2020-02-17 - Gnomes Suck

(TXT to Patrick Beth Anne Hyacinth Alexander) Enzo: A gnome peed on me tonight. (Scene 3997)
%% Patrick is 5h idle and may be AFK.

(TXT to Patrick Beth Anne Hyacinth Alexander) Enzo: I'm going back in there and I'm getting my revenge. (Scene 3998)

(TXT to Patrick Beth Hyacinth Alexander Enzo) Anne: I'm sorry what? (Scene 3998)

(TXT to Patrick Beth Hyacinth Alexander Enzo) Anne: Are you drunk? Patrick, is Enzo drunk? (Scene 3998)
%% Patrick is 5h idle and may be AFK.

(TXT to Patrick Beth Anne Hyacinth Alexander) Enzo: I'm not drunk i'm at the GD hospital again (Scene 3999)
%% Patrick is 5h idle and may be AFK.

(TXT to Patrick Beth Anne Hyacinth Alexander) Enzo : and I'm not at the hospital because i'm drunk, i need like 30 stitches again

(TXT to Patrick Beth Hyacinth Alexander Enzo) Anne: What did you do? (Scene 3998)

(TXT to Patrick Beth Anne Hyacinth Enzo) Alexander: wtf (Scene 3998)

(TXT to Patrick Beth Anne Hyacinth Alexander) Enzo: i went into the viel with August and this Niall guy and a gnome dove out of a tree and chewed my shoulder up (Scene 4001)

(TXT to Patrick Beth Anne Hyacinth Alexander) Enzo: also maybe we shouldn't fuck with the plants in there they seem all fucked up (Scene 4002)

(TXT to Patrick Beth Hyacinth Alexander Enzo) Anne: It was just one gnome? Are you sure it wasn't a Dream? (Scene 3998)
%% Patrick is 5h idle and may be AFK.

(TXT to Patrick Beth Anne Hyacinth Alexander) Enzo: I opened up the door and I went through the door and I took them with me. (Scene 4003)

%% Patrick is 5h idle and may be AFK.

(TXT to Patrick Beth Anne Hyacinth Alexander) Enzo: And it was more than one gnome, it was like a gnome tribe and one of them chewed me up and then another one peed on me and I have pustles on my leg. (Scene 4004)

(TXT to Patrick Anne Enzo Hyacinth Alexander) Beth: What is with small human-like things trying to chew on you? (Scene 4002)
%% Patrick is 5h idle and may be AFK.

(TXT to Patrick Beth Anne Hyacinth Alexander) Enzo: I'm going back in there after I feel better and I'm going to fight them. (Scene 4005)

(TXT to Patrick Beth Hyacinth Alexander Enzo) Anne: Are you trying to suggest that there's an entire tribe of gnomes living in the forest on the other side? (Scene 3998)

(TXT to Patrick Beth Hyacinth Alexander Enzo) Anne: and oh my god I did not need to know that about your leg WHY WERE THEY PEEING ON YOU??? (Scene 3998)
%% Patrick is 5h idle and may be AFK.

(TXT to Patrick Beth Anne Hyacinth Alexander) Enzo: I'm not SUGGESTING it (Scene 4006)
%% Patrick is 5h idle and may be AFK.

(TXT to Patrick Beth Anne Hyacinth Alexander) Enzo: I'm TELLING YOU (Scene 4007)
%% Patrick is 5h idle and may be AFK.

(TXT to Patrick Beth Anne Hyacinth Alexander) Enzo: (many pictures of Enzo's various new injuries are sent into the group chat) (Scene 4008)

(TXT to Patrick Beth Hyacinth Alexander Enzo) Anne: You're going to fight the gnomes? (Scene 3998)

(TXT to Patrick Beth Hyacinth Alexander Enzo) Anne: OK I'm going to be sick. (Scene 3998)

(TXT to Patrick Anne Enzo Hyacinth Alexander) Beth: Wait gnomes peeing on you did that? (Scene 4002)

(TXT to Patrick Beth Anne Hyacinth Alexander) Enzo : Yes, the gnomes peeing on me did that (ooc: I stopped all the extra scenes, just text to scene 4000 plz lol)

(TXT to Enzo Patrick Beth Hyacinth Alexander) Anne : If it's an actual community, Enzo, I don't think we should be killing them

(TXT to Patrick Beth Hyacinth Alexander Anne) Enzo : they're clearly corrupted by whatever is wrong with the forest

(TXT to Patrick Beth Hyacinth Alexander Anne) Enzo : we'd be doing them a favor and they could never PISS someone into the hospital again

(TXT to Enzo Patrick Beth Hyacinth Alexander) Anne : Is there something wrong with the forest over there?!

