2020-12-28 - Star Wars Shenanigans

Even selling your firstborn son could not turn airline food good. No amount of money thrown at an airline company will ever fix the problem that at a certain altitude, your tastebuds simply don't work right. Airline food tastes like cardboard, however fancy, because your tastebuds are on strike.

Maybe it's the promise of high calorie food that does not taste like cardboard that prompts Ravn Abildgaard to accept an invitation to a Star Watch watch party at Seth Monaghan's very shortly after driving back from the airport. One shower and a change of clothes later he walks over, because if there's one thing the Dane feels like, it's having someone make him food and coffee -- someone who isn't hotel staff. Nothing wrong with hotels -- actually, there's everything wrong with hotels and Ravn never liked staying in them. So maybe he's a little tired because his body was just getting used to the idea of Central European Time again and now he's back in Pacific Standard, but whaaat the hey -- worst case scenario, somebody will wake him up when the Death Star explodes.

Odds are that on Seth's fancy home theatre rig, the sound of the Death Star exploding will take care of that all by itself.

He rings the door bell, bag under one arm, and looking slightly dishevelled because hell, it's one long flight and the only place that makes for even worse sleeping than a hotel is a bloody airplane.

Alexander is early, of course. He's also carrying something: a large container of caramel popcorn. He wasn't going to try and pop his own, but felt like it was necessary to have popcorn in order to watch movies. To be honest, he doesn't watch a lot of movies. And right now, his expression is a little distracted, and he scans the neighborhood as he walks to Seth's house, his brow furrowed and posture alert, not quite at ease. Watchful.

He falls in behind Ravn, saying, "You came back," with clear pleasure, but also a hint of rueful critique, like that wasn't wise, but I'm glad you did it. "Did Hyacinth, or did she elope with the house?"

The ringing of the doorbell prompts a yell from inside, "Come on in! The door is open!"

As the door is opened, the smell of sizzling meat with garlic and spice and other such savory things waft out the open door. "I'll be with you guys in a minute," Seth calls from the kitchen as he walks into view carrying a tray of meat, "I had an almost catastrophe with the steaks, but I think I managed to save them. They //might/ be a little charred on one side but just think of it as some extra flavor. They should still be good." I still have the wings to finish up, how hot do you like them?"

A card table has been set up by the wall of the living room, adorned with a variety of foodstuffs. There are chips, cheeses, and cold cuts along with a vegetable platter with an assortment of dips. For a selection of hot items, there is a crock-pot of meatballs simmering in a cream sauce, fixings for burgers and hot dogs which have now been joined by the aforementioned steaks.

The table has been decorated with various Star Wars items. Pictures of Vader, Luke, Leia, Han and Chewie are placed around, and little Tie Fighters and X-Wings have been made out of some of the available food items to add to the atmosphere.

Seth has been busy.

"I think they'll probably have a tempestuous long distance relationship in which they send each other pictures of balustrades and buttresses," Ravn replies with a small, lopsided grin. "That woman certainly likes herself some architecture. Moreover, she knows what she's talking about. I thought I had a fair handle on these things but I certainly learned a thing or two."

Stepping inside, he shrugs out of his wind breaker and scarf -- slate grey, not that other, yellow chiffon one -- and then catches sight of Seth's rather generous preparations. "My god. I'm in paradise. I've gone through Airline purgatory and now I enter Heaven." Then, with a small grin he adds, "I'm Danish, I look at a jalapeño and die. Be gentle with my poor Scandinavian palate. On second thought, my poor Scandinavian palate has been subjected to take-out and airline food for a week. Kill it with fire."

He carefully puts down his bag on a nearby suitable surface. "Do you guys want to relieve me of a bit of Danish loot right away, or later?"

"I feel like that should be an euphemism, but I'm suspecting it's not," Alexander is saying as he and Ravn enter the house at Seth's call. He looks around, his gaze keen - not quite as staring as before, but checking the room for exits and surprises with the instinctive care of someone accustomed to walking into nasty situations. After the once-over, he comes to rest on Seth and his tray of meat, and blinks. "Damn, man. How many people are coming?" He grins. "And I like hot things, so...surprise me." He lifts his package. "I brought caramel popcorn. I don't know if it fits, but popcorn is for movies." He finds a spare piece of surface area to squeeze the container onto. Then peers at the Star Wars items. "You're a fan," he says, with amusement.

"One don't kill me with fire, but kill me with fire and one surprise me. Got it." Seth says as he starts to make his way back into the kitchen. "I'll make two batches mild and 'surprise'. As for who is coming, as far as I know just us. Maybe Vic, but feel free to make some calls and invite others over if you think they would like to come. I obviously have enough food to feed the whole town here. So Ravn, how was your flight? Did you get any sleep? Did Ms. Addington marry your house, or was it just a torrid affair that ended badly?"

Looking over at Alexander, Seth grins, "I'm more the salty buttery type of popcorn eater personally, but I will still probably have some. Do you need a smaller bowl to portion yourself some of that out in, or is it just going to be communal?"

Seth gets back to work in the kitchen, tossing some wings into a bowl of buttermilk before starting to mix up a sauce for them in another container. "So, how did we want to start this? Do you want to go in order with Episode 1, then go 2, 3, Rogue One, Solo, then 4 through 9? Or start with order of release?"

Ravn throws his hands up and laughs softly. "I honestly don't care about the order. I wasn't joking when I said that I slept through the prequels and I haven't watched the new trilogy. I think I saw Rogue One if it's the one where -- "

He glances at Alexander who presumably hasn't seen it. Spoilers, man.

" -- where one of the lead characters is Mads Mikkelsen. That one made a bit of headlines back home, Danish actor and all." He flops down on the nearest bit of sofa, clearly tired in the way you get when you spend entirely too many hours sitting in uncomfortable positions on planes. "Flight wasn't bad, to be honest, but I'm not going to lie and say that a transatlantic flight is fun. After an hour or three, it's mostly just very, very boring, and there's always some bloke who gets airsick or drunk nearby. I am pretty certain that Hyacinth is going to carry on a romantic long distance relationship with the art school, though. Who knows? Maybe onion turrets will be the next big thing here."

He reaches for his back and takes out what's obviously a wrapped book and a wrapped bottle, offering the former to Alexander and the second to Seth. "Save this for a private time with someone you care about," he warns the latter. "It's bloody good."

"Salty buttery popcorn gets stale quickly, especially if walking. And I was afraid I might burn down my house," Alexander mutters, a little sheepishly. "I'm learning to cook, but anything that has a tendency to burn if left alone too long..." he clears his throat, "I'm easily distracted." He smiles. "Uh, it can be communal, if people want. I don't fear that you have any diseases." He prowls around, only to be brought up short by a book offered to him. He blinks, takes it. There's no hesitation in looking at it - Alexander is /very bad/ at putting off solving a mystery. "Thank you, Ravn. And you, Seth, for inviting, and cooking all of this." In response to the question about order, he just looks a little blank. "I...what would you recommend? I've heard the prequels aren't particularly good."

Nodding to Alexander, "They aren't that good. The acting is wooden and the story is a bit hokey, but it at least will give you the story in order instead of bouncing around the timeline. I think someone like you might prefer that?" Seth says as he takes the bottle from Ravn.

