2019-07-15 - Dr. Sigurd in the House

The day may only be warm, but Marius is perched on the couch wearing just shorts and low running socks, sweat glistening on his back, in his hair, and on his chest. His pitted-out t-shirt is currently spread out on the back of the couch behind him to protect it in case he leans back, but he's currently leaning forward instead, hovering over an iPad on the coffee table before him, a spiral-bound notebook with names and phone numbers written down next to it. "Nope. I'm pretty sure I'd go crazy at the Waffle House." Still job-hunting, apparently.

It's becoming a theme that there is half-naked Viking dudes on the couch all the time. Which is hella distracting on the best of days. Ash came home during the stupid hours of the morning that morning, tormented Jens, watched a random documentary, caught a few hours of sleep, and worked a short lunch shift. Which is why she's just now coming home again, this time dressed in her work uniform with a stuffed unicorn tucked under her arm.

Marius looks up as the door opens, giving a brief wave and then finishing writing down the Waffle House's number too. Because this half-naked Viking dude is being studious damn it. There have to be ways to tell them apart, after all. Looking up again, he sits up a bit, "Hey Ash. How was the lunch rush?" He spots the unicorn, blinks, "Did you adopt? If it poops in the house, you gotta clean it up. I'm getting it on the rental agreement." There's no rental agreement.

"Slow, but there was this couple in that had just been down to the boardwalk." Which doesn't explain anything, does it? Maybe not. The unicorn is wiggled in his direction before she pushes her shoes off, then wanders over to drop herself down next to him on the couch, "I'm giving Sparkle Butt to Astrid. It's a sign of my undying love for her. What are you doing though, Mister Naked?"

Marius says, "And... so... they weren't really hungry?" Marius guesses. "Just sitting around ordering iced tea and taking up a table? I mean, even if you don't need the table, that's a pain in the ass, right? Low tips." He looks to the unicorn, nodding slowly, "Sparkle Butt. That's a good name. You should get some of those glittery marshmallows to leave around behind him." He shows the classified section of the Gazette on the tablet, "And me, I'm job-hunting. Wheeeee. The exciting world of 'jobs beyond lawn care.'" There's a pause, and he can't resist, "And where's my sign of undying love? I thought it was share and share alike in this house?""

"No. They left me Sparkle Butt." Ash makes the unicorn dance across the air, complete with sound effects. When he mentions that she should leave glittery marshmallows around behind it she pauses, then nods, "Not a bad idea, yeah." The stuffed animal is tucked in against her side before she crosses her legs, "I'm not sure if I love you yet. I mean..." She tilts her head, taking a moment to exageratedly look him over, "I love looking at you."

"Ahhhh," that makes sense. "So you're regifting eternal love." When she looks him over, Marius seems to realize that he's half-naked. I mean, she totally said it before, but it didn't sink in. He glances down, and blushes, "Oh... um... sorry." Yes, there are definite differences between the Andersson brothers. Marius twists around to pull the shirt off the back of the couch, pulling the damp cloth back on, "I just got back in from a workout. I... uh, I probably should've showered first." Beat pause, and then he flashes a grin, "I mean, not that there isn't plenty of eye-candy around here, Ash, not with you prancing around."

There was something about undying love, so here's your chance Ash! Astrid comes in from the backyard, all dirty and delightful. She's wearing overworked jeans, tennis shoes that are more muddy than tennis, and a sage green t-shirt that has a cartoon Pluto on it emphasizing the little heart crater. Her hair is braided, tucked under a bandana, and she looks otherwise content as she bounces through the kitchen into the living room. "We have peas! Oh--" There's a shirtless Marius and an Ash with a unicorn. "Hi. There's a half-naked boy in our house. Did we special order that?"

"Don't get dressed on my account." Ash points out, but that is literally as far as she goes to prevent him from putting his shirt back on. The comment about her prancing around gets a look from her before she laughs, "Yeah. Okay." She agrees before getting to her feet, holding the unicorn out towards him, "Protect Sparkle Butt while I go and grab myself a drink." Or not! When Astrid turns up she takes back the unicorn and heads towards Ast, holding the unicorn out towards her, "I brought this for you, my love. I rescued him from the evils of lettuce kingdom."