(TXT to Patrick Beth Hyacinth Alexander Anne) Enzo : yeah, it's all fucked up! I said that, we should stop messing with those plants! Also i was definitely bleeding to death for awhile 🙁

(TXT to Patrick Beth Hyacinth Alexander Enzo) Anne : Who is messing with the plants???

(TXT to Patrick Beth Hyacinth Alexander Anne) Enzo : August like was putting grafts on them or something

(TXT to Patrick Beth Hyacinth Alexander Enzo) Anne : WHAT?

(TXT to Patrick Beth Hyacinth Alexander Anne) Enzo : What? Isn't that his name?

(TXT to Patrick Beth Hyacinth Alexander Enzo) Anne : Why would he do that?!

(TXT to Patrick Beth Hyacinth Alexander Anne) Enzo : Or fuck, it's September isn't it?

(TXT to Patrick Beth Hyacinth Alexander Enzo) Anne : It's February, Enzo, are you sure you're not drunk?

(TXT to Patrick Beth Hyacinth Alexander Anne) Enzo : Uh he said it was to see what our biological impact would be over there? something like that.

(TXT to Patrick Beth Hyacinth Alexander Anne) Enzo : NO THE GUY'S NAME IS SEPTEMBER

(TXT to Patrick Beth Hyacinth Alexander Anne) Enzo : or August

(TXT to Patrick Beth Hyacinth Alexander Enzo) Anne : His name is August!

(TXT to Patrick Beth Hyacinth Alexander Anne) Enzo : i really wish I was drunk

(TXT to Patrick Beth Hyacinth Alexander Enzo) Anne : We shouldn't be messing with the plants over there!

(TXT to Patrick Beth Hyacinth Alexander Anne) Enzo : anyway the gnomes said their forest was fucked up now and i think they wanted us to help them

(TXT to Patrick Beth Hyacinth Alexander Anne) Enzo : but I don't want to help them, i'm angry, they can fix their own forest

(TXT to Patrick Anne Enzo Hyacinth Alexander) Beth : So what did you do to make them piss acid on you?

(TXT to Patrick Anne Hyacinth Alexander Beth) Enzo : Ugh

(TXT to Patrick Anne Hyacinth Alexander Beth) Enzo : so

(TXT to Patrick Hyacinth Alexander Beth Enzo) Anne : I mean that's a reasonable response after getting peed on but I don't think we should go murder their entire village 😕

(TXT to Patrick Hyacinth Alexander Beth Anne) Enzo : The tress have some bloody stuff on them and August tried to take a sample but the sample burst into flames and then he dropped the fire onto the floor and the forest ignited

(TXT to Patrick Hyacinth Alexander Beth Anne) Enzo : and so we were trying to put it out and then the gnome dove out of the tree and onto my shoulder and I was trying to get off so I accidentally wandered off the path

(TXT to Patrick Hyacinth Alexander Beth Enzo) Anne : Wait

(TXT to Patrick Hyacinth Alexander Beth Enzo) Anne : You burned down the forest?

(TXT to Patrick Hyacinth Alexander Beth Anne) Enzo : and then I guess they broke a mushroom house with a gnome baby in it and the village elder finally got this asshole off of me and I kicked his leg and I think he's dead

(TXT to Patrick Hyacinth Alexander Beth Anne) Enzo : NO

(TXT to Patrick Hyacinth Alexander Beth Anne) Enzo : it started to go on fire but we stopped it

(TXT to Patrick Anne Enzo Hyacinth Alexander) Beth : So you guys burnt down their forest and injured a baby and probably killed it's grandpa which is why they pissed their strangely caustic pee on you?

(TXT to Patrick Anne Hyacinth Alexander Beth) Enzo : and then since I was bleeding all over myself Niall wanted to help him but the elder said no

(TXT to Patrick Hyacinth Alexander Beth Enzo) Anne : Is this baby okay?!

(TXT to Patrick Hyacinth Alexander Beth Anne) Enzo : but then i guess that was annoying them so they spit some sort of healing spit on me

(TXT to Patrick Hyacinth Alexander Beth Enzo) Anne : I'm so confused right now, why did you guys try to burn down the forest?