With an arched brow, the enforcer sets down the bowls he was carrying for the popcorn and slowly starts to unwrap the bottle to see what it is. "Thanks, Ravn. I think I know just the person to share this with," he says with a grin.

Denmark is not the first country someone would think of when you say 'single malt whiskey' but that's what it is; a black bottle with a label in black and purple that proudly proclaims the brand to be Stauning and the variety to be Heather. "Danish whiskey is surprisingly good," Ravn murmurs. "Kind of smoky, a bit sweet. I thought it might be something you'd appreciate, Mr Whiskey, Neat."

The book is titled The Copenhagen Job and appears to be a true crime story about a robbery in Copenhagen in 2008 during which thieves made off with 70 million kroner from a money transporting company. No shots were fired but the perpetrators were in fact never caught. "I realise there's no murder involved," Ravn apologises to Alexander. "I thought it might be interesting because of that -- these people went to a hell of a lot of effort to avoid murder charges, in spite of literally setting the street pretty much on fire with burning garbage trucks and leading the police on a high speed chase through the capital. It was exceedingly professionally carried out."

"Linearity is a virtue, but I'm comfortable with deduction, as well. In my main affairs, you're rarely lucky enough to have a straight path to a conclusion." A thoughtful pause. "Often you don't have a conclusion at all, which is more frustrating." He looks down at the book, and blinks. "Oh my." He reads the cover, then pages through a bit, and a smile brightens his face. "This is wonderful. Thank you, Ravn. I like interesting crimes, and this looks like one. Thanks." He grins.

Studying the bottle of whiskey, Seth smiles. "Sounds wonderful. I will certainly savor this, thanks, man. " The redhead takes the bottle over to the fully stocked bar over on one wall and places it within the glass-doored cabinetry that is attached to the unit. "Oh, by the way, feel free to help yourselves to the bar. Me casa, Su casa."

Seth wanders over towards the overly intricate entertainment system and accompanying shelving filled with blu-ray disks, finding the films in question, and pulling them from the rack. "Did either of you want to invite anyone else over before we start this thing? They can join in whenever...it is going to last all day, unless we break it up into a few days...which is more likely to happen. I don't think I can sit here for over 24 hours watching 11 films."

"I can almost guarantee you that I'll be soundly asleep before 24 hours are up." Ravn laughs softly. "I want to say, invite the whole bloody town, I love everybody, but at this rate? If I pass out at the sight of Ewan McGregor again, please don't take it personally. I should probably not drink anything until I've eaten something either, unless you really do want me to curl up on on the sofa and refuse to move for the next twelve hours."

He glances over to Alexander. "But there was something I wanted to ask you. That language thing that some of you do -- where you can say my name and get the sounds right. This is normal for people here? I just watched Hyacinth grill the school groundskeeper on the specifics of wood types used in 17th century paneling. I couldn't do that in Danish if I tried. She can."

Alexander hums at the thought. "I could invite Miss Machinae. She seems like the sort to enjoy watching Star Wars. Although she might make us play a game at some point." He grins, clearly not minding the idea. "I'll send her a text. She might be busy at the shop." Which he does, after tucking the new book under his arm. It's not getting out of his sight, oh no. He looks up at the question. "Um. It's not normal. There's very few people who have enough empathy to do it. I've only been able to do it for a year or so. I got extremely wasted, and woke up with stronger abilities. But," he pauses, "it's like...skimming the language centers of the people around you for fluency. I wouldn't be able to speak or understand Danish if you weren't within about a mile, if I saw it on TV or over the internet. Speaking is harder than understanding, at least for me. I imagine it'd get easier the more people around you spoke that language, but I don't leave Gray Harbor very often to test it."

(TXT to Abitha) Ravn : Pst. Star Wars. At Seth's. Now.

(TXT to Ravn) Abitha : Uhh, ok? Like it has become Star Wars? Are you texting from a Dream?

(TXT to Abitha) Ravn : With the amount of sleep I had on the plane I might well be, but no. 26 Elm -- come on over. Alexander's here too.

(TXT to Ravn) Abitha : That is vague as hell. Are we watching one of the movies? And which one? That heavily influences whether I'm busy or not.

(TXT to Abitha) Ravn : I think the idea is to go chronologically but you can probably twist elbows to get the original trilogy. 😉

(TXT to Abitha) Alexander : Come watch movies with us.

(TXT to Ravn Alexander) Abitha : OMGawd fine. Omw. Lemme get an uber.

"Invite who you want. There is plenty of food, and if we have to take a break for gaming at some point I can handle that as well." Seth says with a chuckle. "Just tell people don't bother to bring anything, I've got it all covered."

Seth continues with the preparation of the wings, starting to slowly fry them in a pan after dredging them in a spice and flour mixture.

(TXT to Ravn Alexander) Abitha : Do I need to bring anything?

(TXT to Abitha) Alexander : No. Seth has enough food to feed the entire town. Possibly with food left over. If you like meat.

Ravn nods at Alexander. "That makes sense. Hyacinth would pick the language up easily when she's literally surrounded by native speakers." He does not move to suggest inviting anyone else; not so much because there aren't people he likes in Gray Harbor -- there are in fact plenty of those -- but because crowds inevitably end with situations such as him baking cupcakes in the kitchen with a ghost, to escape said crowds.

He puts the cell down and grins at the chef enforcer. "I think Mac's coming over. There may be lots of jibes and puns. She's a gamer through and through, child of the internet."

(TXT to Ravn Alexander) Abitha : You don’t know what a Machinae Christmas is like...

"We might get to see Seth and Machinae go head to head, after all," Alexander says, with a wink at Ravn. He adds his own two cents to the text conversation, then finally moves to take a seat on the couch. "The language thing is the best thing about my abilities. It doesn't hurt anyone. It doesn't cause my brain to explode. It doesn't seem to drag me into dreams. I like that part a lot."

Mention of Abitha makes him smile. "Good. She'll be fun."

"Cool, cool. I can handle puns and jibes, I've been known to sling a few myself here and there," says Seth with a chuckle. "Bring it on, though with her showing up I have a feeling we are going to skip ahead to the original trilogy. She seems like a purist to me."

Done with the frying up of the wings, Seth goes about tossing the wings in the sauces, one batch each of 'tame' and 'OMG!!!111!!111!', but he doesn't label either as he just sets the bowls out onto the table of food. "Here is your surprise...I'm not labeling them. Eat at your own risk, or use your powers of deduction to figure it out."

"That's hardly fair, I'm not a detective. I suppose I'll just let Clayton pick first, and then, if he doesn't die, I'm eating from the same bowl." Ravn grins slightly. "Oh man. I still need to get back at her for that horse picture. I recruited Vydal to help me out with a suitable prank but in the meantime? If she ends up eating liquid fire and drinking half of the pond, I will be snapping pictures and snickering."

Luckily, Alexander is a detective. And, in truth, it doesn't take much. He looks at each bowl, sniffs the steam coming off of each, then gently touches each wing, licks the sauce off, and then makes a satisfied nod.

Then he fills his plate with the exact same number of wings from each bowl, and tells Ravn, with a smile, "Good luck." Seth gets a wink as he wanders back to his seat to settle in. "I admit that I don't see 'Vydal' and 'pranks' in the same sentence very easily. But then again, he's dating the Baxter kid, so he must have a more playful side."