Marius pauses with the shirt caught up just beneath his arms at Ash's mild protest and Astrid's special order comment. He looks around from one woman to the other, then chuckles, pulling the shirt the rest of the way on and giving the front a little wave. "Yup. Limited time offer. Please insert one dollar for more time." And then he realizes what that might sound like, and he blushes again, shaking his head and laughing, "Yeah okay yourself, Ash. Heya, Ast. Come on, Ast, tell Ash that she's good eye-candy. She doesn't believe me." There's only a moment's pause, and then he adds, "Come on, Ash, tell Ast that she's good eye-candy. I doubt she'd believe me."

"Gasp! For me?" Astrid bounces up to collect the unicorn. She snuggles it up with a big hug, and smooches its forehead and then smooches Ash's cheek. She loops an arm around Ash's waist, leaning against her to look at Marius. "Only a dollar? Wow, that's a good special." She wrinkles her nose up pleasantly to Marius. "He even blushes! I guess we will keep him." Then she looks to Ash at Marius's encouragement and she hipchecks Ash gently. "You're gorgeous. Don't believe anything Marius says. That whole 'fugly as a troll' comment was really just him being hangary. He needs a Snickers." Then she winks to Marius.

"We got a two for one special, when I got home from the library this morning Jens was out in the back yard naked." He wasn't naked. "His name is Sparkle Butt." Probably not Jens. Ash winds an arm around Astrid, and looks like she's about to say more before the fugly as a troll comment gets through to her simple, small brain. She blinks, then looks at Marius, "What...Fuck...that's not cool."

"One dollar, one m -- " Marius pauses, considering, " -- half minute. I gotta make rent somehow." He is not actually considering becoming a stripper. Of course, calling him out on blushing deepens the blush a little, and he flips Astrid off in a friendly manner. When she accuses him, he takes it in stride, nodding mournfully to Ash, "Yes, you're right. Not cool at all. Normally I would have gone with 'north end of a southbound horse.' My insult game was off, I apologize." He snorts softly, "Jens needs to learn that just being naked isn't art. Even for an Andersson." Pushing himself to his feet, he collects his notebook and his iPad, "Buuuuut... now that I've been called out, I'm going to get a shower."

"Half-minute? Not even worth it." Astrid leans against Ash easily, head resting against hers. "He really didn't say that." Beat. "It was Jens." Marius is awarded another wink before she turns to Ash, wiggling her unicorn happily. "Thanks for this. He's adorable. What's his name? It's Sparkle Butt, isn't it?" She then tilts her head to one side, playing up the deeply thoughtful look. "Hmm, as for naked Viking boys.. maybe we should advertise. Make it like a zoo attraction. Come by 9 Oak and see the naked Viking boys." She darts a mischievous look toward the retreating Marius, stepping forward to call after him, "It could be an art, baby! We could make it an art!" Whatever response she gets, Astrid still turns to Ash with her unicorn. "How was work?" Because while Ash was at work, Astrid was in class.

Does Ash have feelings? Honest to god, normal, every day girl feelings? It seems so, judging by the expression on her face as she stares after Marius, that very same look is turned on to Astrid as well. Wide eyes, mouth hanging slightly open, "Fugly troll....north end of a southbound horse." Ash moves towards the closest wall, grabbing at it before she sinks down onto the floor, that stunned look on her face not having changed any at all. Not even when Astrid begins passing that blame to Jens, instead she looks even more horrified before she chokes out, "He was painting me naked." The last word is spoken in a near sob before she throws herself face down onto the floor, arms covering over her head.

Astrid's eyes widen at Ash's reaction, and she bounces after her quickly so she can join her on the wall. "Oh, Ash. Cm'on. That was totally me trolling Marius, not you. You're beautiful and special." She slips down beside her and then ends up curled up on the floor with her, head on the hardwood. It's super not comfortable, but that's okay. She nudges closer to her, and she tilts her head. "Jens was painting you?" She gives Ash's side a little poke.

"Yeah, I got home and he was outside with one of his secret paintings." Ash pushes herself up onto her elbows, looking like nothing at all tragic just happened, "I got to see it, but that was because he didn't see me coming." Because he never shares those paintings, the asshole. "And it was some naked blonde and I was all...why you painting naked blondes. He went on this whole thing about how he doesn't know, but that it could be me." She gives Astrid a Look, "It was totally me." She props her chin on her hands, smiling at Astrid before she glances towards where Marius went before looking back, "So you two get much studying done last night after I left? Or todaaaaay."

