2020-08-07 - Axes and Ohs

Friday, August 7 falls precisely between two exceedingly important birthdays: those of Rhys Evans and Nicole Stein. As such, it is the perfect day for Sparrow Jones to collaborate with her favorite partner in (not actual) crime Joey Kelly and arrange a (very planned and entirely consensual) abduction of their favorite pair of leos. It's a bit of a drive, but getting out of Gray Harbor is always a good idea when celebrating something important. It's just safer. And, really, Sparrow's prepared the perfect playlist for the trip, full of songs that they'll all recognize and sing along with. Hopefully. Really, it's very gracious of Joey to have granted her control over the stereo. There hasn't been any booze yet, unless there was pre-gaming before they hit the road, but there's a promise of beer when they get where they're going.

The building is big, hosting both a brewery, complete with its own little pub, and an axe-throwing venue. Was it a good idea to put the alcohol and the axes so close together? Who knows! It's here. They're here. And tonight's gonna be a blast! When the engine cuts off, Sparrow explains, "They won't let us throw axes if we're drunk, so. I recommend violence first, dinner after?" The purple-haired drummer is practically vibrating with excitement.

Joey loves having a partner in crime who is not a crime partner. That means when the PD really really really misses him and takes him out on an involuntary date to the station events and cool shit still gets planned. As for the drive? Well Itzhak hooked him up with that sweet new Camaro since everything else he owns got broke (sigh), and the playlist? Well he too mumbles along with it. "Axes first, drinking after, violence? Yes." Really there's a tiny prayer of please don't let people be dumb. "I will warn you now I have never done this before."

It is not the first time Nicole has been 'kidnapped' by Sparrow, nor Joey. A first to be 'kidnapped' with Rhys though! She is quite thrilled to be getting out of Gray Harbor for the day. There's a lot going on there that makes celebration difficult.

But of course Sparrow has the perfect playlist... who would ever think she wouldn't?

"But why won't they?" she asks about not being able to throw axes while drunk. "What could possibly go wrong?" She smiles then nods though. "Axes, then dinner, sounds good to me. Thank you," she says to both Sparrow and Joey, "for dragging us out here for this." Rhys gets a bright smile and she tosses to him: "Happy Birthday, to my fellow Leo. I had no idea you were quite as awesome as me!" Shaking her head to Joey, she notes, "I haven't either. I'll be surprised if the thing actually sticks."

"I never got a kidnapping for my birthday before," Rhys remarks with intentionally overstated glee when he's picked up, though since there's been no explanation of what they're being abducted for (aside from celebration and general awesomeness of some description), there's a thrum of excitement beneath it that makes it require less of an exaggeration than otherwise. Some might complain about sitting in the back, but hey, someone's gotta, and a) he takes up the least room and b) c'mon, what's not to like about being in the backseat with Sparrow? And Sparrow's music, which seems to have been well-chose for its purpose in his case, 'cause yeah, he knows all those songs and is 100% on board with the sing-along.

The mention of the axes brings the earlier glee even closer to just genuine, a laugh breaking free. "Oh, c'mon, why not drink first? They just need to point us the right way and keep everyone else behind a decent blast shield. Maybe with restraints, depending how drunk we are." Tch, killjoys! Not that anything's actually been killed. Yet. "Thanks," he agrees, "and happy birthday to you, too. I'm amazed we didn't just instinctively sense each other's true level of inherent awesomosity." For no very good reason, as he's unbuckling, he leans over to steal a quick kiss from Sparrow before adding, "I haven't thrown an axe before either, but I'm looking forward to discovering a hitherto unknown talent. Or beginner's luck."

The likelihood of anyone taking their clothes off on stage tonight is probably pretty slim. The Sparrow Jones Personal Abduction Service seeks to privde a unique experience with each excursion! Which may be why she chirps, "Me either!" in regards to their intended activity. This is not Phil Tested, but definitely Phil Approved. In theory. Let's see how she feels about it after they've had a go. She leans in to nudge her shoulder against Rhys' when he proposes adding restraints to the mix, the playful waggle of her brows and devilish grin implying she might be willing to oblige if the people running the axe-throwing establishment won't. Really, she's been on her best behavior back here, focused on more singing than groping. It's not entirely her fault that she's so easily distracted so early in the evening. Blame Rhys. Blame that kiss that leaves her grinning like an idiot as they all start pouring out of the camaro to head on in. For the moment, the small bag she's brough along--and defended against any attempts at peeking--is left in the Camaro for post-axe-throwing opening. If there are gifts, there might be cake. If there's cake, there'll probably be singing. "I sensed your mutual inherent awesomosity," the gemini points out with pride. "You're welcome."

Joey mumbles to Rhys, "I was going to make you ride in the trunk as per protocol but I got outvoted." He leaves everything else checked in the car; keys in pocket, but pistol under his seat. he's double checking everything. They're out of town. At least he's an unknown factor here which means maybe just enjoying celebrating with friends. He doesn't look but agrees with a solemn expression, "She does that. I doubted her once. Once. Still regretting it." They walk and Joey's arm swings around Nicole, thumb hooking in her beltloop and pressing a kiss to her temple. "Happy birthday, beautiful." Deadpan he says, "You too, Nicole." Oh he is fighting not to snicker but he lets the grin widen. "Sparrow the reason you been makin playlists behind my back?" This is the rare and elusive amused Joey face.