And Abitha does show up eventually, knocking on the door. She’s bundled up against the weather, probably striking an odd figure outside the door with her hooded, cloak-like outerwear. Luckily for some, though, the hair filtering from the front was visibly green, not purple. Regardless of what she was told, there is a boxed six-pack of bottle dangling from her fingers. Her courier bag is also visible, though it was olive green, with a spray-painted Star Wars bounty hunter symbol on it, probably Disney’s The Mandolorian apparel. Underneath she’s in comfy leggings and a big sweater with some calf-high boots.

"A solid solution, Ravn, unless you consider that Alexander asked for the hot ones. Maybe that is the one he will choose for himself. You know, the whole Iocane powder scenario." Seth says with a grin. "Guess you will just have to take your chances. But if you don't want to let Mac know that there are two different versions, that is up to you."

Then Alexander does his selection, and Seth just grins as there is a knock on the door. "Come on it, the door is unlocked," calls Seth down the hall as he starts to make a plate for himself selecting some of the steak and veggies for his first plate, casting a glance down the hall to the front door to see who makes their way inside.

"I am so screwed," Ravn murmurs and stares at both plates with a woe-begone expression (something which he is actually quite good at, confidence artist that he used to be). "Maybe I should plead the fifth and settle for just the steak?"

He mans up a little and picks a wing from each plate. Because if this is going to be the death of him, then at least he'll try to go out with dignity. But it's probably no coincidence that he also makes sure that that bottle of soda there is very much within reach. Scandinavian cuisine is not known for its excessive use of spices (it is in fact known in some of the parts of the world as the most bland, mealy diet of porridge and cardboard in existence). At least there's steak and veggies too -- he may survive this ordeal after all. Provided that he picks the right wing.

Trust the man to beam at Mac though. "Just in time for the wings! Help yourself."

Alexander? Alexander is a sucker for a woebegone expression, and immediately looks contrite. "Sorry. Um, it's that one." He points at the wing that's got the fiery sauce, then takes a similar one from his plate, and chows down merrily. He pauses to wipe his mouth and fingertips afterwards, though - his eyes water a bit, and he's careful to get all the sauce off so he doesn't accidentally set his eyes on fire or something. "It's not that hard to figure out. You can smell the spice if you're careful." A smile at Seth. "It's very good."

Then Abitha is entering, and he goes watchful for a moment until he recognizes the woman, then he grins and waves. "Hey. How are you?" He's dressed...completely normally, for Alexander. But he does add, "We got to see Luke's severed hand at the Museum of Pop Culture the other day. So I know he loses a hand at some point."

Abitha enters, but only after its clear these savages were not going to answer the door. There’s a huff of annoyance as she realizes literally two days being home with her parents had dredged up old politenesses she had hated fervently. She sheds her cloak and finds a place to gently lay it down, then proceeds further into the house, setting down the sours and her courier, then stopping to inspect the wings. “Hey. I’m doing ok.”

She recoils and sways backward from the one bowl of wings after briefly smelling, hand going to dab at her eye, careful not to smear her liner, “What in the actual fuck?” She remarks half-aside, blinking the heat out of her vision. She selects from the other bowl, then peers around for ranch or blue cheese. She stops to slowing ratchet her eyes over to Alexander, “Wait... have you never seen Star Wars?”

Joey shows up at the door with a paper grocery bag that smells like... well ti' good. You know what is in there. Ribs. Joey's been working today and that means jeans, his Boba Fett hoodie under his leather jacket. Yes. He prepped for this. He stops and looks to Mac, "You didn't listen either. Good." Announcing himself he calls out, "I know you got wings but I was over there so I grabbed a slab of ribs to go with." He lets himself in and notably he left his piece in the car. He catches the tail end of the comment about Luke's hand and murmurs, "That wasn't my fault. Suuuup, peeps."

"No, no he hasn't which is the entire reason for this shindig," Seth says as he wanders into the kitchen to get bowls of ranch and blue cheese for wing-dipping. The spread on the table is...large. Easily more food than can fill the bellies of those that are already here. Maybe Seth expects more people to show up, or just plans on eating a bunch of leftovers for the rest of the week. Wings, burgers, hot dogs, wings, and now thanks to Joey, ribs are the choices for hot meats. Cold cuts and veggies are also available. There are little tie fighters and x-wings made out of some of the foodstuff to add to the decor.

"Alexander made the mistake of mentioning he hadn't seen it, so I figured I had to remedy the situation. I was going to go chronologically just for continuity's sake, but I am starting to rethink, and maybe we will just go in order of theatrical release. That way if Alexander doesn't know about the thing, he finds out without it being given away." Seth thinks about that for a moment, then nods to himself. "Yeah...we are going to go that route. Hey Joey, welcome! Glad you could make it. Feel free to help yourselves to the bar, everyone. I'll start the movie."

That being said, Seth makes his way over to the entertainment center, and picks the appropriate disk out of its case and slips it into the player. Soon, the opening trumpets of the main Star Wars fanfare sounds though the hidden surround sound speakers as the infamous Star Wars yellow logo takes up the screen on the wall.

Ravn tactically places himself in a corner of the couch; not the best seat for viewing the movie but very likely the one where he'll be the least in the way when he inevitably passes out after a translatlantic flight and the drive here from the airport, a shower and a change of clothes and let's be honest here, the only thing that's keeping him conscious is a combination of sheer will and the urge to be surrounded by people he cares about, as opposed to flight personnel or hotel staff.

He very carefully avoids That Wing on his plate. Even the mild one gives him a bit of pause. It's a good thing that soda is nearby.

"My parents didn't let me do fiction when I was a kid, and I've never gotten into the habit of it," Alexander explains, with a shrug. "I haven't seen much. I mean, I'm on the internet, so I know some parts of the story. It's almost impossible not to. But I've never seen, no." He grins when Joey shows up. "Hey! Nice to see you. And there are ribs. Christ," he says, looking at the spread, "we're going to get meat sweats from all of this. You know that, right?" He doesn't seem to mind the idea.

He takes up a position on the floor as the new people filter in, leaving Abitha and Joey plenty of room on the couch. He seems comfortable, cross-legged on the carpet, plate balanced on his thighs. "Happy new year to everyone. Hope it's been okay so far?" His attention is caught by the trumpet blare of the opening credits, and he turns his attention to the screen, reading the opening scrawl like he's going to be tested on the material later.

Picking up a decent spread of the food, probably a more than decent amount for a woman her size, Abitha tosses a look Joey’s way. They hadn’t talked yet, and just seeing him at a casual thing at Seth Monaghan’s was a little off-putting. But Alexander And Ravn were here, so she probably wasn’t going to get offed.

“That’s a severe tragedy. At least as far as the originals go. The rest, I could take or leave.” ’Meat sweats‘ gets a disgusted grimace, but she doesn’t deign to comment. She moves to tuck herself into a corner of the couch, slipping out of her boots so she can tuck her legs beneath herself and get comfortable. There’s a brief moment where she looks around at the other four and has a realization, then slumps down, looking resigned to something.