When Ash pushes herself up, Astrid just shakes her head with amusement. "God, you're all drama." But she doesn't get up. Instead, she rolls onto her back beside Ash and tilts a glance up to her. When she gives the whole Jens story, she frowns with a slight furrow in her brow. "Huh, you think it was really you? I mean, he gets all weird about that secret painting stuff." She frowns. "Why was he painting you? You know, besides the whole thing that you're gorgeous." Then at the question, which she might dissect in a totally different way if she was really thinking about it, but she's not, so she honestly reports, "Some. Marius got distracted with some drawing, and I kinda started watching that Lucifer series on my phone. So... we both sorta checked out." Then she furrows her brows. "Um, why would we be studying today?"

Marius missed the traumatizing. He even missed that he's about to become a zoo exhibit (that's less important). He comes back down with a different set of shorts on, his hair slicked back and a new t-shirt in his hands. He hasn't put it on yet, but apparently he couldn't wait to get back down to the ladies of 9 Oak Street. "Studying? Uuuuuugh. Don't remind me." He blinks, then looks back to Astrid, "Oh yeah... you had that test today. How'd it go? Or is it this evening? Or online? I never got the deets." And then because he felt bad, he lumbers over to Ash's side, folding down to press a kiss to her temple, "You're beautiful, Ash, and I wouldn't ever say you looked like a troll or any end of a horse. Even a pretty horse."

"Uh huh." Ash replies cheerfully to Astrid, giving her this look of total unconvinced amusement. "But why..." She stops when the man himself makes a reappearance and she laughs at him, "I know." She doesn't refuse temple kisses though, instead she waggles her brows in Astrid's direction, "He's all wet and naked." Half naked.

"I will remind you because I'm ruthless." Astrid didn't really remind Marius, but she is ruthless. She continues to languish on the floor with Ash, tucked against her gently. She murmurs something to her friend that is mostly unintelligible, and then she peeks up a glance at Marius. He's still not wearing a shirt, and so she smiles. "Well, not all naked. He sadly has pants on. We obviously need to update our policies for our dress code." She props her cheeks in her hands, kicking her feet idly as she looks waaay up at Marius. "Could you be less tall right now, please?"

Marius looks from one woman to the other, "Wet and naked is a good way to go through life, Ash. Hasn't anyone ever told you that before?" But then he leans over to press a kiss to Astrid's temple too, "Just because it wouldn't be fair for only one of you to get one." Turning away, he heads back to the couch to drop heavily onto it, "See Ash? Share and share alike. I want a unicorn." The t-shirt languishes in his hands as he spreads them to either side, "That better, Astrid? Just wanted me sitting down? Because I know you're not gonna chop me off at the knees. And any time you want to update house rules to everybody has to go topless and pantsless, go right ahead."

Just speaking as someone who is still wearing her uniform, Ash has a whole lot of opinions on being topless and pantless, so she points out, "I'll begin working on the revisions tonight. Ast will review, and we shall update you on the changes to the house rules tomorrow." Ash scoots so that she can throw a leg and an arm across Astrid, her other arm folding up against the floor so that she can rest her cheek against it. "Fine, I'll get you a unicorn. But on the condition that you have to take Ast to and from her test tomorrow, because I can't, and she needs the moral support." She then leans in to press a loud, smacking kiss against Astrid's cheek, "And I don't know why he was painting me. He said he didn't know, just that was how his weird method worked." And to loop Marius in to the topic she glances towards him, "Your brother was painting me naked."

Astrid actually chokes on a laugh at Marius's merry reply, and she's about to say something before she's being kissed on the temple, and she laughs softly. "Ugh. You Viking Boys are the worst." Then she snuggles up with Ash comfortably, tucking her head against hers as they kind of mould with the floor. When Ash promises to get Marius a unicorn, Astrid gasps. But then something thoughtful settles onto her features. "Well, I guess Sparkle Butt could use a friend." Ash's terms to the agreement has her laughing. "Look, I actually do know how to drive myself, and take a test by myself, and while I will miss our post-exam frapp, I'm a big girl. I can go without the whipped cream, and chocolate, and coffee, and--" She stops. "I can do it." Then she glances back toward Marius briefly and then to Ash. "You think it was something weird?"