"I've been kidnapped.. sorta. But, for other reasons. This is the first time I am celebrating my birthday though, at all, in a long long long time." Smiling at Rhys as she moves to get out of the car, she says, "maybe we subconsciously sensed it in the way two predators sense their power and we just needed to give each other space for a while. That would explain why we have such a difficult time just... you know.. hanging out. Ever." Chuckling, she grins at Sparrow. "Why do you always have to be so awesome that I have to thank you. I adore you, Bird." She rounds the car to approach Joey, leaning in as his arm goes around her. "I wasn't about to let you put Rhys in the trunk. Not yet. Ask me another time." She winks towards Rhys then looks up to Joey, chuckling at his birthday wishes. "Thank you, babe." Her eyes go wide then and a blush creeps onto her cheeks. "No! I mean... she has good taste in music and we enjoy listening to it together, sometimes in the bathtub, but... that playlist was just.. me." Joey is amused, Nicole is sheepish, lifting a hand to cover her face as she smiles and shakes her head.

"Well, me too, but never for my birthday," Rhys replies, "Which is clearly different!" He gives Sparrow a wink for her brow-waggle, and claims her hand once they've disembarked, twining fingers with hers. He doesn't appear to be leaving anything in the car, but then, he didn't seem to bring anything but himself, either.

"You might be right," he tells Nicole, "And meanwhile, the Sparrow gets a good bird's-eye view to size us up. Sounds about right." Riding in the trunk? "Man, and I'm pretty sure I got that unlocking it from the inside thing down, now, too," he says woefully, shaking his head, "I guess I'll just have to test it out next time. Uh, warn Rosencrantz you might need a replacement, though." The grin sneaks out again, and he bumps his shoulder once against Sparrow's as they walk, with a quiet snort at Joey's arrangement of birthday greetings. "Thanks, handsome."

The amused Rhys face is not particularly rare nor elusive, but it's there to take in the sheepish discussion of surreptitious playlists. And bathtubs.

"I'll take the credit," Sparrow chirps in regards to playlist inspiration, which should be evidence enough that she was entirely uninvolved in that endeavor. There might be some amused little tch for Joey's suggestion of regret and Nicole's reference to other reasons for abduction, but she offers no elaboration. She knows exactly how damned well that kidnapping went. "Ego," she answers with a helpless shrug to Nicole. "I learned it from my leos." She blows a kiss to the blonde one to echo her adoration while she sinks in closer to the ginger, happily squeezing the hand that's claimed hers. As an aside, she notes to Rhys, "I've got at least three bathtub playlists." It sounds an awful lot like an invitation. At some point before they head inside, maybe right around while Rhys is speaking of his skill in getting himself out of cramped spaces, there might be a faintly worried look toward Joey vaguely begging for someone to save her from her own very bad, terrible, awful ideas.

Inside, the brewery is spacious and open, drop lighting hanging from high ceilings. It smells of hops and woodsmoke, and conversation reverberates into a pleasant buzz. A bar opposite the entrance serves as a central point for the place, the kitchen seen through a wide window behind it. To the left, tables occupy much of the space, though there's an open area to one side that looks reserved for brewery tours or demos, a door in the back surely leading to where the magic happens. To the right, there's a big sign over a door leading to the axe-throwing area, and that's where Sparrow herds everyone, announcing a reservation for four for Phil Jones. They're lead to a well-lit area set up like a two-lane shooting range, semi-private, with laughter and cheers from other sections echoing through the dividing walls. They're instructed in proper safety and axe-throwing, the hostess making it seem so very easy as she emphasizes throwing it harder than you think you need to. The young woman promises she'll be right over there watching if they need anything. Or if they start doing anything dangerous. And then they're left to themselves with a bunch of throwing axes and two wooden targets several yards away. "Who wants to try first?"

Joey waggles his eyebrows back to Rhys. "Welcome." Green eyes take in the details as they roll up in boss style. They're getting used to it. Joey, being inherently off-putting, lets Sparrow and Nicole communicate with the wait staff. Now he's sizing up form on the people flinging steel at the targets. "It's a different fighting style for killing trees. Handy." Looking at them he grins to Nicole, "You wanna go first? School us on how to do this?"

Upon entering, Nicole looks around the place, taking in all it has to offer. "This is awesome, Sparrow. How did you find this place?" She follows her and the hostess towards the ax-throwing area. Paying close attention to the instructions, she mimics throwing an ax a few times, as if imagining how it will feel. However, when Sparrow asks who wants to go first, the hairdresser's eyes go wide again. "Uhhhh..." Joey's mention of fighting trees has her laughing lightly. "I am pretty sure this is not the place to... do things." You know, things. She isn't even sure she CAN do things here. "But, sure!"

She heads over to the axes and picks one up. She feels the weight of it in her hand and takes a breath, trying to calm her nerves, because yes, she is nervous. "Okay! Here goes nothing!" She throws it, precisely how they were shown, and much to her surprise, the ax tumbles through the air and strikes the target, embedding itself solidly. It's not a bullseye, or even close, but it was way better than she expected! She jumps up and spins back towards the group in one movement. "Did you see that? I did it!"

"We do make stellar role models," Rhys declares airily when the ego is blamed on them, and regarding the bathtub playlists, "...three, huh?" It sounds an awful lot like an acceptance. He seems to miss the danger of her terrible ideas, left to live in blissful ignorance and possibly mortal peril as they continue on their way.

Everything about this place currently meets with Rhys's approval, with the possible exception of not being able to try all those various beers until post-sharp-missile time. On the other hand, however: sharp missile time!