Joey replies to Alexander, "Bruh, you know I ain't showin up without my rib-" the words are cut off and something very, decidedly weird happens. Notorious crime underboss, Joey Kelly, before the whole living room is 11 for a moment all over again. Those green eyes get huge framed in white on all sides as he stares. Carefully he reaches over to pick up a large blueberry on a toothpick with 2 slices of banana on either side . He holds it up "Dude you got teeny tiny tie fighters??!" Magic, man. Fuck the veil. Does he remember who the hell he is or who is in the room? Meh. He's making little figure 8's in the air making the fruit make pewpew noises. Woosh. Nom... That lands right in the hanger, and he thankfully remembers not to eat the damn toothpick though muses, "Now it's a lightsaber." A little squadron of those are moved to the corner of his plate. Plate positively loaded (you thought you have enough food here) he plants his ass on the couch. He does comment to Abitha, "Rogue One was arguably in contention to be the best film they got. Also without a number. I don't think that's a coincidence. Sup, Ravn."

"I'm sorry to hear that, Clayton. To paraphrase a contemporary fiction writer -- books don't tell us that dragons exist but that dragons can be beaten." Ravn quietly quirks an eyebrow at Mac at the other end of the couch. Sausage fest?, he mouths silently at her, making a guess at what the issue might be -- correct or incorrect as may be.

"Hello, coach." The larger man's antics does cause the Dane to smile slightly; he doesn't share those levels of enthusiasm but watching someone else who does makes him wonder slightly if it's possible that he somehow missed out on something, somewhere, in not being a Star Wars fan boy.

Alexander's eyes flick over to Joey as the man regresses twenty years and proceeds to play with his food. There's the faintest of smiles as he watches him load a plate, although he doesn't actually say anything about it. He also notes Abitha's discomfort, and even Ravn's mouthed question. He lacks anything like tact, though, so he outright asks, "What's wrong?" Then glances back to the screen, his head tilting to one side like a curious dog. "Rogue One is the one with Mads Mikkelsen?"

“Well, kinda. Also was going to say I’m the youngest one here...” Abitha attempts at an explanation, but then her eyes slowly swing in Joey’s direction, a wry look in them as she delivers the deadpan humor, “At least until Kelly saw the food as toys.”

Still, even with the resigned look, she was at least settling in comfortably. This was her lot in life apparently, arguing the finer points of nerd media with men in their thirties.

“Is it weird I forgot Rogue One existed until I saw it on Netflix? Like I’m not saying it was bad as Two or Three, but like... I dunno, low impact? I preferred Rebels, Clone wars, Mandolorian.” She remarks as she finally takes a bite of ribs via tearing some meat off and dropping it in her mouth so she wouldn’t just have barbecue sauce all over her face.

Seth, for his part, is still busy in the kitchen starting the process of cleaning up after all the food prep. He chuckles and nods to Joey, "Yeah, I made them. It wasn't hard. Just figured they would be a fun little addition, ya know?"

He tries to keep the noise int he kitchen down to a minimum so that the dialog from the movie can be heard, leaving the heavy scrubbing and washing for later. Oblivious to any discomfort the green-haired girl might be feeling due to being in the kitchen with running water, Seth calls out during the opening space battle, "Hey, Mac, I've been told that at some point you and I are destined to play a game together. I think odds have been laid down."

Abitha looks over at Seth, then cleans her fingers long enough to reach down and open her courier, pulling out a Switch. An eyebrow is lofted.

"Yeah that guy that kinda looks like he could be Thewlis' dad or somethin? That guy. Architect that's gang pressed to work for some bullshit government military instillation and didn't think the gig was cool so he built it faulty on the sly cause fuck those guys." He takes a giant carnivorous bite out of the chicken wing at least mindful to be 'neat' as one is about it. There's a pause, eyebrow arched without looking up agreeing with Mac, "That is troo." He pauses and considers this (and be fair he only- oh he is in his thirtys now). "You can't like a New Hope without appreciating Rogue one. A bunch of people on a doomed mission dealing with bullshit because they're the only ones in any position to do some shit that's gotta be done so other people can water their fucking plants. It's like a metaphor for this fuckin town. Everyone watching and the characters themselves knew what that outcome was gonna be, but that didn't stop them. Everyone else in the other movies thought hey maybe I'll walk away from this but no t these guys. Rogue One? they were about something different. Same with the Mando protecting the lil green kid. Makes it..." He shrugs, "I dunno. maybe more important or somethin. Ravn, if you have questions about the film know there's only gonna be long answers. Enjoy what you want about the movie." He moves a fruit tie fighter onto Ravn's plate. "The fleet's delicious. Try one."

"Rogue One is the Mads Mikkelsen one." Mac's look causes Ravn to look around too, and then hitch a shoulder lightly. "Star Wars is not a 'boy thing', though. Or if it is, you're clearly more of a man than Clayton or I. I don't even recognise those titles -- Clone Rebels, Monday Lawn, whatever you just said." The part about being younger than everyone else too clearly went over his head. "Food's good and I'm not on a jet or in a meeting with a lawyer, I'm happy."

"Clayton's the one who's not seen the original trilogy before," Ravn murmurs with mild amusement. "I've seen that, but not the rest. My fiancee loved the prequels, though, so I think I am contractually required to hate them and Ewan McGregor's face. Which is probably unfair to Ewan McGregor since from what little of the prequels I stayed awake for, he's the only decent actor in them."

And then he has a fruit TIE fighter. The folklorist looks at it with mild confusion. "If I eat my little space ship, does that make me a bad person?"

"She's gonna paste you," Alexander warns, cheerfully, his eyes still locked on the screen, even as he reaches for another wing and eats it with fastidious pleasure. There's the flash of a grin as Abitha reveals that she brought the Switch along. To Abitha, he says, "I'm the oldest one here, and I've seen none of these movies. So. Shared awkward, even if for different reasons." And it's true; Alexander has left his thirties behind, and looks as if he's mid-forties as least, thanks to the perpetual exhaustion of his features. His eyes jump back and forth from the screen to the others, and but the movie is gradually grabbing most of his attention, and he falls silent to watch.

"Maybe," agrees Seth with a nod and a chuckle at Alexander's comment that Abitha will waste him, "But I have some decent hand-eye coordination, so I might at least give her a run for her money? Who knows? Never know till we play."

Seth makes his way out of the kitchen, wiping his hands on a kitchen towel which he tosses onto the counter when done with it. He heads over towards the food to pick up a slider and popping the small burger into his mouth. "I like Rogue One. I think it may even be my top Star Wars movie, but it is a close second if Empire beats it out." the enforcer says after swallowing the slider. "I am just surprised Disney had the balls to do that ending. I was positive they were going to do some kind of deus ex machine in the end, but they didn't and for that it certainly had my respect. As far as Mando is concerned, that is some Lone Wolf and Cub shit right there. I'm all over it."

"Eating the tie fighters is fine. They were a horrible ship design, and everyone knew it. Everything I ever read addressing that was like trying to put an air freshener over a full litter box." With her Switch out, Abitha was now also quietly poking at her Animal Crossing island while she ate and watched the movie. Seemed whatever comment she had made about her Christmas was related to a lack of food because she was systematically destroying her plate. Her eyes lift to Ravn.

"You don't have to tell me. I mean," she tosses her head back and forth, "The inherent sexism and toxic masculinity was a clear marker of the era the movies were made in, but then you have the EU." Which was up to Ravn to (incorrectly) assume what she meant, "And you've got tons of better written female parts. Jaina, Mara, late-aged Leia. Some of the villians too." She shrugs, "I'm just glad the held onto Leia being a commanding badass with the Disney takeover."

