a lot, something. I don't want to make that mistake a second time.

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : If it means terrifying myself on a regular basis, I'll... survive.

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : What's life without a little terror in a good cause?

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : Remember how you said once, that a girl comes on to a boat with a bottle of wine to look at the stars, it doesn't mean she wants to look at the stars?

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : I got it right this time. Granted, I supplied the wine. But, I got it right this time. Probably helped that I didn't buy the wine to look at stars, either.

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : A girl definitely never comes over with strawberries because she wants to eat strawberries

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : 🎶 Unless you're eating the same strawberry at the same time 🎶

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : Always a good move

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : I want us to play sometime. I mean, maybe... together. In front of a few friends or something.

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : You know I'm into it

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : Impress the hell out of her

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : And you know I'm terrified at the idea. But I want to. Yes. That.

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : I'm not -- you know me, I'm not the kind of guy who doesn't want his girl to ever talk to another bloke or something stupid like that. I just want to -- I don't know, make sure I'm her first choice.

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : Hell no you're not that kind of guy.

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : -flop- I do 'got it bad'.

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : So bad

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : It's adorable

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : So very bad.

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : It's not adorable, damnit. Am manly man. Big kitty. Meow.

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : Look at that little punim

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : Seriously I'm fucking thrilled

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : It's just... She's fun, she's smart, she can out-nerd me in multiple fields, she gets wanting alone time, she's not afraid to argue with me.

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : Not because I think you need to get laid though I totally do, just because you deserve some nice stuff in your life

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : Being in love is super nice

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : I'll cross that hurdle when we get there. I mean, getting laid is nice but so is dancing under the moon and not giving a shit whether anyone's watching. Might even argue the second one is a bigger deal, in some ways.

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : Also, I know it's silly, but -- I kind of want it to be like, you can go on Ravn's boat and it doesn't have to mean somebody's getting laid. It's a boundary thing.

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : Some people say, dance like nobody's watching. I say, dance like you're getting hundred dollar tips

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : 😆 I'm still at the first I think.

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : You a little bit screwed yourself, sailboats are inherently romantic

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : Hey, I didn't say no one could get screwed on my boat. I want to get screwed on my boat. Regularly.

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : Same

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : ... So I'm teaching you how to sail her, or?

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : I mean, you know what I mean, damnit

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : Hey look, you want to take himself out on the Vagabond and make him bark louder than the seals, be my guest. It can happen.

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : ABILDGAARD I'm fucking dying

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : Oh, so we discuss how to get me laid but not you? SHALL I LEAVE A PACK OF STRAWBERRIES IN THE FRIDGE?

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : I meant I want you to get laid on your boat a lot you yutz

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : Do strawberries go with tequila

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : Nothing goes with tequila but tears. Says I, who end up crying in a corner every time I have the damn thing.

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : I could leave a couple of bottles of good whiskey under the seatee, though.

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : I'm happy to discuss getting me laid, bring it on playa

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : Ravn Abildgaard, sexual counsellor. I don't kind of see it, not going to lie.

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : Seriously, though, you want to learn how to sail her, we can do it. You can keep talking to me about how to move things and open doors, and I'll talk about knots and directions and how to read the wind.

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : The one time we did talk about sex you got all awkward so I'm thinking maybe not

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : Aight it's a deal

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : Look, I come from a background of we do not discuss anything that happens between the knee and the neck, cut me some slack.

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : All I know is I want that girl to climb me like a kid in a set of monkey bars.

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : Fuck yes now we're cooking with gas

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : I'm so stupidly happy for you

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : I'm so stupidly happy for myself. And so determined to not fuck it up this time.

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : I put a dream catcher on my boat. And a few other things. You know. Just in case.

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : Happy for Ari too, she gets to date my best buddy, what a hunk!

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : I'm going to hold you to what you said. Just saying. If Benedikte turns up, you will help me deal with her. Because it's going to happen eventually. I don't get to do something like this, and it won't have consequences.

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : Bitch wants another round, fine by me

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : I don't know if you even understand but -- it's you saying that, that makes me dare to do this in the first place.

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : Because I'm silly about that girl. And I'd still be ready to pretend to not be, to let her pass me by, if I didn't think you'd have my back when the shit hits the fan.

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : You know what? I don't really understand. The things that haunt me ain't so literal. But I mean it.

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : Things got pretty literal at the diner when she thought I was making eyes at Gina Castro.

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : There's things I've done that are fucked up. But none of em are actual ghosts following me around

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : Everyone's done fucked up things. There are things in my past I'm not proud of, either. But this is a bit more literal. Like some bloke you argued with in jail turned up on your girl's doorstep.

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : ... Okay, bad example, because that bloke would be fucking himself over in your case, doing that, but you know what I mean.

(TXT to Ravn) Itzhak : I know just one thing. I would fight God for you

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : You know I wouldn't dare do this if I didn't know that. Right? I'd have talked myself out of it. Told myself the kind thing to do is to never let her know, let her get over her crush and find someone else with less ghosts.

(TXT to Itzhak) Ravn : I don't think I can fight God but if need be? I'll pick His pocket, steal the keys, and let you out of Hell.