He's not as inclined to hang back from chatting to the staff as Joey, but to be fair, he's also a lot less inherently threatening than Joey by most peoples' measure. Proper safety and axe-throwing, got it. Like Nicole, he gets a couple mimics of the overall movement in, arching a brow. Okay, seems doable. "I dunno that killing trees actually counts as a fighting style," he remarks to the other man, "Unless you get your enemy to stand real still and let you have at his ankles, I guess. Which, nice technique if you can swing it!" More blissful ignorance. Must be nice not to glimmer in GH, some days.

He watches closely as Nicole makes her attempt, with an enthusiastic, "Nice!" when her axe thunks right in. He lifts his free hand to offer a high-(okay medium-)five before releasing Sparrow's and moving to claim an axe for his own attempt. He hefts it a couple times to judge that weight, tries that mimed imitation once without throwing to see how it feels, then gives it an actual toss, taking that 'use more force' advice into consideration. Even so, there's a flicker of surprise as he watches it fly well and thunk hard into the target -- not a bullseye either, but closer to the center than he expected. The flicker turns almost immediately into a wide grin, and a pair of fingerguns for the target that turn into an exaggeratedly triumphant lift of arms as he turns back to the others.

"At least." Sparrow flashes a low-lidded look Rhys' direction, but it doesn't linger long with all the moving and learning and so much to see. She says all of nothing on the topic of tree-slaying, not sure if Joey's making a joke or referencing something awful that happened in the Firefly Forest, but when Nicole advises prudence against doing things? No, she doesn't say anything about that either, but her mouth does open... and then wisely closes. The impish look she angles toward Rhys transmits just plenty about the things she might be thinking about doing. Several of which probably are inappropriate here.

But Nicole's stepping up to snag an axe, that prompt enthusiasm for this silliness earning a squeak of delight from the night's organizer. And a proud hoot when the axe thuds solidly into the wooden target. "So goddamned badass," she croons in appreciation. Which is more than she says for Rhys' effortless throw. But he's got her applause, now that her hands are free. And a look that likely says more than she could respectfully manage with words. She bumps her elbow gently into him as she moves past. Plucking up one of the axes, she looks to Joey to wordlessly ask if he's ready to step up, too. Then, after a couple of shallow test strokes, she lets it fly, metal embedding in wood with a good thunk. Arms go up triumphantly as she declares, "Fuck! That feels good!" on a breath of laughter. Turning to the others, she asks, "We gonna keep this all nice and friendly or make a wager?"

Joey watches and both eyebrows jump up impressed, "Fuuuuuuck, baby remind me never to make you aaaaaaangy. Hot damn, woman!" He leans over and steals a kiss admitting, "I might not be able to throw after that... or walk anywhere. Makin my jeans fit funny. Not a fair way to win but I approve." Sparrow mentions a wager though and he looks to Rhys with a wry grin and back to Sparrow. "Aight, but something cool. Not like cash or something. I'm in." Is this Joey actually having fun? This is Joey outside of Gray Harbor. Wonder of wonders.

He does have to give his boy Rhys some props there. "Niiiice and yoooou have never gone Christmas tree hunting with me if you don't think it's not. Next year I'll take you. You'll want an ax and your gun." Sparrow thought gets a fistbump. "A'ight how I do this?" He waits and looks to the three of them and wonders "Where'm I letting go here?" okay." He waits for conformation and then space to be clear and gives it a try. The man with the hulked out arms gives the thing a whip at the target. It's off center and high but it hits with a solid THUD. Not as great as the others and he admits, "I really do NOT get the point of letting go of your weapon. It's like disarming yourself and helping the other guy out. This is..tricky."

Taking that high/medium-five from Rhys, she comments, "you might be surprised by the antics of trees and how they fight. Bastards tried to hurt my man." She smiles over to Joey then and says, "they paid for it though. No more branch swinging from them!" At Sparrow's remark about being badass, she smiles and wiggles her rear. "And I am not even wearing my 'Badass pants'!"

She heads further back, away from the 'strike zone' so to speak, going up to Joey to give his cheek a kiss right before he then steals one from her lips. "I will remind you, babe. Anytime I feel you are about to." She winks then looks around. "I feel like this is missing something. Like, if I go bowling, I get to swig a beer in between... I need something to swig. We can have soda, right?" She watches Rhys make his throw then, applauding and offering him an "excellent!" then mimics his finger guns, cuz... I mean... finger guns. How can you not? Sparrow's throw strikes well and Nicole shouts, "woo! Teach that target!" With a glance towards Joey at the talk of a wager she looks back to Sparrow. After all, her bestie is the one with all the fun ideas. She smacks Joey's ass and says, "go get'em, tiger. Show that target who is boss. She watches, admiring his form and cheering when his axe hits. It most assuredly hits hard, even if not exactly on target for a bullseye. "Think of it like a boomerang... or um, ninja stars. They have to be thrown to be used properly!"

Rhys gives a tiny wink to that impish look, because inappropriate things to think about doing are 100% contagious, but hey, there are axes here to throw. Nicole's; his own, followed by a laugh at that invitation to Christmas tree hunting. "Awesome. I'll put it on my calendar," he assures. And when it hits Sparrow's turn and her turn hits the target so soundly in turn, he whoops once, and steps in even as she turns, wrapping his arms around her waist and lifting her briefly to turn her himself. Triumph!

"Wager," he replies promptly, as though there were really no need for such a silly question, "Though, I dunno, you're not gonna bet against me, right? Learned your lesson on that one? Although I guess I couldn't complain if I won another day or some such." He clicks his tongue, with a small headshake. "I should've tried to get that first one to hit the target next lane over instead, shark you all in." As though that first success weren't the precisely the beginner's luck he'd expressed hoping for.