It's a good thing Marius isn't drinking anything, because Ash's casual catching up causes him to sputter. When he (somewhat) recovers, he stares at her, "Like... full-on Titanic? Where's you get the big sapphire?" That was a sapphire, right? After a moment, he shrugs, "I'm crushed. I thought I was the only one for you." Beat pause, "Well, and Astrid, but my heart will go on." He sticks his tongue out at Astrid in response to the gasp, "Nyah Nyah! I get a Sparkle Butt too." It takes a moment for his words to sink in, "Don't say anything. Just..." he presses his face into one big hand, "...don't say anything." Looking up, he draws in a breath and then lets it out, "You can't go without whipped cream, chocolate, and coffee, Astrid. You know that no Seattleite can survive 12 hours without coffee just as well as I do. I can drive you if you don't mind the bike. Kind of a beautiful day for it." As to whether Jens painting Ash is weird, he just shrugs, "Unless he's painting his personal spank bank, I don't know that it's weird..." but that's just his opinion, man.

"No more weird than my writing." Which is perfectly normal. For real. Seriously. "Not full-on Titanic, though, no. Like..." She does a quick check through all the art history she remembers, because this is as close to art anything she's got. "More like Bosch or Memling. Or no...maybe like Goya." She reaches up to start petting at Astrid's hair, "So I seriously hope that it was not his personal spank bank, because if so then he's like...way off the rails, and I might have to do something drastic. Like take him for coffee." She leans in, whispering loudly to Astrid, "You're still my favorite."

"Ash and I come in a set, so you get one of us, you get both of us, and we're definitely too much for you to handle." Astrid though lets that whole teasing thing drop as she settles back onto the floor, listening to Ash and Marius with a tilt of her head. Ash's various artist comparisons has her looking confused. "Goya?" Then she is rolling up to brace onto her hands, tilting her head slightly. "I don't mind the bike," she says offhandedly to Marius, and then she looks back to Ash. "Okay, so... did you ask him, or did he do a Jens and kind of just freak about it?"

"Oh, do you write slash fiction too?" Exactly what 'too' is referring too, the grinning Marius leaves up to interpretation. His eyes glaze over at the mention of the other artists though, and then he looks over to Astrid, his eyebrows lifting in sharp, silent question. Too much to handle? Really? He holds that expression for a moment, then lets it soften into a grin again, "Naw. I'm sure you would both be flattered to be in my baby brother's spank bank, but I don't think he'd be dumb enough to do," he glances to Ash a moment, "crazy fancy," since he has no idea of what a Bosch, Memling, or Goya looks like, "paintings of people in it where anyone could see them."

"No..." Ash gives Marius this weird look, like she's trying to figure out who or what he's writing slash fiction about. "Supernatural, right?" She just takes a wild stab, one that ends in her rolling partially over to pull her phone out of her pocket. As she goes through looking up something she points out, "You really couldn't handle both of us, Marius. Well, I mean, maybe he could, but lets all be honest, we'd be more focused on each other, and then he'd go sit in a corner looking ignored and pitiful." As soon as she finds what she's looking for she holds it out to Astrid, showing her Goya's Satan Devouring His Son. "It was for sure not for a spank bank."

"Too?" But then Astrid is shaking her head as she pushes herself upright. "I gotta go cram some studying in." She gives Marius's shoulder a punch. "Be ready to leave like at 10 AM tomorrow. And wear a shirt." Then she brightens for Ash, leaning in to peck her forehead before she scrabbles up to her feet with a little bounce. "And Ash's right. We would definitely make you look sad and pitiful." She leans down to peck a kiss to the top of Marius's head. Then she pauses in her retreat to take a look at Goya's picture, and she opens her mouth, closes it, and shakes her head. "Whoa. With that, I go study." She backs up slowly, hands still up, and then she pivots to bounce up the stairs.