Alexander doesn't look away from the screen, but he's clearly listening to the conversation, because he breaks in briefly to ask, "What's the European Union got to do with anything? Is this a commentary on the factors that led to the world wars? A science fiction parable relating to the rise of global republicanism over more authoritarian regimes? From the opening crawl, I'm assuming that the Emperor is a weak scion, perhaps inbred, and surrounded by more actively villainous counselors."

Joey shakes his head looking to Alexander, "Far from i. He's patient, pathological, and fucking cunning. Like Margaret Addington with bad skin." 0 love lost on the Addington front. He looks to Mac and nods slowly. "The original stories ain't gonna pass the beschel test, but if you watch Rogue One then watch New hope and watch her bullshit Vader it's fucking priceless." There's a pause and he looks down at the little boneyard on his plate looking back to Alexander, "Still pissed the wedding was put off." Looking up to Ravn he clues him in since, maybe Abitha heard this second hand? He doesn't know. "He," thumbing to Alexander, "Almost married me and Nicole dressed at Han and Leia. It was pretty bitchin. Might still do it. I dunno what she wants. I think she would make a great Cara Dune tho."

Ravn can't help a soft laugh at Mac's little lecture. He shakes his head lightly and admits, "Barring the idea that yes, obviously, Princess Leia did not stay nineteen years old indefinitely, I have no idea who any of those people are or how they correlate to the European Union. But, that's more a matter of me not being very familiar with this element of pop culture, and I think you very much proved my point. Sexism and toxic masculinity, though -- pretty much everything I do know about the newest trilogy I gleaned from some very angry people in the so-called manosphere who were quite upset with some of the concepts. Apparently the new girl destroyed the Jedi Knights? I don't even know her name."

The name of Cara Dune doesn't ring any bells either, that much is clear from the man's blank look. "I saw a rather great exchange on Twitter a while back. Somebody wrote that Star Wars was for boys, and someone else asked Mark Hamill about it -- that's the guy who plays Luke. He replied that without Leia taking over her own rescue, it'd have been one short movie. I think the one reason that the original movie fails Bechdel is not so much that women can't talk about anything but men but that there only is one woman. Also, get married already."

"I was always drawn to Vader. Back when I first saw the movies I always found him way more interesting than Luke, Leia, or even Han, but Han was always a close second." Seth says as he munches away from his plate of food. "I think it was just something about the armor and the mystery." The enforcer shrugs while he takes a sip of his beer to wash things down. He doesn't dive into the political correctness of the movie, leaving that topic alone. "The prequels were crap, and the new movies are really just a rehash of the original trilogy with new characters with all the fan service they played. Same story beats, and even the same bloody ending for the first one." Seth shakes his head, "But...it was still Star Wars."

Seth looks over at Joey, "Yeah...if you are going to get married you best do it before Cris and Dante do. You have had the idea longer, so it would suck if they beat you to the punch."

"No, not..." Abitha makes a frustrated sound, "Dammit, can you be less European?" It didn't explain Alexander's misunderstanding, but that didn't seem to mean much to Abitha's ribbing, "Extended Universe. All the books and stuff that Disney ended up throwing out as canon when they got the franchise." Abitha sets her plate aside and cleans her hands, picking her Switch up and running her little character around collecting.

"I was always in it for the universe. The world around it, the details, worlds, cultures they spun up. Also the past's version of the future was kinda cool to watch. All those horrible screen displays." She laughs, pointing to the droids in the scene.

Ravn is in fact so European that at the moment he's on European time. Maybe that's why he's asleep in his couch corner. Oh well. He did say he'd seen the original trilogy before.

Alexander considers Joey's correction. "Huh." His fingers twitch as he watches, as if he feels like he should be taking notes. And without looking away, he says, "First, I wasn't actually able to perform marriages then. Second, you were intoxicated. Third, you hadn't actually asked Nicole if she wanted to marry you, yet. I'm not going to perform a marriage under those circumstances, Kelly."

"He's got a breathing problem," Alexander points out, re: Vader. "I assume there's some sort of fascinating revelation that requires his face to be masked - a mask is usually a sign of dehumanization, so you rarely see main characters in any narrative remain masked unless there's a plot purpose to it." He points. "Now, these guys in the white masks, the dehumanization is clearly an intended effect. They're faceless, nameless, interchangeable cogs of an oppressive social system. We're not supposed to sympathize with them, so they can't be allowed any sort of human features." He munches on a wing. "Or, apparently, be allowed to shoot straight. Although I'd imagine that's the fault of the masks." A sidelong look towards Abitha. "There are books?"

Apparently the new girl destroyed the Jedi Knights? Joey smirks and grumbles, "Anything threatened by inclusivity needs to be fucking destroyed because it's built wrong. Rei's a badass. I'll fight this room. yeah yeah, they're formulaic but I think it kinda reminds us that the problem doesn't go away because you bury a guy in a hole. There's a lot fuckin to it and it shows us, I think, with Luke that you can't fuckin hide you gotta pass on what you fuckin know cause someone else, eventually will need the tools to deal with these problems. It ain't about fuckin Luke. It's about practice to defeat a systemic problem born within a corrupt government." And that said? Wingies.

there's a pause and he frowns to Alexander, "I did so! Now lucky for me she's got shit taste in men and she said, ya know, a'ight, yeah, so there ya go." Looking to Seth he shakes his head, "Gotta make it past New Years. Somethin about taxes and some asshole giving everyone a hard time." Reyes. He does, however, munch his tie fighter helping Clayton out, "They're clones too. Clone Wars was good. They give themselves identity and shit. They're not supposed to hit them right now though. It's a um... what's them things??" Shit it was in a movie and he read it in Alexander's stupid book. "A ruse. A cunning attempt at trickery to deceive Solo sot hey can track em."

"That doesn't explain why they are still piss poor shots in the other flicks." Seth snorts, lifting his bottle of beer to his lips and taking a sip. "Let's be honest, even after this movie the Troopers were not known to be accurate shots, there are a ton of jokes out there about it. Like the one Trooper standing at the urinal and pissing off to the side. They have a reputation... I know, canonically they are supposed to be badasses, but they never really show that in the movies."

At the comment about taxes and assholes, Seth nods once. "Well, soon enough then. Congrats man, by the way, if I hadn't already said it before."

Seth turns to Alexander and nods, "Right you are. Funny thing is that I don't recall how people realized why he had to wear the mask. Maybe it was in a book or something, but to my knowledge, it was never mentioned in the movies...until the prequel ones anyway."

Her last jibe having been at Ravn, Abitha was apparently first to notice the Dane had passed out. Her phone makes a brief appearance, checking the time, and doing a quick Google search. Realization dawns on her face and she gets up carefully, retrieving a blanket and draping it over Ravn before taking both their finished plates into the kitchen. She then returns to her spot and tucks in again.

"There were two explanations, one in the extended universe, then one in the prequels. I won't spoil it."

Alexander side-eyes Joey at his sudden burst of philosophy. He looks a bit surprised, and a touch impressed. "Well said, Kelly," he murmurs, then in more exasperated tones, "You asked her right then! After you asked me to perform the ceremony!" HARUMPH. He waggles a wing bone at Kelly. "That isn't the way to do things. I'm glad you're planning it out a bit more." Apparently Alexander has Opinions on marriage. Who would have thought?"