"Maybe it's double or nothing," he suggests to Joey, "Either you throw it right and they're down before they can get in range to hurt you back, or you don't and now they're mad and got an axe. Incentive." A grin. "And I still vote beer, but yeah, no one could complain about us drinking soda, right?"

"You're what makes those pants badass, beautiful," Sparrow croons with a wink to her future wife, letting just the barest hint of a leer creep into her smile, a flirtatious tease that swiftly disappears behind a brighter smile at the affection shared between Nicole and Joey. It's not too different from the brilliance she shares with Rhys when he scoops her up, a giddy giggle masking momentary startlement at no longer having feet in contact with the floor. She keeps close once she's reunited with the ground, leaning in a little like he might save her should it happen again, as if he weren't the perpetrator in the first place.

"A wager," she echoes, certain this isn't at all an awful idea. Especially once her previous failure is pointed out. "I mean. It's not like you're good at collecting," sounds almost like a taunt, rendered more pointedly so by a little nip at Rhys' cheek. With a glint of mischief in her eyes, she looks to the others and declares, "I propose we pair up" Though she leaves just how those pairings will be decided entirely ambiguous, up to the others to decide. "And the winning pair gets a day of pampering from the losing pair."

It's a dramatic note to be interrupted on, but the host who had shown them how to throw axes peeks her head in and wonders, "Did I hear you talking about drinks? As long as no one in your group is visibly intoxicated, beer and cider are allowed. No hard liquor. Can I get you anything?" Oh, look! There's even a list of the beers on tap on the wall behind them. Looks like somebody read an outdated FAQ.

Joey cannot talk, making on the Amazonian blonde that puts up with all of his bullshit. "She's..." another kiss shamelessly stolen with a wry grin, "not wrong. You're more dangerous out of them really." His weight shifts between both feet leaving Nicole taller than him by a bit which the 5'10 bruiser is bothered by not at all.

The waitress comes over and makes offers and there is a pause where he remarks, "That feels considerably unwise...I'll have whatever stout you got." Unwise but not off the menu nor turned down. His thumbs hook i n Nicole's belt loops and he confers, with his infinitely nicer half, "What'chu think? I could be up to kickin a lil ass or gettin schooled today. Sure." These are his friends so only now does sportsmanship really really count.

“I don’t know... “ Nicole looks over towards Sparrow as wagers are discussed. “I am trying to decide if it would be more fun to chill with my bestie while the boys pamper us, let it be girls vs guys... or if it would be better to see how Rhys and Sparrow might decide to pamper us.” Her lips twist slightly and she hmms. “Might be dangerous territory if I let Sparrow give me a massage or something.” She flashes the lavender haired beauty a smile and a wink.

“A Corona?” She asks to the waitress. It’s her go-to, beer wise, so hopefully they can oblige her request. Both Sparrow and Joey comment about her amazing leather pants. Smiling, she’s about to comment back until Joey makes her blush. Turning, she briefly hides her face against his shoulder before deciding instead to give it a bit of a bite through his shirt.

“So yeah.... how do we decide teams?”

Rhys is good with Sparrow keeping close, and keeps an arm around her to encourage this, while neither of them are hurling bladed weapons. Her maybe-(probably-)taunt gets a snort, and a grin full of playful arrogance. "I'm great at collecting. I always make sure my investments reach their full and peak potential before I cash them in, Miss Jones." He retaliates for her nip, vengeance wrought on the side of her neck rather than her cheek. It could be simply because the height difference puts it right there... but it probably isn't.

He straightens up a little with a small throat clearing and overstated innocent look up and around at nothing and no one when the host peeks in again, not actually selling either embarrassment or repentance very well, particularly with the brightening at the offer made. "Stout sounds good," he decides, with a nod at Joey. "Thanks," he adds, and once the woman's gone, it's back to the issue of pairings, and specifically to Nicole.

"What, being on my team isn't an option? No Monarchs of the Jungle against the worshipful subjects? I'm hurt, Stein. Wounded." He shakes his head, adding a click of his tongue just for emphasis, then gives both Sparrow and Joey appraising looks. "On the one hand, definitely something to be said for lovely handmaidens catering to our every whim," he muses to the latter, just a flicker of a sidelong glance to Sparrow making blatant how much the remark is probably actually for her (questionable) benefit. "And on the other, no offense, man, but I'm way less interested in giving you triumphant kisses." He tilts his head a bit, giving all three of the others assessing looks. He might be considering the benefits. He might be calculatig odds. Either way, he ends up on, "On the gripping hand, congratulatory kisses are probably just as good, and then we get both. Gonna vote boys against girls."

Sparrow's giddy giggling at Rhys' well-placed retribution is preceded by a squeak loud and sharp enough that she's blushing rather guiltily when the hostess comes by. She chirps a quiet, "Good," as her head dips against his shoulder in a futile attempt to hide that all too bright color. It'll fade in a moment. Until then, she adds, "That plum sour?" to the drink orders. The waitress repeats back, "Two stouts, a sour and a pale lager," with a nod to Nicole at the last, assuring it should be close... and that she can try something else if it's not quite right. The brewery has its own beers, after all.

By the time the quartet is left alone again, Sparrow's hold on the accountant has loosened as she listens to the back-and-forth brainstorming about how to pair up for the competition. Brows arch high in challenge toward the end of Rhys' reasoning. "I appreciate that you think I'mma be a gracious loser. Sure hope you're willing to live up to that standard yourself, handsome." After a wink his way, she looks to Nicole to see if she's in for the girls-v-boys set up, adding with a flirtatious dip of dark lashes, "We can save the massage for later," before setting into more specific terms for the wager. "Best two out of three, each round consisting of two throws each, scoring for proximity to the bullseye and steadiness of the axe? Like. It doesn't count if you nick the bullseye but the axe drops."