(TXT to Patrick Hyacinth Alexander Beth Anne) Enzo : but one of them peed on me because he was a jerk

(TXT to Patrick Hyacinth Alexander Beth Anne) Enzo : i don't know, i wasn't really around for a lot of that part I was fighting off the dude that attacked me

(TXT to Patrick Hyacinth Alexander Beth Anne) Enzo : I didn't! August dropped the fire on accident

(TXT to Patrick Hyacinth Alexander Beth Anne) Enzo : i'm an innocent bystander

(TXT to Patrick Hyacinth Alexander Beth Enzo) Anne : I mean it sounds like the gnome tried to protect the forest, and thought you were trying to destroy it...

(TXT to Patrick Hyacinth Alexander Beth Enzo) Anne : But okay. I believe you. These gnomes sound awful.

(TXT to Patrick Hyacinth Alexander Beth Enzo) Anne : But I really don't think we should be going over there and destroying communities or trying to experiment with plants!

(TXT to Patrick Hyacinth Alexander Beth Anne) Enzo : I was just a door opener, a door man! I didn't set any fires

(TXT to Patrick Hyacinth Alexander Beth Enzo) Anne : I believe you Enzo.

(TXT to Patrick Hyacinth Alexander Beth Anne) Enzo : I also didn't experiment on the plants

(TXT to Patrick Hyacinth Alexander Beth Anne) Enzo : fine whatever. i won't destroy their community.

(TXT to Patrick Hyacinth Beth Anne Enzo) Alexander : i don't see why. all they do is hurt us.

(TXT to Patrick Hyacinth Beth Enzo Alexander) Anne : Because we don't know if doing stuff over here changes things over here.

(TXT to Patrick Hyacinth Beth Enzo Alexander) Anne : Doing stuff over there*

(TXT to Patrick Hyacinth Beth Alexander Anne) Enzo : i mean i guess they might be less pissed if their forest wasn't trying to eat them

(TXT to Patrick Hyacinth Beth Alexander Enzo) Anne : The forest is trying to eat them? Is this recent?

(TXT to Patrick Hyacinth Beth Alexander Anne) Enzo : it sounded like eat plants but now the plants eat them

(TXT to Patrick Hyacinth Beth Anne Enzo) Alexander : I just think that since they're always HURTING US that maybe setting things right might be burning down their forest and murdering all the evil little fucks over there.

(TXT to Patrick Hyacinth Beth Anne Enzo) Alexander : i think that would make things better.

(TXT to Patrick Hyacinth Beth Anne Alexander) Enzo : are you okay tonight alexander, i'm going to have some really great drugs soon and i'll share them with you.

(TXT to Patrick Hyacinth Beth Alexander Enzo) Anne : I think maybe we should sleep on this one and let Enzo get better..

(TXT to Patrick Hyacinth Beth Alexander Enzo) Anne : I'll come see you in the hospital tomorrow Enzo, we can talk about the gnomes then.

(TXT to Patrick Hyacinth Beth Anne Enzo) Alexander : im not okay. But i didn't get peed on. Small mercies. get better. i'll bring booze.

(TXT to Patrick Hyacinth Beth Anne Alexander) Enzo : okay fine. i guess i can't go fight them or anything tonight. fml. see you guys tomorrow.

(TXT to Enzo Beth Hyacinth Alexander Anne) Patrick : I would like, one day, to wake up without a series of completely incoherent text messages.

(TXT to Patrick Beth Enzo Alexander Anne) Hyacinth : OMG you're in the hospital!? Enzo we have places to go today. I can't take you anywhere covered in gnome pee

(TXT to Enzo Beth Hyacinth Anne Patrick) Alexander : That day is not today.

(TXT to Patrick Beth Enzo Alexander Anne) Hyacinth : Oh, also are you ok?

(TXT to Enzo Patrick Beth Anne Hyacinth) Alexander : I'm taking him some clothes so he can go home. Unlikely to be gnome peed.

(TXT to Enzo Beth Hyacinth Alexander Anne) Patrick : Enzo, do you have your keys? Because I locked your apartment this morning (wrongfully assuming you were inside it).

(TXT to Beth Hyacinth Alexander Anne Patrick) Enzo : Alexander is going to get me out of the hospital. I talked to my doctors.

(TXT to Hyacinth Alexander Enzo Patrick Beth) Anne : According to the pictures, he's covered in pustules not pee.