"Two explanations?" He frowns. "Which one is the true one, then?"

Joey eats his wings with a grunt, "Whichever one makes you fuckin happy. The point of fiction is kinda take from it what you need to. It's not a documentary so you're allowed to let it interpret how you want really. You wanna watch this for the muppets? Fuckin do it man." There's a pause and he looks over to Abitha and sits silent for a moment before he asks, "We're in agreement on Ashoka being the biggest badass at least?" Is it a good day? His food is shaped like little ships. Fuck the world, he's off duty right now.

"Tano? We agree." Abitha smirks as she glances from her game to Joey, "And the official canon is the movie. The book versions explained that the Dark Side was not only toxic to the spirit, it would rot the body as well. Darth Vader was supposed to be more powerful than the Emperor, which was why he was full facemask respirator, while the Emperor just looked like the cryptkeeper." Her eyes were back on her island with occasional glances at the movie, and the briefest, covert checks on Ravn.

"I have a confession to make. I have not watched Clone Wars, or any of the cartoons that have been out recently, and my knowledge of the EU is restricted to the first few Zhan books. Once I heard they dropped a moon on someone, I gave up on them." Seth says almost sheepishly.

Seth cocks his head and looks over at Abitha with a quizzical expression, "But..." he looks over at Alexander then back, as he forms his words carefully as to try and avoid spoilers. "Isn't Cryptkeeper because of Windu and Facemask because of Mustafar? Did I miss something somewhere in the movies? Now I am confused."

"There has to be a true answer," Alexander insists, with a frown. "How can two things simultaneously be true and contradictory? More, how can people create new stories without knowing which past event is the right one to use? It creates discontinuity. Confusion," he waves a hand towards Seth, "and chaos." He relaxes a little when Abitha clarifies a canon answer, but still scowls at the television, clearly blaming the movie for it's SHODDY STORYTELLING. But he starts getting into it again, and gestures at Luke and Leia on screen. "So, those two end up together, right?"

"Mufasa what?" Abitha mutters quietly, sending Seth a look. Her phone makes an appearance again, doing a quick search. Her mouth opens in a silent 'Oh', then she nods, "Yes, those are the movie canon explanations." she confirms to Seth. To Alexnader, though, she giggles a little, "If I ever want to really frustrate Alexander, I'm going to just drop off a bunch of Japanese style fiction for him." Her laughter raises to a short burst at Alexander's question, then she quickly covers her mouth with mouth hands, Switch falling to her lap. She trades glances with the other two.

"Oh. Right. You did say book reasons. Somehow I heard movie even though you said book. I guess I am tired. I've had a few late nights." Seth stretches out and rolls his neck on his shoulders, resulting in an audible cracking sound as he realigns his vertebrae. "I didn't read the older books, just the Zhan ones, and only the first couple with Thrawn. I must have skipped the one that had that explanation in it," he says with a shrug. "So, I've been told you are a Smash Bro phenom. I'm only really good with Captian Falcon, other than that is is a crapshoot."

He glances over at Alexander, "So, enjoying it so far?"

"What's so frustrating about Japanese-style fiction?" Alexander wonders. He hasn't taken his eyes off the screen, although his mouth twitches downward in instinctive defensiveness at Abitha's laughter. Every muscle in his body tenses, for a moment - but he's, oddly enough, among friends here, and so relaxes, again. "I...guess they don't. But they seem pretty into each other," he mutters.

At Seth's question, he finally looks away. "It's interesting. It's not particularly complex, and they clearly haven't thought about the socio-economic implications of this Empire that they're building, but maybe these other books get more detailed as far as economic and sociological models? It sounds like there's a lot more beyond just this story. But it's fun. And I like the lightsabers and space fights."

"The end of the story is the middle. The rest is up to the reader to create in their mind." Abitha explains to the point of Japanese stories. She utters another short laugh, "Well, they do kiss." She trades looks with Seth, grinning, muddying the water, but going on, "There is a staggering amount of errata about it, but considering Disney is just cherrypicking what is Canon so they can write whatever they want, there's guides online to what the 'true story' is." Abitha surrounds the words with her own lifted two fingers. "But yeah, the movies are dope. The lightsaber combat only gets better with the prequels and sequels, if you can stomach the storytelling, though.

"What happens with Luke and Leia is something best revealed through watching the movies," Seth explains to Alexander as a slow grin form over his lips. "But yes, they do at least kiss at one point. There are a few other things that I just don't want to answer for you, because I want you to have the organic, natural reactions to them and don't want to influence you in any way. As far as the impacts on anything other than the main story, yeah I don't think Lucas went too far into figuring all that out until later, if at all. It's just a popcorn movie, meant to entertain."

"The storytelling is crap in the prequels, the lightsaber combat sometimes makes up for it. Give me a duel of the fates anytime," Seth agrees.

Joey focuses on the screen and has no input on the Japanese comic industry other than to say, "Continuity's malleable." There's a pause and he answers Alexander's Luke/Leia question with an amused, "Technically yes but not how you're thinking and you're welcome for that. Seriously without her rescuing her rescuers this'd been the shortest trilogy ever." There's a pause and he considers Seth's assessment, "The costuming was good the architecture was neat and I liked the pod racing. Also we get to see my girl Shak-Ti whoop some ass."

"That's what Mark Hamill said," Ravn murmurs sleepily. The master of cat naps seems to have pried at least one eye half-open. He's probably wondering why the movie skipped half an hour ahead, and where that blanket came from. But he's warm and snug and comfortable, so maybe this is one of life's little mysteries that he's not in a rush to examine too closely.

"Continuity isn't malleable, except in Dreams. And nobody wants that," Alexander grumbles. But he waves at Abitha, and adds, "I don't mind things that are unfinished or unanswered. Wait. No. I do mind. But not in the same way. I want to solve them. But I recognize that they make good stories." He reaches for the book Ravn gave him. "See? These burglars were never caught. Story ends in the middle. But it's still interesting."

To Seth's comments, he nods. "Unbiased witness testimony is best," he agrees. "...it's pretty good, though. This story. Exciting."

"It only gets better," Seth tells Alexander, using the bottle in his hand to point towards the screen, "MY favorite movie of the original three is Empire. It's one of a handful of sequels that is better than the original. I think you will really like that one."

Seth gets up from his chair and heads towards the kitchen, "Coffee, Ravn? Or if you want to go hardcore I have some energy drinks. Those things will keep you up for days if you are not use to them."

Looking over to Joey, Seth nods. "Oh the scenery and everything else was nice, but the actual story was sub-par at best. And don't even get me started on Jar-Jar."

"Both? Christ, I am so tired." Ravn shows no intention of emerging from his blanket nest. "If I'm going to stay conscious I definitely need all the caffeine in Gray Harbor. But then, if I pass out again, maybe just toss me out on the curb with the rest of the garbage in the morning?"

He yawns profusely and then declares, "I like A New Hope best. But that won't surprise anyone -- it's one big mish-mash of cultural tropes, after all. If I wanted to make you all hate me I'd call each character out as the Boy Hero, the Evil Wizard, and so on, as they appear. I had a lecturer who taught basic literary analysis using that movie. That's why it's a bloody masterpiece."