Even as she waits for the others to agree to her proposal--or suggest any alternatives--the wait staff brings in four pints: two rich, dark brown; one a pale golden yellow; and one a reddish amber. They come with an assurance that a tab has been started under their reservation. This round's on Sparrow, apparently.

Joey fishes out a quarter from his pocket because he's one of the few guys that still carries cash in this country. He holds it up and says "First match pairs up." He flips the quarter, catches it in fist and flips it over the back of his other hand. "Tails it is." He passes the quarter to Sparrow, while his other hand snakes around Nicole's hip and steals another smooch to her cheek as he grabs his beer. "Yeah if yo do't stick the landing the Russian judge gets uppity as shit. Remember to point your toes or something for extra bonus points." There's a faint smile as if Olympic rules apply to everything.

Nicole leans in against Joey after he flips the coin and hands it to Sparrow. With his hand at her hip, she smiles as he kisses her cheek. What can she say, his charm, when he turns it on, is irresistible in her book and even after all this time, simple things like a kiss as he reaches for his beer make the giddy come out in her.

"What if.... what if you stick the landing, but it lands in the Russian judge?" Shoulders lift in a small shrug. "Do you get extra points for that?" Sure, she might be trying to figure out how she might have chances at extra points, but she is also watching to see what Sparrow flips on the coin.

Rhys grins at Sparrow, brows lifting to throw the challenge right back. "I think you're gonna be one who's still gonna kiss me. But of course I'd live up to it. If i had to. Which I won't." The grin widens throughout, undercutting the airily arrogant tone somewhat, and he quirks a brow at Joey and the coin. "Harsh, man. And here I thought we made a good team." A click of the tongue, a shake of the head, and he accepts the drink that arrives, looking to Sparrow with a nod as he takes a sip. "I'm good with that framework. In the unlikely event of an exact tie, we do a throw-off between the worse member of the other team and the better member of mine." A pause. "Kidding. If that somehow happens, each team picks a representative and-- kinda hesitate to say 'sudden death' with axes involved, so let's go with they throw singles until one wins a round."

Another sip, and he laughs at Nicole's question, gesturing to her with his glass as he replies, "Not from the Russian judge you don't. Maybe the others, but I'm pretty sure it'd come out a wash. Unlike the blood from everyone's clothes. And I like this shirt."

"I mean." Sparrow's not about to deny that there will be kissing. It's all a matter of when and why, but she doesn't question that any further, letting it go with an amused, "Mhm." When the coin is tossed her way, she pockets it rather than flipping it, shamelessly engaging in a little petty theft. Looking to Nicole, she observes, "Discord among their ranks already. We'll use this to our advantage." She runs her fingers down the front of his shirt thoughtfully, like she might be imagining it in another color or another location, before pulling away to snag her beer and declare, "I'm with the pretty bitch putting a hit out on the Russian judge. I like a girl who can get the job done." With a brow-waggle toward her teammate, running with the Girls vs Boys proposal, she takes a taste of her beer, sets the glass down and then steps up to start them off.

Rather unimpressively. Her first throw sinks low on the board, but, hey, it actually sticks and is within the outer ring. It's points! For such a bold declaration of pairings, she's certainly not made herself the most desirable of teammates. She tries to declare that a test throw, offering to let everyone get a test round in, but she isn't fooling anyone. In the end, there's a mutter of apology to Nicole. And, on her second round, she definitely makes up for it. The axe lands just to the right of the bullseye, earning a jump and a taunt of, "This round's ours," to Rhys. Even if the odds are not in her favor. It might be more impressive if she could follow it up with a similar throw, but the third lands a little farther away again. Solid enough that she's proud of it, but she's pretty certain she knows how the match will be tallied even before the guys make their final throws. And none of it keeps her from returning to Rhys' side with fair frequency, stealing kisses between sips of beer, cheers for her teammate and good-natured trash-talking of her opponents.

Joey watches Sparrow just take the quarter. A grin spreads on his face, head falling back there is a quiet laugh. "eeeeeh I deserve that. Also? Agreed." There is a look askance to Nicole and back to Rhys, Right. the wives vs. the boyfriends. I get how it is. Rhys, we got this?" It's honestly more of a question than anything else. There i no finesse to that axe when it leaves his hand and Joey scowls at it as if it needs to pay up. It sticks because Joey can still do blunt force trauma in any conditions really.

He looks to Sparrow asking curious, "What's the point in letting it go again? I still on't like letting go of the damn weapon. I mean trees don't run that fast. Just like run em down, leap, hack-hack." he considers it more while the ladies take their throws and impressively he will be first to admit for any human desiring to lethally disarm themselves. "If you can rationalize to me under what circumstance this became a skill... maybe that'll help."

Dark eyes go wide. "No... no sudden death." Nicole shakes her head a bit. "Unless there is indeed a Russian judge and...." she glances towards Rhys' shirt. "And... that is a nice shirt." She smiles mischievously to Sparrow. "So, wifey? You and I against the boys?" Nodding, she seems to approve. In fact, she says, "I approve."

Nicole smells a challenge. Looking up to Joey she says, "Trees don't run that fast, no... but what if they got your feet all tangled up in roots so you can't chase them and they are out of arms reach... and you don't have a gun?" She tilts her head. "See the skill in throwing the ax now?"