"Titanic," Marius's grin gets even bigger and broader, "IceShip forever." His eyes flicker between the two women, and mischief dances on his lips, "Just the way the 'berg penetrates the ship, like its going to tear her open, but she's groaning like it's so good..." But then his blushes and laughter overwhelm the words, and he shakes his head, finally pulling the t-shirt over his head to hide some of the bright red color. He rocks under the punch to the shoulder, rubbing his arm where Astrid struck, "Crop-tops count as shirts, right? And if you two wanna... I'm fine just watching..." Oh no, more blushes, and he ducks his head, just in time to get a kiss on top of it. His hand loops out easily to rest at Astrid's waist, "Ten o'clock. You got it, Ast."

"IceShip...." There is a serious moment where Ash tries to decide if this is a real thing, or just some weird made up shit that Marius is trotting out for her. Either way without Astrid on the floor with her there isn't much reason to stay, so she gets to her feet, tucking her phone into her pocket before she dusts herself off, heading over towards the couch. There's a look for where Ast went, then Ash reaches over a hand to pat his thigh, "You know...crop-tops totally count as shirts."

Marius grins over at Ash, leaning over to bump his shoulder into hers and then slumping back in the couch, "Yeah... I know. But then I'd have to have a crop top, wouldn't I?" Narrowing his eyes, he pokes her shoulder with one thick finger, "And no, you don't get to come anywhere near my shirts with any scissors. I can rock a lot of stuff, but I'll leave the crop-tops to you ladies, since you look so good in them." There's a pause, "You really got Jens to talk about one of his paintings?"

"Yeah." Ash lifts her hands up, "I wasn't going to cut off any of your shirts, just say you could borrow one of mine. It might fit a little tight, though." Or a lot of tight. When he asks about the painting she nods, her brows waggling at him a moment before she kicks her feet up on the coffee table. "I got home from the library, and he was out back painting. So it wasn't that I got him talking about it as I saw it, he was real quick to cover it up, but I saw enough of it. Blonde, naked girl on fire with creepy monsters from the shadows reaching for her."

Marius reaches over to pluck at the side of her shirt below her ribs, "Yeeeeeeah... just a little tight." He stretches out his arm across the back of the couch behind her, a grin starting to build... only to fall away at the description of the painting. "Wow. Yeah. That's not sexy at all. I mean, I don't wanna kink shame, but, yeah, not sexy at all. Pretty freaky, in fact." There's a pause, and then he's grinning again, "You want to sit on Dr. Sigurd's couch and talk about it?"

"I don't think there was any kinky shit about it." Ash points out, but then she twists around to fling her legs over the couch, settling her head on his lap, "Dr. Sigurd." She looks up at him, batting her eyelashes at him, "I really want to talk to you about sex, because this has come up several times, and I really, really, really think that is something we should talk about."

Marius nods as she settles in for shrinking, dropping his arm off the back of the couch to her hip, only to sputter at her stated desire, shaking his head in a combination of laughter and a blush. Clearing his throat and composing himself so carefully that the laughter lurking just beneath the surface is plain and clear, he nods, "So, sex is a positive sing," it's the bad German accent that makes 'thing' sound like 'sing,' "Unt is good to have with people you trust, so long as they are hot as hell and DTF too." 'Hot as hell' and 'DTF' were never meant to be said in bad German accents, and Marius cracks up again.

"I'm pretty sure that I can make sure the first part is for real." For real, for real. Ash is perfectly fine with bad German accents, though, managing to keep her expression straight despite his laughter. "But the DTF part of things is a whole lot harder to manage, and it shouldn't be." She waves her hands wildly at herself, "I'm gorgeous, and I keep trying. I keep flinging myself. Maybe it is utter desperation...no one like desperate, right?"

Marius drops the hell out of the bad German accent like a bad habit. "Oh, shit... is this a semi-serious conversation?" His free hand brushes blonde hair back from Ash's face, "It shouldn't be. And no, desperate isn't particularly attractive. But you are. And smart. And funny." There's a beat pause, and he smiles just a little, "Have you tried making sure that all of your housemates are out first?" This time, the pause is more thoughtful, "Have you tried just being up-front and asking, Ash?"

"I haven't in so many words, no." Ash rolls her eyes at him, "I did things like, point out that I was interested...seriously, I mean, short of actually saying will you fuck me I can't be any more clear, I think." She folds her hands over her stomach, then crosses her legs at the ankle before she glances towards the stairs, weighing options for a moment, "I couldn't ask Ast to leave, though. Maybe I'll just ask her to join, way better anyways."