(TXT to Patrick Beth Enzo Alexander Anne) Hyacinth : Nevermind you're eating hospital food. And thank you Alexander. I'll come by after work. People are being stupid and I have to go explain someone's job to them at City Hall.

(TXT to Patrick Beth Alexander Anne Hyacinth) Enzo : I have keys still. Why were you in my apartment?/

(TXT to Patrick Beth Enzo Alexander Anne) Hyacinth : I'm going to pretend you said hives and we'll stop there.

(TXT to Patrick Beth Alexander Anne Hyacinth) Enzo : Beth is right. it's pustules now.

(TXT to Enzo Hyacinth Patrick Beth Anne) Alexander : Did they say you can go home? And do you really want to KNOW why Patrick was in your apartment? Really?

(TXT to Hyacinth Alexander Enzo Patrick Beth) Anne : Don't scroll thru the pictures that he sent last night.

(TXT to Patrick Beth Enzo Alexander Anne) Hyacinth : What pictures?

(TXT to Patrick Beth Enzo Alexander Anne) Hyacinth : Oh god, Enzo, WHY did you do this to us?? You. Why did you do this to you??!

(TXT to Patrick Beth Alexander Anne Hyacinth) Enzo : I didn't do it to me!!! THE GNOME DID

(TXT to Patrick Beth Alexander Anne Hyacinth) Enzo : the doctors said some things and now I'm leaving.

(TXT to Patrick Beth Anne Hyacinth Enzo) Alexander : Good enough for me.

(TXT to Hyacinth Alexander Enzo Patrick Beth) Anne : Did they say if the leg thing was contagious?

(TXT to Patrick Beth Enzo Alexander Anne) Hyacinth : I'm getting you a small sledge hammer for my birthday, Brother. Go home with Alexander and I'll bring you food later and see how you're doing. And Anne, thank you for the updates.

(TXT to Patrick Beth Alexander Anne Hyacinth) Enzo : I don't think it is.

(TXT to Patrick Beth Enzo Alexander Anne) Hyacinth : Well if it is sure them. I don't care if they are gnomes or not. This is uncalled for.

(TXT to Patrick Beth Enzo Alexander Anne) Hyacinth : I have to go meet with the developers. I'll check in on you in a bit. <3

(TXT to Enzo Beth Hyacinth Alexander Anne) Patrick : Unpopular question: what did you THINK was going to happen?

(TXT to Enzo Beth Hyacinth Anne Patrick) Alexander : I'm pretty sure no one could have predicted being peed on by gnomes. It's not a likely outcome to any possible choice.

(TXT to Beth Hyacinth Anne Patrick Alexander) Enzo : Thank you, Alexander.

(TXT to Enzo Beth Hyacinth Alexander Anne) Patrick : If you say so.

(TXT to Enzo Beth Hyacinth Patrick Anne) Alexander : For the record. I was wrong. He got gnome peed again.

(TXT to Enzo Beth Hyacinth Patrick Alexander) Anne : I just want to note it happened at the hospital and they came to us.

(TXT to Enzo Beth Hyacinth Anne Patrick) Alexander : I can corroborate this statement. But I don't think this shirt is ever gonna be right again.

(TXT to Enzo Beth Hyacinth Patrick Alexander) Anne : It's probably better to throw it away.

(TXT to Anne Enzo Beth Patrick Hyacinth) Alexander : I feel like that might be hazardous waste. I'll burn it.

(TXT to Enzo Beth Hyacinth Patrick Alexander) Anne : That's probably for the best.

PM> (to Anne, Enzo) Alexander (ac) says, "How. How many scenes is this text convo in? 😃"

(to Alexander, Enzo) Anne says, "just the .. wtf"

(to Alexander, Anne) Enzo says, "omg why is that happening"

(to Alexander, Enzo) Anne says, "WHAT DID YOU DO"

(to Alexander, Anne) Enzo says, "I'm just been hitting text/reply?"

(to Alexander, Enzo) Anne says, "oh my god enzo how hte fuck did you do that"

(to Alexander, Anne) Enzo says, "I did let me see"

(to Alexander, Anne) Enzo says, "I did let me see OH MY GOD"

(to Alexander, Anne) Enzo says, "I DID NOT DO TEXT REPLY"

(to Alexander, Enzo) Anne says, "ahahhahhahahahahaha"

(to Alexander, Anne) Enzo says, "AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH"

(to Alexander, Enzo) Anne says, "AHAHAHAHAAHAHA I AM DYING"