She watches Sparrow throw, cheering her on before stepping up to take her own turn. She.... does not do as well as Sparrow. Wrinkling her nose after the three okay but not impressive throws she says, "I am so sorry.... Hopefully you can carry us to victory on your excellent tosses."

The theft of the quarter makes Rhys grin as well, despite the observation of discord, and the trail of Sparrow's fingers down his shirt does absolutely nothing at all to lessen it. "We all like a girl who can get the job done," he replies, brows lifting to turn it into a challenge. Can she? Any worries as to whether he might be able to are soundly quashed behind or possibly beneath the confidence with which he assures Joey, "We got this, boyfriendo."

He makes a show of looking Very Dubious at Sparrow's sudden promotion of test throws, and points out they already did a test round, which by narrative rights ought to come back to bite him when it comes time for his turn. But as it turns out, it does not. Taking a moment to judge the heft of the axe and eye the target again, he adds to Nicole's justification, "Or say you're out chopping down trees, got an axe a foot long, maybe two, and suddenly, here comes this guy running at you with a four foot broadsword. You could wait and hope he doesn't kill you with the first two feet, or you could take reach out of the equation--" He throws, focus on the target and a good deal of his weight behind the missle.

Looking forward to discovering a hitherto unknown talent, he'd said, Or beginner's luck. Perhaps the birthday wishes are strong with this one, today. The thing hurtles through the air and thunks with some vehemence into the board, the blade sunk right across the border between the bullseye and the ring around it. "--and get yourself a nice second-hand broadsword for next time." It's only then that the grin escapes, chin lifting in what is for now quiet triumph, which may well be worse than outright gloating.

The second axe of the round settles nearly as well, and in case anyone was hoping for a one-round fluke, the pair in the second round hit home almost identically to the first. That one comes with another grin and a bit of a 'ta-da!' spread of the hands as he turns around. "Your round, huh?" he taunts Sparrow back, making a perfect opportunity to assess the truth of which actually is worse. "So by that you meant you're buying, right?" He has gotten through a fair portion of his beer by then, though not to refill levels yet.

Stolen kisses, teammate appreciation, and a certain amount of trash-talking are high on his priority list as well, and as he steps up for the final throws of the final round, he makes extra ceremony and drama of it, drawing out the preparation. Thwack, the first one lands, doing its best imitation of all his others so far, and a few moments later it's followed by the very last, which finds itself juddering there as an off-center but inarguable bullseye. "Yesss!" The extended arm draws back down in a fistpump, and he spins in place to face the others, throwing both arms upward in victory much as he did on that first test throw. "I am axeceptional!" he declares, one hand dropping and the other aiming Joey-ward for a high-five. He should probably be glad no one's still wielding blades.

"Axes aren't just for trees," Sparrow informs Joey all too sweetly. With wide eyes, she bids him, "Imagine you're a viking." The Andersson brood next door might be to blame for this bit of mostly imagined insight. "You're raiding a village and some peasant thinks they might throw a spear or pitchfork--" She points to Rhys. "Or a four foot broadsword! You loose your axe and THUNK! Right between the eyes!" She lofts her pint at that. "Then you go over, plant your foot on his chest and pry the weapon out to use it on the next fool who thinks he's got range on you." This might be what the purple-haired punk is imagining on her second throw, even if she more likely lopped off an imagined ear than cut through a skull, but it might be some competetive spirit after Rhys manages so damned well with his own first throw. She even crosses enemy lines to steal a kiss--and maybe a quick, appreciative grab of his ass--as she concedes, "Clearly a fighting style favored by spyrates, too." Yeah. She's impressed.

She keeps close to her teammate, free arm frequently slung about Nicole's waist while they watch their opponents. And, of course, taunt them. Not entirely effectively. When Rhys turns her words back on her, she can't help but eyeroll... even if her broad smile does belie that attempt at derision. "Yeah, I'm buying," sounds like a concession, even if that had been the intention all along. Leaning in against Nicole, she mutters, "I think he's done this before," when the accountant proves so damned good at all of this. Really, by the end of the second round, they don't really need to get into a third, but, well, fun is fun. Maybe they'll rally!

They don't. The ladies squarely lose the skirmish, and it's the blonde at Sparrow's side who gets the first kiss, a conciliatory press of lips to cheek when their defeat is decided for certain. She croons, "I'd still pick you every time, beautiful," before slinking away to steal Rhys from his teammate and wrap him up in her arms and give him a good and proper congratulatory kiss. It might even begin to border on inappropriate for public consumption as it draws on, but that's more about duration than depth. When she draws back, there's a quiet murmur of, "You're amazing," before she looks up and over at Joey to blow a kiss his direction, so very shallow by comparison, but still sincerely meant, a long-distance congratulations for the other winner.

"How's about we go open presents now?" she proposes with a waggle of her brows. And then corrects to, "I mean. Get dinner. Eat. We should eat." Focusing on Joey, she holds out her hands for the keys to the borrowed car. "I'mma just go grab my bag. You guys get a table, and I'll be right back."

Joey blinks at Sparrow, "Irish Viking?" While not convinced he is listening. The shift of posture reads clearly: Convince me. Looking to Ncile he tilts his head, "Hack the roots? Okay okay viking. Go." There's talk of broadswords and people trying to throw spears and he watches with skepticism. "Alright... maybe if it's running up on me? Maybe." And then there's steel flying. He lines up his and puts way too much emphasis on it and the trajectory is shit. The next? Well it falls off to one side. He looks to his teammate going all With hell's hatchet I stab at thee on the target and frowns "Come at me bro!" Post taunt the axe hits... again...it sticks... but side on the other side.