Abitha had seem rather focused on just watching or playing at this point, tucked into her little corner, of the couch, chopping wood or smacking rocks with shovels. She had pointedly not looked at Ravn when he’d awoken, perhaps embarrassed at the cursory caretaking she’d done of him.

“I’d never pick a favorite, I don’t think, but I don’t rewatch things.” There’s a casual shrug made to accompany that. It seemed an odd statement to make when that’s exactly what she was doing.

"There was a story?" His eyebrow goes up looking to Seth shaking his head, "Like porn, man, it's best when viewed when silenced and making up your own dubbing for it cause the script is fucking terrible." He watches and considers Ravn's critique pausing and looking to Abitha, "Sorry." Hey she's a lady person. That might have been rude...isn't he supposed to want to have her shot or something? Who knows. "I heard someone say it was the quest for the holy grail story, but I never saw Chewie with coconuts, so I dunno."

"Coconuts?" Alexander wonders, with bewilderment. Otherwise, he's listening, but focused on watching. Oh, well, mostly focused on watching, because when Joey mentions the holy grail, he says, "Has anyone read Holy Blood, Holy Grail? The idea was that Jesus actually married Mary Magdalen, and their kids were the actual 'holy grail', and they came to have the strongest claim to the French crown. It's pretty wild. Secret societies, mysteries, murder, intrigue." He perks up. "Is any of that in here?"

"I have," Ravn murmurs. "And no. For that one, you want the Da Vinci Mystery. But honestly, save yourself the pain. The writer pretty much just ripped off Holy Blood, Holy Grail, fictionalised it and added a murderous albino. That said, the whole Prieure de Sion concept has been debunked since, and the guy that Blood props up as the true king of France turned out to be a fraud. Which is a pity, from a historian's point of view, because if it'd been real I'd have given my right arm for a peek at their supposed secret archives."

“I mean, if it’s real, throw in your right leg as well and get the secrets of alchemy,” Abitha quips. Joey’s remark about porn gets the expected annoyance from Abitha, a flat lipped Look given in the gym owner’s direction, but is otherwise not commented on. You’d have to watch porn to have opinions besides ’Ew, gross’.

"Isn't that the basis of the DaVinci Code?" Seth asks as he looks over at Alexander as he starts to make some coffee. "I haven't read that book, but I saw the movie and I seem to recall something about that, but maybe I am mixing my movies up." He is then pointing at Ravn, "Ok..so I am not crazy."

Joey gets a chuckle, "Porn has a story? Like anyone watches porn long enough to notice there is one. People only watch porn in fifteen to twenty-minute intervals at a time, man." He looks over to Abitha as Joey apologizes and a faint blush might come to his cheeks, "Er..yeah. Sorry." The comment about not rewatching things gets an arched brow of confusion, but the enforcer just shrugs it off with a rolling of his shoulder. He reaches into the fridge and pulls out a can of Monster (Lo-Carb) and tosses it towards Ravn in an underhand throw. "Catch."

Secret society...check.... mystery? Check...murder? eh arguably lots. Intrigue? I'd go with yes. I mean I want to know what the Hutts are up to. I dunno about French people tho." He looks to Seth's question and then Abitha with an empty stare of I didn't write it "Legit there's two where you just fast forward though people doing whatever to get back to the plot. I think one's called Game of Thrones." He goes back to eating his ribs undaunted. He's got no horse in this race. "The sit rep with continuity, Alexander, is you get a bunch of writers, they all do whatever they want. No one talks or they do and don't care. In the end they scraped it all and said okay we're officially caring starting now."

Ravn un-nests a hand long enough to catch that can and indeed, open it with a fizz. "Da Vinci Code, right. Not mystery. Either way, that. I wouldn't bother. You don't much do fiction -- do better fiction than that." With a glance to Joey he adds, "Wait, are you calling Game of Thrones porn? I'm not sure I disagree entirely, but I will fight you on the idea that it's actually sexy. None of those women are supposed to be a day over sixteen canonically except the one who's banging her brother."

He hitches a shoulder and sinks deeper into the blanket nest with the energy drink. "Don't get me started on the so-called historical correctness of Game of Thrones that its author tries to market it as. Consider that your one, fair warning. I will rant."

"Da Vinci Mystery," Alexander murmurs, in the tone of someone making a mental note. "I do think most things can be improved by murder. But obviously it was nonsense. It was interesting nonsense, though, because so many people wanted to believe it. And there was a lot of interesting historical weirdness attached to it." He grins towards Abitha. "Alchemy is also fun, you know. I experimented with it in college. The people in my cult had access to some genuine alchemical notebooks from the Middle Ages, so we tried to decipher and recreate some of the recipes." He chuckles. "Mostly just horribly toxic things." He looks completely oblivious regarding both porn and Game of Thrones, but listens with interest.

Seth, as well, receives that look, though adding a one-eye-bigger- than-the-other stink eye. Abitha throws in a judgmental look at the low-carb Monster can, her lips and nose creasing into a grimace. Obviously, the gamer had certain ideals about energy drinks. Then it’s Game of Thrones and Abitha was about to open her mouth to comment and... just shuts down, very intent on her game. She wasn’t about to get into a debate of oversexualization with a room full of grown men. Alexander’s comment about the cult gets a look of concern, furrowed browns and withdrawn lips, but again, she refrains from commenting.

"I've already told Alexander that Game of Thrones is next on his watch list.," Seth says with a chuckle to the group at large. "Don't spoil it too much for him. Yeah, there is a lot of sex in it and some pretty bad situations, but the story in and of itself isn't that bad..at least up until the last season anyway, but if you are reading or watching it for historical accuracy that is going to be an issue for sure."

The stinkeye from Abith causes Seth to give her a sheepish grin and a shrug, "Well...it's true, isn't it? Regardless of anyone's personal preferences on porn, those that do watch it don't watch it for story."

The word 'cult' falling out of Alexander's lips has Seth's head turn towards him with a "Wait, what? You were in a cult?" He looks around the room and shakes his head. "You know what. Some other time. This is supposed to be a fun thing, and we don't need to dive into that today."

"Nothing wrong with watching something for its own sake. Game of Thrones, Vikings -- call them what they are. Fantasy series with some more or less mutilated historical background. I'm good with that. Try to pass them off as historical, or even educational? I will spork you." Ravn clearly has Opinions on historical fantasy. "That's why Star Wars is fun. It takes all those old tropes and myths and mashes them into something that's both very familiar and all brand new. You can tell that the original trilogy is from the seventies, obviously -- practically no women or people of colour. But at least it's not trying to convince you that you can get academic credit for quoting it."

He pauses a second. "Though, uh, actually, with that lecturer of mine you could."

Alexander rolls his shoulders. "I was in three." But he doesn't elaborate beyond that, instead just bobbing his head to agree to watch Game of Thrones next. His tone is approving as he agrees with Ravn, "It's better not to confuse fiction with reality. Even things which are inspired by true events often take liberties with the truth that just confuse people and make it harder for them to understand how the event actually occurred." He clears his throat. "Not that I don't like true crime. I do. But even there, you have to be skeptical, because a lot of authors write with an eye to proving their own pet theory on how the event occurred, or who was actually responsible. Even primary sources have their own biases."