Marius rolls his eyes, "Ugh. Dudes are totally blind, aren't they?" That should absolutely be 'aren't we,' but he's blind. The suggestion that Astrid join in with whomever Ash might be chasing has his brows lifting though, "Huh. I always thought that was you two just teasing. I mean, each other and us." Considering, he shrugs slowly, "I don't know. That might be a lot of pressure for a first time with someone. Unless it's someone Ast knows and likes too. I'm pretty sure she'd step out for a night though, if you needed to get some and didn't want to give the poor guy -- or gal -- a heart attack." And then the consideration fades away to a grin, and he gives his thigh a little bounce under her shoulders, "So do I get to know who you're crushing on, Ash?"

"Maybe it is just us teasing, maybe it's not. I guess you'll never know." Ash replies with a smile up at him, her hands lifting up, fingers curling together as she bats her lashes at him, then she drops her hands again. "I'm sure that she would, and I'm sure you would. But there's really not any reason for it, pretty sure that the entire thing is a big fat no from him anyways." She the pauses, adding. "Guy, just for reference. Tall, little wild. But that's all you're going to get from me about who. Plus, I'm not crushing. I just can't stand him saying no."

Marius chuckles at the continued teasing, shaking his head in amusement -- and shifting the position of his lap under her head a little. Just for safety's sake. He flashes a grin, "Oh, I have to leave too? Well hell, that's right out then..." Giving her hip a nudge with the heel of his hand, he shakes his head, "I don't know, Ash. I'm no good at this shit. You saw how me and Cathy blew up." He sighs a little, even as his lips curve into a faint little grin, "And tall, little wild? Sounds familiar." His head tilts slightly to one side as he looks down at the lovely features looking up at him, and he chuckles, "So what do you plan to do, Ash? About this tall, wild man you want to roll around in the sheets and make sweaty-sweaty fun-time with?"

"You and Cathy blew up because she wasn't good enough for you, way too short, and those teeth." Ash lifts a hand up, holding two fingers curled in front of her mouth like two buck-teeth. "Plus, I'm pretty sure she got jealous of a certain someone and bailed in the end because she knew that she wasn't as amazing as that certain someone." She's probably not talking about herself here, either. "But I don't know what I'm going to do, nothing, probably. Pine away in epic frustration, seems like a great plan. Or...there's that guy in my class, Bobby. He's pretty hot."

"Her teeth were not that bad..." Marius pauses, then admits a little ashamedly, "I thought they were cute at first." But then she's getting more serious, and he shifts again, licking his lips, "I don't know why she'd be jealous of you guys." Yup, he's pluralizing 'someone' quite neatly. "I mean, I know why she'd be jealous of you guys, since you're both awesome, and tall, and have perfect teeth. But if I can't have a girlfriend because you and Ast are too awesome, that just blows." Beat pause, and a little color highlights his cheeks, "And not in the awesome way." Her suggested course of action has him frowning again, and he rolls his broad shoulders, "I don't know, Ash. If Bobby's in for being a Right Now guy, I don't see anything wrong with that part. But pining away sounds like it would suck. What's wrong with just asking the guy if he's DTF?"

"I don't think you can't have a girlfriend, Dr. Sigurd. I think you just have to find the right one." Everyone knows who she's talking about. "If you get that right person than tada, they are going to be happy, you'll be happy, everyone'll be happy." She even goes so far as to clap a little before reaching up, trying to grab his face to scrunch his cheeks together, baby-talking at him, "Yes we would. We'd all be happy." It's a nice, neat way of side-stepping her own response, because clearly she's not answering the what's wrong question.

Marius doesn't know who Ash is talking about. He probably should, but he doesn't. He opens his mouth to comment, and then his face is getting scrunched up, and he ends up making fishy-face and talking very awkwardly, "Den you bett'r keep an eye o't f'r this pe'fect woman." And then he gooses at her side, trying to pull his face back, "Now up, up! I'm afraid our time's up, 'cause I've got rent to pay, and I need to start calling people about jobs. And don't think I didn't notice that dodge."

The goose at her side has a violent reaction, and she jerks herself up off the couch with a laugh, "Oh shit..." She waves a hand towards him, "Fine, Dr. Sigurd, you go and shake that adorable ass for that rent money. I'll keep an eye out for your pefect woman, and take into consideration your advice about the hot guy."