Rhys does get a long look and a flat stare. "I don't high five." It's cold and crisp and a moment later he hoists a hand. "I'm fucking with you. Good job. But I think we really learned don't anger you three from a distance cause uhhhh I'm a deadman. I still say this is unnatural."

Awestruck. That pretty much sums up how Nicole feels when watching Rhys throw. Her own partner is not shabby at all, but Rhys? Dayum. "Man.... if I ever see you in an alley with an ax, I am hiding behind a dumpster.... No lie." She mostly stays by Sparrow's side during the rounds, except of course when her favorite bird flies off to make smoochy smoochy with Rhys. She grins at one point and slides up to Joey, whispering, "and people say we are cute." It is but a beat of a moment before she says, "we are." She proves this by kissing the tip of his nose before going back off to her spot to wait for Sparrow. Nodding to the lavender haired beauty she murmurs, "mmhmm. I bet we'll find his photo here somewhere with some trophy he wins every year." Her cheek is offered to Sparrow when she leans in to give her that smooch. "You better, wifey!" She chuckles then says, "oh! Presents!!" bouncing a little on her feet. "I mean... right. Food and eating..."

It's all fun and games until he makes that horrible pun. Nicole's face scrunches up as if it was pure agony and she winces, shaking her head... but she also can't help but laugh.

After the bro-fives occur, she slips in to wrap her arms around Joey from behind, leaning to his side to look up at him and kiss his arm. "Looks like I owe you a pampering. Am I going to get you in a salon chair? Mani Pedi? Run you a bubble bath?" She is grinning from ear to ear.

Spyrates are clearly a serious peril when they've got themselves an axe! Rhys is of course entirely in accordance with Sparrow's reasoning for the need to throw one's axe, and even more so with her decisions that he needs kissing (and ass-grabbing) at various times. There's retaliation, of course, but that's just inevitable. Eye for an eye, squeeze for a squeeze.

Joey's claim of not high-fiving does not get the hand dropped; instead there's an arched brow and diagonal tilt of the head that really doesn't need the dry "Really, man?" that goes with it to be said aloud for it to be heard loud and clear. The much smaller, wryer twist of lips that accompanied it breaks back into the grin when the appropriate hand comes up, and the contact creates a good solid smack. "That's more like it. Go us and our mighty unnatural blade-hurling!"

The congratulatory kiss gets returned in full, so really, it's almost like the girls won too, right? Though probably not when it comes time to cash in the winnings. "You too," he murmurs back, though of course he has to add, "...just not quite as axetraordinary as me." Yeah, he did it twice. And he steals another, quicker little kiss as well, before nodding agreement to Nicole. "Presents," he echoes, "I mean, food and eating. And presents." Reclaiming his beer, he lifts it to the others in a toast, and drains what little in it yet remained.

Sparrow wants to roll her eyes at the recycled pun, but she doesn't manage, a laugh escaping before she has any opportunity to downplay Rhys' awesomeness in an attempt to keep the leo's ego in check. She croons an affectionate, "Weirdo," on the wake of that second barely stolen kiss then nods to the pair of potential gift-recipients. "Presents." Sure, sure, and food, too. She, likewise, finishes up her beer before snagging the car keys from Joey and dashing off by herself with a promise of, "Be right back," to the hostess so that no one tries to get her companions to pay the outstanding tab on the assumption that Ms. Jones is disappearing for the evening.

The same server who'd delivered their drinks is glad to show the remaining trio to a free table in the brewery, handing over menus for some slightly elevated pub fare: burgers with fancy cheese and pickled veggies, grilled cheese with pork belly instead of bacon, fries drenched in some sort of lobster gravy. It's a nice place. Maybe a bit hipster, but the beer's certainly good.

Sparrow's only gone for a couple of minutes, as long as it takes to cross the parking lot, unlock the car, fuss with her bag and its contents, lock the car back up... and then figure out where her friends ended up. The gift bag is metallic red and... singular. Really. Just one. Which makes more sense when she empties it of its contents before sitting down. The boxes she pulls from the bag are identical. They're the same shape and size, each a cube measuring approximately five inches on each side. They're both wrapped in obnoxiously cheerful rainbow gingham paper with yellow ribbon intersecting beneath a yellow bow. White cards are tucked beneath both bows, each reading TO MY FAVORITE LEO in purple marker. If there's any difference between them, it's going to take some intentional effort to spot. Satisfied, she settles down, murmurs, "Whenever you're ready. No rush," to Nicole and Rhys, then hands the car keys back to Joey with a wide, excited smile.

Joey absently fishes his keys to his loaner car out of his pocket and tosses them to Sparrow. His hands are shamelessly too busy with Nicole. This qualifies as him being sometimes actually fun! It doesn't mean it doesn't occur to him, looking to Rhys, that they weren't followed. Another scan of the bar seems... all clear but he doesn't really stand down until Sparrow is back at the table and no one's got eyes on her who isn't them.

Good good.

NOW he's looking at the box and pointing to the replacement drink for Sparrow. Joey's got round two apparently. "Open the box, baby. I'm curious as hell." Looking to Nicole he says with deadpan, "You too."

"Presents!" Nicole says again, after Rhys emphasizes the presents over the food by saying it (and his pun) twice.