“What about Game of Thrones was supposed to be historical besides the fact that nobility was incestuous as fuck?” Abitha finally chimes in, but the mere mention was enough to make her put her tongue out as if gagging, even if it was a genuine question. The expression was just as effective in Seth’s remark as well, adding a wonderfully narrow-minded blanket statement, “People are gross.”

Joey looks to Abitha and waits on that answer. "Noooo, Abitha, people are fucking awful. They burned down your goddamned shop. You of all people I think would get that. It's why we don't feel bad when bad things happen to em. Game of Thrones had two things going for it. Cool wolves and badass dragons that ate slavers and that stopped too. That's when I tuned out." Giving her a dry look he says, "Don't get me started in the Lanisters. We'll be here all fucking day and I like Seth's house not ruined." With a sigh he says "Cans we get back to the grown ass man stuffing himself inside a tauntaun?"

"George R. R. Martin insists on babbling on Twitter about how the incest scene and various other famous plot bits are lifted from historical events," Ravn elaborates. "He's not wrong -- most of the parts that generate headlines were lifted from historical sources. He just neglects the part where those events occurred over a span of about eight hundred years and an entire continent, while he smushes them together in about eight at best. So if you view Game of Thrones as representative of how much life sucked in the Middle Ages, and how decadent the nobility was -- it sort of compares to taking every murder in the history of the United States and claiming that they all happened in one month; and then arguing that that month is the American normal. Even for Gray Harbor, that'd be absurd."

He glances over at Joey. "I think that's in Empire? And let me just say this: Any stories about adorable little five year old Ravn definitely trying to recreate that scene with a very large bag of cement and a pair of sharp scissors is lying."

"They sure are," agrees Seth as he nods in Abitha's direction. "You won't get any argument from me on that front. People are gross. We do gross things, we have gross habits, and even as civilized as humanity has become deep down we are still nothing but animals that have just managed to crawl ourselves out of the muck and slime. Some people don't get to much further than that."

Seth gives Joey a look and nods. "Agreed. Besides, they are just about to do the run on the Death Star. Important things afoot." Seth looks over to the Dane and grins, "Hey, Ravn, do you know the temperature inside of a tauntan? Lukewarm."

Joey falls notably quiet and focuses intently on two things: His ribs, and Han trying not to crash the Millennium Falcon prongs first into anything. The view is pretty consistent with any other time he's been asked about things: Bad things happening to bad people is not a thing to lose sleep over. The wolves are the reason to watch the show. Clearly. "No, Seth, we sure don't." Zoning out commencing now. He does pause to add, "How does everyone speak Wookie? Was it an elective in college?"

"I would assume some sort of universal translator technology. The same way they understand what the little beeping trashcan is saying," Alexander says, practically. "There are what, over a dozen species in this society? They can't possibly memorize all of those languages on a regular basis." He's also absorbed in the space fighting, although he cuts Joey a side-eye at some of the man's comments, and murmurs, "Ravn's right. The incestuousness is largely over-stated. And it was a common method of propaganda against nobles that were disliked, so it's hard to tell how many of the accusations were even grounded in reality. Some dynasties did favor it, but...it wasn't a usual thing. Unless you count cousins, which gets complicated."

"Marrying your cousin is still legal in a lot of places," Ravn points out. "It's legal in Denmark, and I think here too, at least in some states? I don't know that I'd want to marry mine -- any of them. There were a couple of European houses that had... issues. The Hapsburgs literally inbred themselves out of existence. Queen Victoria of England is a shared ancestor for pretty much every royal house still in existence in Europe, but to be fair, she had about six million kids. Also, if Wookiee had been an option in college? I'd have been all over it."

"It's Shyriiwook, not Wookiee," corrects Seth grinning. "I think, if I am not mistaken, Han is the only one that speaks it in the original trilogy. He has to translate everything, or maybe 3PO does as well. At least we don't have to hear Han or the other try to speak in it."

The enforcer shrugs, "Ok, so I might be a little bit of a Star Wars geek. Still, not as bad as some!"

Joey stands up and wades back into the kitchen lifting up the lid of the trash can and heading out the side door. He's not heading back to his car, but he does quietly take what is a break to go have the rare but occasional enough cigarette and takes a look around the side of the house out of habit.

Alexander watches Joey leave with that sharp eyed curiosity he gets, but at least he manages not to stand up and follow him out to snoop. Instead, he makes himself relax and grin at Seth. "You seem to enjoy it a lot. That's good." He glances back at the screen. "I can see why people could become a huge fan of something like this, though. It hints at a lot of depth, but doesn't try to over-explain. I like it."

"I don't think I'm in a position to chide anyone for being a nerd," Ravn murmurs in a moment of self-awareness and puts the empty energy drink can on the table. Gloved hands disappear back in under the blanket; it's possible that he will need to be pried loose with a crowbar when the time to leave rolls around.

"It leaves a lot of space for adding your own stories. I always felt sorry for that guy on Yavin with the binoculars, though. In a time where they can track the movements of a space station on a monitor, they still send some lonely bloke up a mast with binocs to see who's coming in."

"Cloaking tech," explains Seth. "You might be able to hide from electronic surveillance, but you can't beat eyes. At least that is my take on it. I don't know if that was the intended take on it." Seth says with a shrug as he makes his way back to his chair with a fresh beer. "Or, just like in one of the other movies you send off a beacon that shows you are one thing when in reality you are something else. If you are broadcasting as a tie fighter, but look like an x-wing..." Seth shrugs his shoulder, "Harder to trick eyes."

Joey parks his ass on Seths' porch. The neighbor is home and since Seth lives all of BOTH DOORS DOWN from Joey it makes him a mutual neighbor. Overhead "No I haven't been drinking I in't headed back home yet." People love giving him shit when his car moves don't they? At least the locals seem to be on friendly terms with the Crew, but that can happen when a- most of them buy from you, and b- you keep worse shit off their lawn. Something about neighborly appreciation. The south block of Elm can be bad news...unless you belong there.

"I think that's probably one of the things that builds investment," Alexander muses. "Mystique. The ability to fill in the shadows with your own expectations and desires." And, let's face it, Alexander isn't going to be the one to tease anyone about their weird interests. "And Seth's explanation makes sense." He peers at the television. "I don't really feel like I understand the Force, though. I liked that Obi Wan guy."

"No one else did either," Ravn murmurs. "I think it's basically plotspeak for God is on our side, or He would be if He existed in this universe. If you can use it, then clearly you're a good guy. Or if you use the Dark Side you're a bad guy. Nice and simple division down the middle. Don't need to explain much because the other guys are obviously bad and deserve everything."

"Just don't fall into the explanations they give in the prequels. God, that was just...bad." Seth explains as he shakes his head disappointed. "Lucas really screwed the pooch on that one, in my opinion anyway. Went from mystical energies to tiny microbe bullshit. So lame." Seth...has opinions.

As the Death Star explodes, Vader is sent spinning off into the reaches of space, and Chewie gets robbed of getting a medal, Seth stands up to get ready to switch the movie over to Empire. "And now my personal favorite out of them all, The Empire Strikes Back. Take your bio-breaks now."

Somebody isn't taking a bio-break. Ravn fell asleep again during the medal ceremony. Maybe it was the idea of midichlorians that made him pass out.