She walks with the others to the table, looking at a menu while eagerly awaiting the return of Sparrow. She gets another drink, letting Joey order whatever for her. Honestly, if it isn't name brand, she just doesn't know. He, however, knows what she likes. She scoots her chair to the corner of the table so she can sit closer to Joey, extending a leg to rest over his, tucking her foot beneath the other. Before she decides on food, Sparrow returns, emptying the bag and putting the boxes before each of them. Nicole chuckles at the matching name tags. "So diplomatic," she says with a smile. "Thank you." No rush is said, but uh, presents! She opens hers carefully though, one of THOSE people, while half eyeing Rhys to see what he got as well. Joey makes his "you too" comment again and she laughs, sneaking him a quick kiss before she opens the box.

When she does finally open it, she smiles, lifting the bottle first. "Ooooh. Perversion. You know me so well." She waggles a brow over to Sparrow as she opens the bottle to take a sniff, offering it then to Joey to smell. "What do you think? Sexy?" When she pulls out the miniature sign/cake topper, she laughs and rises up to lean over the table hoping to give Sparrow a smooch in thanks. "For our future wedding. Thank you, Wifey."

In Rhys's defense, it's not exactly (axeactly?) the same pun! Just... essentially. But everyone knows technically correct is the best kind of correct, right? "Got a whole entourage of hens," he replies agreeably to the accusation of being a weirdo, and he watches briefly after Sparrow before getting soundly hostessed to a table. The menu is full of things that look pretty intriguing, not even counting the beer (the first of which, of course, requires replacement now), and eh, there's worse things than being hipster-adjacent, right? Deliciousness can make up for a lot, too.

If he shares Joey's sudden spark of worry for Sparrow being briefly out of the pack, it's not particularly obvious, but he does meet that glance, and while the glance around over his menu may well be assessing what other people are eating and to what extent he wishes he were, certainly it could be other things he's looking for. Not long for anyone to be concerned, at least, and the grin he breaks into on her return is probably the same it would've been regardless. "'To my favourite Leo,'" he reads as the boxes are drawn out, and looks up from them to their giver, all innocence, "Where's hers?" The attempt can't last in the face of the reiteration of Joey's joke, and he grins again, giving the guy an exaggerated wink. "Well. Hate to make you wait, babe."

Definitely that and no other reason that has him drawing his over and having at it. He's also not a rend-and-ripper, apparently, though the unwrapping isn't so much careful per se as efficient, the ribbon undone and the tape that seals one side flicked free to let him push the box out of the still-fairly-cubic paper. "Tissue paper!" he exclaims on opening it, "Just what I always wanted!" He actually does look a bit pleased with it and its vibrant shade, though not so much that he isn't promptly picking through it for the other contents. The perfume is found first by him, too, and he arches a brow at her. "This isn't your subtle way of staying I stink, right?" He's already opening it up to take a sniff, though, and looks as though he approves. "Mmm. Fills me with the will to pillage," he decides, touching the little dabber-thing to the inside of his wrist experimentally. putting the top back on, he offers the wrist toward Sparrow, to see what she thinks of it.

The other hand's already poking around again, though, and finds the compass, which he blinks at once and then smiles as he tilts it and watches the needle staying right where it should. The smile widens, charmed, when he turns it over and sees the inscription. "Well, thank you, Ms. Jones," he says quietly, then reaches over and tries to draw her close enough to properly kiss. "We'll be the terror of the tides."

Joey is quiet. He doesn't need to say anything to enjoy himself. his weird little tribe is happy, and his girlfriends best bitch and future Vegas wifey organized a damn fine party. He does bounce his leg were Nicole perches resting his chin on her shoulder and eyes that. "Shiiiit that a cake topper? That's awesome. Rhys and I are invited right?" He sniffs and blinks, "I think I'd have to smell the perfume on you but that's pretty fucking nice. Should definitely marry her before she finds a new best bitch. Don't let thi one get away." Looking over at Rhys, after stealing a bitey-smooch to the side of Nicole's neck he says, "Really, happy birthday, man."

"Diplomatic?" Sparrow's dark brows loft toward her purple bangs, a downright devilish glint in her eyes. She's got a grin to go with it that only grows when Rhys reads it right, taking it as the golden apple marked for the fairest that it could have been. She picks no side, instead waggling her eyebrows cheesily in Nicole's direction and watching while the gifts are unwrapped. She dips her head graciously when Rhys expresses his enthusiasm for the tissue paper, feigning pleasure at his feigned pleasure without missing a beat. Nevermind the attentiveness right behind it, the way her gaze flits from one to the other eagerly. She points between Nicole and Joey when he indicates he's gonna need to smell the perfume on her before any judgment is rendered, a firm nod agreeing whole-heartedly with that sentiment. Note the demonstration when she leans in against Rhys' offered wrist, snagging a quick bite just below where the scent was applied. Surely, that counts as approval! She even tells him, "You definitely smell better now," with impish emphasis on the last word.

When Nicole rounds to give her a hug, Sparrow leans right in to reciprocate, placing a big old smooch on her bestie's cheek. "No promises," she tells Joey, "but if we ever both run off to Vegas without warning..." She doesn't seem particularly inclined to do so tonight, though, all too happy to keep close to Rhys, murmuring a soft, "Anytime, captain," on the wake of that kiss. "Just gotta find ourselves a seamstress, and we're good to go." Wasn't there something else on their list? She can't remember. Maybe it'll come up over dinner, the conversation meandering over a variety of topics, not the least of which is all the ways in which the victors of the axe-throwing competition ought to be pampered by the losers, some of which undoubtedly get outlandish, not all of which are turned down outright. It's a good night, really, just far enough away from all the problems of Gray Harbor that nothing goes wrong.

For just one night, nothing goes wrong. Happy birthday.